Comment from Shirley E Kennedy

Excellent

Hi Bill,
My, what an active mind is at play here.
The characters are well constructed, scene is functional and outcome
a little unexpected.
It is effective in that I read the whole post and it fits the constraints of your chosen style.
Blessings
Shirley

 Comment Written 28-Apr-2023

---

reply by the author on 29-Apr-2023

Thank you, Shirley

Comment from BethShelby

Excellent

It seem you met the demands of the contest and then fullfilled your goal of changing everyones life. The two you ended were the two that were supposed to end. The rest lived happily ever after. It was a neat story worth repeating.

 Comment Written 28-Apr-2023

---

reply by the author on 28-Apr-2023

Thank you, Beth

Comment from Ulla

Excellent

Deare me, Bill. What a story! They all got to do what they wanted but not quite the outcome. This shows what vanity and stupidity can do to people who are wallowing in too much money and power. A lesson that could be well taught in today's world. Ulla:)))

 Comment Written 27-Apr-2023

---

reply by the author on 27-Apr-2023

thanks, Ulla

Comment from Mary Vigasin

Excellent

Bill, this clever and well-written story draws your reader in. You immediately hooked me, and I was curious about where this story was headed.
I was not disappointed with the fascinating characters and what each one wanted. I expected Spring Oryx would get her comeuppance and was curious as to how.
Imaginative and creative story.
Best wishes,
Mary

 Comment Written 27-Apr-2023

---

reply by the author on 27-Apr-2023

Thank you, Mary

Comment from nomi338

Exceptional

Not only did they all get what they desired, one even got what she deserved. It all works out in the end. The guilty always pays in the end, we may never see it, but that does not mean that it does not take place. That is the comfort to all the victims of abuse.

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2023

---

reply by the author on 26-Apr-2023

Thanks, nomi, for the great review.

Comment from lyenochka

Excellent

You met the detailed requirements of this interesting challenge very well! And each of the characters were well defined and got what they wanted. You wove together all these separate stories and gave each a fitting ending.

 Comment Written 26-Apr-2023

---

reply by the author on 26-Apr-2023

Thank you, Helen. I posted this originally eleven years ago. Gungalo reviewed it. Time flies.

Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell

Excellent

This is another won that should have won the contest. It was so different to the normal stuck in the lift contest. More sci-fi and brilliantly thought out. It seemed that the nice ones got their wish, while the greedy got their comeuppance. Excellent, my friend!! :)) Sandra xx

 Comment Written 26-May-2022

---

reply by the author on 26-May-2022

Thank you, Sandra. I liked this one too, but at the time some readers thought a happy suicide was callous.

Comment from kiwisteveh

Excellent

I enjoyed your rather bizarre naming convention and the fact that you didn't try to 'normalise' what was a very contrived situation, but instead took it more into the realm of weirdness.... you must have a truly warped sense of humour, so congratulations and good luck.

 Comment Written 10-Jun-2012

---

reply by the author on 10-Jun-2012

Thank you for your kind and encouraging review. Their names are types of antelope.Bill

Comment from Titanx9

Excellent

This well written, creative story includes all the players in the prompt. I believe you did a fantastic job of tying all the actors together, except for the greedy woman. I don't understand why she died and others lives. I understand why the loony teenager may have died. He was suicidal and believed he could fly. Overall, it's a well written, cogent story.

 Comment Written 10-Jun-2012

---

reply by the author on 10-Jun-2012

Thank you for your kind and encouraging review. I see your point about the death. Perhaps I'll revise and have her handing out pamplets in the lobby. Maybe the teen can survive, get his eye fixed and be a permanent elevator operator. What do you think? Bill

reply by Titanx9 on 10-Jun-2012

I don't think you should make such drastic changes. I was curious about the greedy woman and the cause for her death. If you are so inclined, perhaps a reason for her death would suffice. Do not toy with near perfection. It's a great story! Have a blessed day!

reply by the author on 10-Jun-2012

I agreed with your critique and have added two things. One, the enclosed updated description of Ms. Oryx, and the word SHIMMER uttered by the Elf. "Her lust for money and power had driven her through seven husbands (separated by divorces, deaths by natural causes, and one unindicted homicide), nine hostile takeovers, and various and sundry also-ran lovers."

reply by Titanx9 on 10-Jun-2012

Thanks Bill. I read that section and SHIMMER adds to the mystique of the piece. You knew the guide was up to something when he quickly disappeared. I don't usually like these types of stories, but this one grabbed me. Have a blessed day my friend!

Comment from fidud

Excellent

A real challenge this one, and you've risen to it admirably! Very well written story. Really creative ideas. I especially love the description of the relationship between the priest and the hooker. Excellent.

 Comment Written 10-Jun-2012

---

reply by the author on 10-Jun-2012

Thank you for your kind and encouraging review. Bill