Amongst The Shadows Of My Heart
a triolet44 total reviews
Comment from Jacqueline1616
If I had 6, I'd give it. This is beautiful and touches my own love lost. I too wish I could bend time and hold tight to my loved one that died. Great job in writing so beautifully, yet touching such real feelings of loss at once.
Jackie
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If I had 6, I'd give it. This is beautiful and touches my own love lost. I too wish I could bend time and hold tight to my loved one that died. Great job in writing so beautifully, yet touching such real feelings of loss at once.
Jackie
Comment Written 28-Jan-2016
Comment from evesayshi
My ignorance of this genre is the reason for my rating - as a comparative newby to the site, I'm still learning about the different genres of poetry. I just write as my muse dictates. My impression of this gentle work is that of a sensitive soul mourning the loss of his love. It is artistic in presentation and well constructed in flow - a singularly emotional rendering...
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
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My ignorance of this genre is the reason for my rating - as a comparative newby to the site, I'm still learning about the different genres of poetry. I just write as my muse dictates. My impression of this gentle work is that of a sensitive soul mourning the loss of his love. It is artistic in presentation and well constructed in flow - a singularly emotional rendering...
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 03-Mar-2015
Comment from MAB
Alvin, I just happened to be browsing old poetry, and I must say this is astounding, And has inspired me to work on not only my triolet approach, but broaden the way i write poems as well. I believe this is Phenomenal. What did you place? LMK!
SAM
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Alvin, I just happened to be browsing old poetry, and I must say this is astounding, And has inspired me to work on not only my triolet approach, but broaden the way i write poems as well. I believe this is Phenomenal. What did you place? LMK!
SAM
Comment Written 13-Jun-2014
Comment from DR DIP
beautifully written Alvin I have never heard of triolet verse before and obviously you are bounded by the parameters and rules of this style. i am continually on a learning curve of new terms and styles that have presented themselves as a new reviewer coming to this site. I love to write rhyming poetry myself and feel that there is a skill to not only rhyme a poem phonetically but that it also makes sense literally.
you have ticked all boxes, congratulations
dip
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beautifully written Alvin I have never heard of triolet verse before and obviously you are bounded by the parameters and rules of this style. i am continually on a learning curve of new terms and styles that have presented themselves as a new reviewer coming to this site. I love to write rhyming poetry myself and feel that there is a skill to not only rhyme a poem phonetically but that it also makes sense literally.
you have ticked all boxes, congratulations
dip
Comment Written 10-Jun-2013
Comment from LateBloomer
Hello Alvin,
A very beautiful Triolet. I especially liked the following lines - dramatic opening:
You dwell in time that does not end
Amongst the shadows of my heart.
I wish, like willows, I could bend - (Wow! great analogy and good imagery)
As this is a contest entry, I wish you good luck.
Keep the blue waters flowing. Regards, LateBloomer
reply by the author on 26-Nov-2012
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Hello Alvin,
A very beautiful Triolet. I especially liked the following lines - dramatic opening:
You dwell in time that does not end
Amongst the shadows of my heart.
I wish, like willows, I could bend - (Wow! great analogy and good imagery)
As this is a contest entry, I wish you good luck.
Keep the blue waters flowing. Regards, LateBloomer
Comment Written 26-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 26-Nov-2012
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Thanks for a great review. I came in second in the contest.
Comment from Somer
This is a very strong poem and I think you did a very good job expressing a loss of someone and how someone dwells of stuff. Good work.
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2012
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This is a very strong poem and I think you did a very good job expressing a loss of someone and how someone dwells of stuff. Good work.
Comment Written 28-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2012
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Thanks for an excelllent review. I came in second.
Comment from Lilmerely
I love your poem. It is sad that they can't be together, but that's how love is sometimes. I like the words you rhyme and the message you transmit. Lovely poem! :)
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2012
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I love your poem. It is sad that they can't be together, but that's how love is sometimes. I like the words you rhyme and the message you transmit. Lovely poem! :)
Comment Written 03-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2012
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Thanks for an excelllent review. I came in second.
Comment from micci
I really loved your poem it so sad yet so beautiful, I loved the way it was written with such flow, the words really touched me and I thought your picture choice was dead on
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2012
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I really loved your poem it so sad yet so beautiful, I loved the way it was written with such flow, the words really touched me and I thought your picture choice was dead on
Comment Written 15-May-2012
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2012
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Thanks for a great review.
Comment from Gina513
Beautifully written.
You followed the triolet form perfectly.
So sad though, to be "forced apart" and now "grief takes your soul to rend".
Great work!
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2012
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Beautifully written.
You followed the triolet form perfectly.
So sad though, to be "forced apart" and now "grief takes your soul to rend".
Great work!
Comment Written 07-May-2012
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2012
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Thanks for understanding so well what I wanted to convey.
Comment from Helvi2
"You dwell in time that does not end....", what a beautiful beginning to a poem! The second line only reinforces those thoughts.Triolets are NOT my favorite type of poetry beacuse I've never really liked repetitive lines, but with the heartfelt words in this poem I made an exception. You really put a LOT of emotion in this short poem and that added to its power.
Congratulations on your second place tie in the Triolet contest. You deserved it my friend! :o) Nancy
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2012
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"You dwell in time that does not end....", what a beautiful beginning to a poem! The second line only reinforces those thoughts.Triolets are NOT my favorite type of poetry beacuse I've never really liked repetitive lines, but with the heartfelt words in this poem I made an exception. You really put a LOT of emotion in this short poem and that added to its power.
Congratulations on your second place tie in the Triolet contest. You deserved it my friend! :o) Nancy
Comment Written 24-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2012
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Thanks for the exceptional review and kind words.
