Night Life
Vapor4 total reviews
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
This is no where near a 5-7-5 poem which has 3 lines, the first with 5 syllables, the second with 7 syllables and the 3rd has 5. The last line is grammatically incorrect. I think there are some valuable thoughts here, but this is no where close to a 5-7-5 Poem.
This is no where near a 5-7-5 poem which has 3 lines, the first with 5 syllables, the second with 7 syllables and the 3rd has 5. The last line is grammatically incorrect. I think there are some valuable thoughts here, but this is no where close to a 5-7-5 Poem.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2011
Comment from chita
You have written a poem for the 5/7/5 contest that has three lines but your do not have the correct syllable count of 5 syllables for the first line and 7 syllable words for the second line and 5 syllables for the last line-I will be happy to review this write again when you make the necessary adjustments.
You have written a poem for the 5/7/5 contest that has three lines but your do not have the correct syllable count of 5 syllables for the first line and 7 syllable words for the second line and 5 syllables for the last line-I will be happy to review this write again when you make the necessary adjustments.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2011
Comment from ernesto escarro
Night Life
Being hurt is always for the night
time,
especially when you truly love.
Because you are aware why love hurts
and so need to be loved.
While everything is being pondered on
you are carrying all this in the night
where dream could answer you.
reply by the author on 25-Sep-2011
Night Life
Being hurt is always for the night
time,
especially when you truly love.
Because you are aware why love hurts
and so need to be loved.
While everything is being pondered on
you are carrying all this in the night
where dream could answer you.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2011
reply by the author on 25-Sep-2011
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thank u
-
welcome. God bless.
Comment from purrfect tale
I love the message about fearing to love because you're afraid you won't be loved in return. This sentence threw me: Man "just want stop doing wrong" - I'm guessing "want" isn't the word you wanted here. Technical stuff: Oooops, bet you entered the wrong contest. This was suppose to be a 5-7-5 format.
I love the message about fearing to love because you're afraid you won't be loved in return. This sentence threw me: Man "just want stop doing wrong" - I'm guessing "want" isn't the word you wanted here. Technical stuff: Oooops, bet you entered the wrong contest. This was suppose to be a 5-7-5 format.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2011