Fire
Burning wood can take many colours9 total reviews
Comment from Piggies Grandma
Your well chosen words bring very clear pictures to my minds eye. This is very well written and thought out. I enjoyed reading it very much.
Good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 19-May-2011
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Your well chosen words bring very clear pictures to my minds eye. This is very well written and thought out. I enjoyed reading it very much.
Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 19-May-2011
reply by the author on 19-May-2011
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Thank you so much!
Comment from Gungalo
Hi Almonds!!! Welcome to the site. You are gonna love it here!!!
This is a smoldering little 5/7/5 write that uses metaphor well!! I simply love that you wrote this line:
Lie in the lap of a bed
Oh my, it says so many things to me and allows me as a reader to come to my own conclusions about your analogy!!! I love this!!!
WEll done. Again, welcome!!!!
reply by the author on 19-May-2011
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Hi Almonds!!! Welcome to the site. You are gonna love it here!!!
This is a smoldering little 5/7/5 write that uses metaphor well!! I simply love that you wrote this line:
Lie in the lap of a bed
Oh my, it says so many things to me and allows me as a reader to come to my own conclusions about your analogy!!! I love this!!!
WEll done. Again, welcome!!!!
Comment Written 18-May-2011
reply by the author on 19-May-2011
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Thank you so much! For the review and the welcome! I've been here just 2 days and am already getting addicted - there's so much to read! And I really like some of the poetry and short fiction put up here. (They're way better than what you find on normal blogs)
Thank you once more!
Comment from gazzagodbod
loved it was transported to the crackling wonder of fire always amazes me how so few wonderful words can conjure up such wonderful images and feelings thank you
reply by the author on 18-May-2011
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loved it was transported to the crackling wonder of fire always amazes me how so few wonderful words can conjure up such wonderful images and feelings thank you
Comment Written 18-May-2011
reply by the author on 18-May-2011
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Thank you so much for the appreciation
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written with good form and good flow, a great job writing this short poem about the different colors of fire, i wish you the best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 18-May-2011
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this is very well written with good form and good flow, a great job writing this short poem about the different colors of fire, i wish you the best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 17-May-2011
reply by the author on 18-May-2011
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Thank you very much!
Comment from SushilaBarton
You create a sensual and charged atmosphere the structure is spot on. I love the images it creates. Simple and effective. Can't fault it as I feel it does exactly what it should.
reply by the author on 17-May-2011
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You create a sensual and charged atmosphere the structure is spot on. I love the images it creates. Simple and effective. Can't fault it as I feel it does exactly what it should.
Comment Written 17-May-2011
reply by the author on 17-May-2011
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Thank you so much! I'm so glad you could imagine it. I hadn't included a picture, contrary to what was suggested. I was hoping the lines would do it themselves...
Comment from nansghosh
Very nice lines, I liked the clear flow of words and the picturization of fire, through the words. Just one thing, not sure if fire is a 1-syllable or 2-syllable word. I checked dictionary and got varied answers. All the best, nice work.
reply by the author on 17-May-2011
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Very nice lines, I liked the clear flow of words and the picturization of fire, through the words. Just one thing, not sure if fire is a 1-syllable or 2-syllable word. I checked dictionary and got varied answers. All the best, nice work.
Comment Written 17-May-2011
reply by the author on 17-May-2011
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Thank you! Oh - it's pronounced as 'fir' - I'll check. Thanks for telling me.
Comment from WiggleJavelin
I liked the rhyme, and the imagery in the first and third line. The second line confused me however, I had to reread it a few times, it seems to neat compared to the rest, but all in all I like it. I love fire.
reply by the author on 17-May-2011
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I liked the rhyme, and the imagery in the first and third line. The second line confused me however, I had to reread it a few times, it seems to neat compared to the rest, but all in all I like it. I love fire.
Comment Written 16-May-2011
reply by the author on 17-May-2011
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Thank you! the second line refers to the lap of burning wood (logs stretched out horizontally) which inspired these lines. Probably I should have attached the picture - it was a very powerful one - where you couuld see even the details while the wood was getting charred.
Comment from quashdog
This could be read in either of two ways. It is a metaphor for hot passionate sex or sum bum started a fire when he decided to smoke in bed. Good piece of poetry.
reply by the author on 16-May-2011
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This could be read in either of two ways. It is a metaphor for hot passionate sex or sum bum started a fire when he decided to smoke in bed. Good piece of poetry.
Comment Written 16-May-2011
reply by the author on 16-May-2011
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(Blink blink) Noooo! It was inspired by a picture of burning wood - so bright, and such a wonderful picture, you could see the demarcation in the wood caused by the fire...it was such a powerful image...
but when I re-read, I can imagine it could also describe passion in bed! :P Thank you!
Comment from chita
You have good imagerty and a good flow with your Haiku-you write about how fire has many hues of red --where you write( Lie in the lap of a bed) did you mean to write "ly" just asking--nice job.
reply by the author on 16-May-2011
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You have good imagerty and a good flow with your Haiku-you write about how fire has many hues of red --where you write( Lie in the lap of a bed) did you mean to write "ly" just asking--nice job.
Comment Written 16-May-2011
reply by the author on 16-May-2011
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Thank you! I didn't quite get you - 'ly' in place of 'lie'?