Reflections For The New Day
Viewing comments for Chapter 46 "Search Your Heart"21 total reviews
Comment from kiwigirl2821
Hi Jewell,
You dance a wicked beauty of a dance with your words in this one. God is a tough subject to get to and make any sense of and yet here you write with determined effort to get your point across poetically...Well done! xoxo Kiwi
reply by the author on 13-Feb-2011
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Hi Jewell,
You dance a wicked beauty of a dance with your words in this one. God is a tough subject to get to and make any sense of and yet here you write with determined effort to get your point across poetically...Well done! xoxo Kiwi
Comment Written 13-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 13-Feb-2011
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Thanks kiwi!
Comment from Gungalo
A broken heart laid open
For all the world to view
Will find your true salvation
A flame will shine in you
I love this verse and the whole write but his verse says things that are totally wonderful. Great take on a broken heart you.
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2011
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A broken heart laid open
For all the world to view
Will find your true salvation
A flame will shine in you
I love this verse and the whole write but his verse says things that are totally wonderful. Great take on a broken heart you.
Comment Written 12-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2011
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I need to fix the meter and will do so later. It's surely killing the meter readers!! Nit thanks for reviewing anyway!
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LOL. You did say "loose rhyme no meter".
Comment from Laurie Clayton
This is a beautifully crafted free form poem (I think?) with some exceptionally evocative imagery.
I especially liked;
[But mouths of fools eat folly
Empty words and faithless ways
[A broken heart laid open
For all the world to view ]
Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2011
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This is a beautifully crafted free form poem (I think?) with some exceptionally evocative imagery.
I especially liked;
[But mouths of fools eat folly
Empty words and faithless ways
[A broken heart laid open
For all the world to view ]
Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 10-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2011
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If this weren't free form, it would suck! Lol I need to stick to no rhymes when free versing huh? I will do better, I promise
Comment from joannesnow
Beautifully written verse. Your words are well thought out. Your rhyme flows nicely to tell a message of the importance of love in our lives. Great message, enjoyable write.
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2011
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Beautifully written verse. Your words are well thought out. Your rhyme flows nicely to tell a message of the importance of love in our lives. Great message, enjoyable write.
Comment Written 10-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2011
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Hello. Thanks so much.:)
Comment from BothePo8
This is a very pretty poem about spirituality. It is clear, focused and well thought out. However, the poem lacks consistency in rhyme ( eye/find, you/truth ) and in rhythm both within stanzas and between stanzas. If you count the syllables in each line you can get the feel of this inconsistency....The first stanza has an 8/6/6/8 syllable count, the second stanza has a 8/6/8/6, the third 7/6/8/6, the fourth 7/6/8/6, the fifth 8/6/7/6, the 6th 7/7/6/6, the 7th 7/6/7/7, the 8th 8/8/8/6, the 9th 8/7/7/7, 10th 7/5/7/6 and the 11th 7/6/7/6..............These differences are not great and generally the poem flows very well but it is my belief that inconsistent rhythm is kind of like driving down a beautiful but bumpy country road. The scenery is wonderful but the bumps are distracting.....I wish you the best...Bo
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reply by the author on 10-Feb-2011
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This is a very pretty poem about spirituality. It is clear, focused and well thought out. However, the poem lacks consistency in rhyme ( eye/find, you/truth ) and in rhythm both within stanzas and between stanzas. If you count the syllables in each line you can get the feel of this inconsistency....The first stanza has an 8/6/6/8 syllable count, the second stanza has a 8/6/8/6, the third 7/6/8/6, the fourth 7/6/8/6, the fifth 8/6/7/6, the 6th 7/7/6/6, the 7th 7/6/7/7, the 8th 8/8/8/6, the 9th 8/7/7/7, 10th 7/5/7/6 and the 11th 7/6/7/6..............These differences are not great and generally the poem flows very well but it is my belief that inconsistent rhythm is kind of like driving down a beautiful but bumpy country road. The scenery is wonderful but the bumps are distracting.....I wish you the best...Bo
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 10-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2011
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To each his own opinion. Did you happen to read my comments ay the top pf the poem? Thank you fpr reading
Comment from poetbear
Love this gem.
Great use of poetic license and devices.
Great imagery and use of metaphor.
It makes sense and touches the rader.
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2011
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Love this gem.
Great use of poetic license and devices.
Great imagery and use of metaphor.
It makes sense and touches the rader.
Comment Written 10-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2011
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Thank you :)
Comment from Diny
Jj again you bless us!- bEAUTIFUL I must apologize I must have overslept Wed am. Hope you are feeling better -your poetry shows his prais ! I am touched again by your words- Forgive me for not calling and I shall try this next weekend-Mon perhaps(thats my week end)
Write on it is always a happy event to find you-Di
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2011
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Jj again you bless us!- bEAUTIFUL I must apologize I must have overslept Wed am. Hope you are feeling better -your poetry shows his prais ! I am touched again by your words- Forgive me for not calling and I shall try this next weekend-Mon perhaps(thats my week end)
Write on it is always a happy event to find you-Di
Comment Written 10-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2011
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Thanks so much Diny. I am surprised at the response to this.
Comment from amada
I like this poem on faith. It takes a different perspective to the ones I have read for the contest. I like this lines the most "Out of our hearts spring fountains Of revelations strong ."
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2011
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I like this poem on faith. It takes a different perspective to the ones I have read for the contest. I like this lines the most "Out of our hearts spring fountains Of revelations strong ."
Comment Written 10-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2011
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Thank you amada. I've not read others yet. Look forward to it though.Curious; how does it differ?
Comment from IanC
So many messages ring throughout your piece. Words of love, understanding, truth and integrity. Every stanza has its own profound message. Well done, Ian
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2011
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So many messages ring throughout your piece. Words of love, understanding, truth and integrity. Every stanza has its own profound message. Well done, Ian
Comment Written 09-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2011
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Thank you, Ian ;) God bless
Comment from LC_Cooper
I liked your strong command of this form, but being relatively new to writing poetry, I had a little trouble with the flow and meter at times. What form is it? I counted several different sets of syllables across the stanzas. Is this classified as free verse or is there a specific form? Please excuse my ignorance. I thought you did a very good job conveying the passion and sentiment of your subject. Well done!
With kind regards,
LC Cooper
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2011
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I liked your strong command of this form, but being relatively new to writing poetry, I had a little trouble with the flow and meter at times. What form is it? I counted several different sets of syllables across the stanzas. Is this classified as free verse or is there a specific form? Please excuse my ignorance. I thought you did a very good job conveying the passion and sentiment of your subject. Well done!
With kind regards,
LC Cooper
Comment Written 09-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2011
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Free form, some rhyme ....no rules . Thanks
