Reviews from

Flash Fiction

Viewing comments for Chapter 33 "Who Surprised Who?"
Collection of Flash, Micro, etc.

32 total reviews 
Comment from M. Karol
Excellent
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misunderstanding indeed. good use of all the words in such a short story. It looked complete. Had good fun reading it.
Madhvi

 Comment Written 05-May-2010

reply by the author on 06-May-2010
    M Karol,


    Thank you so much for taking the time to rad and enjoy my little story. It was fun to write and I am pleased with your encouraging response.

    Smiles, Carol
Comment from Katiesherrill
Excellent
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Good use of the contest words. They did not feel forced. I was a little confused with "the last year's haunted house", but I just assume she went to the wrong address. This was entertaining and it's a great title.

 Comment Written 05-May-2010

reply by the author on 06-May-2010
    Katie,


    Thank you so much for taking the time to rad and enjoy my little story. It was fun to write and I am pleased with your encouraging response.

    Smiles, Carol
Comment from closetpoetjester
Excellent
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Well written and superbly excecuted story and a unique entry for the contest. Flowed effortlessly and I thought the ending was a classic.
Thanks for sharing.
Good luck in the contest...

 Comment Written 05-May-2010

reply by the author on 06-May-2010
    closetpoet,


    Thank you so much for taking the time to rad and enjoy my little story. It was fun to write and I am pleased with your encouraging response.

    Smiles, Carol
Comment from patwannabe
Excellent
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Author, this is cute. I love it.

You did a magnificent job using all the words. I didn't realize it was a word contest, so you can be happy that it had a natural flow.

Well done, pat

 Comment Written 04-May-2010

reply by the author on 06-May-2010
    Pat,


    Thank you so much for taking the time to rad and enjoy my little story. It was fun to write and I am pleased with your encouraging response.

    Smiles, Carol
Comment from sugardog
Excellent
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This is a very cute and creative flash fiction story you wrote using the assigned words. I liked your snappy dialogue and thought the ending was sweet-hope she said yes. Nicely done and good luck. Dana

 Comment Written 04-May-2010

reply by the author on 06-May-2010
    Dana,


    Thank you so much for taking the time to rad and enjoy my little story. It was fun to write and I am pleased with your encouraging response.

    Smiles, Carol
Comment from Helen Tan
Excellent
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Good luck in the contest.

"I'm pregnant."
Red wine spewed across the table. I collapsed in inconsolable tears.
I like this dialogue, action and reaction in at fast speed. It's required when you're writing with such a tight word count.

Black linen draped the furniture. A skeleton dangled nearby.
Well she did wish him to rot in hell - this would be a close imitation of hell.

"What? ... Last year's haunted house?" Laughing, James pointed at the house next door.
Good twist.

A pink arrow made of wood read, Will you marry me?
Nice touch. I'm sure she said yes.

 Comment Written 04-May-2010

reply by the author on 06-May-2010
    Helen.


    Thank you so much for taking the time to rad and enjoy my little story. It was fun to write and I am pleased with your encouraging response.

    Smiles, Carol
Comment from Belinda
Excellent
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Ha-ha, humorous yet romantic. And a happy ending, of course. He got the hint wrong, but ended it right. Or is he just being very creative? Anyway, nice read.

 Comment Written 04-May-2010

reply by the author on 06-May-2010
    Belinda.


    Thank you so much for taking the time to rad and enjoy my little story. It was fun to write and I am pleased with your encouraging response.

    Smiles, Carol
Comment from Aislinge
Excellent
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Neat story! Flash fiction is tough enough, and a 150-word limit would be even more challenging, not to mention a required word list. Well done!

Thank you for a great read!

 Comment Written 04-May-2010

reply by the author on 06-May-2010
    Aislinge,


    Thank you so much for taking the time to rad and enjoy my little story. It was fun to write and I am pleased with your encouraging response.

    Smiles, Carol
Comment from Juliette Chamberlain
Excellent
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You have made excellent use of the prescribed words, and built a very believable story.
I liked James's romantic gesture which almost came unstuck when 'she' went to the wrong house.


Juliette

 Comment Written 04-May-2010

reply by the author on 06-May-2010
    Juliette,


    Thank you so much for taking the time to rad and enjoy my little story. It was fun to write and I am pleased with your encouraging response.

    Smiles, Carol
Comment from Thesis
Excellent
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An interesting use of the prompt words. I liked the story and your description of the pregnancy issue, gone bad. James could have handled that much better. It's a good thing she was forgiving. - Thesis

 Comment Written 04-May-2010

reply by the author on 06-May-2010
    John,


    Thank you so much for taking the time to rad and enjoy my little story. It was fun to write and I am pleased with your encouraging response.

    Smiles, Carol