Comment from Helvi2

Excellent

Hi BG,
I'm not sure if this is a true haiku,because of the punctuation and the first two lines should read together as one, but the heartfelt words you wrote over ride those faults ( which I could be wrong about). I think the picture you chose was a perfect choice for the imagery you presented and the precious gift you were given
I'm so happy for you and your son. I'm still smiling knowing a miracle happened for both of you.

Good Luck in the Contest,
Helvi :o)

 Comment Written 27-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 27-Oct-2009

Helvi

I never know the exact rules so I just wrote what was in my heart. I am glad that you enjoyed it. Smiles, Carol

reply by Helvi2 on 27-Oct-2009

I think it was wonderful!
Hugs, Helvi

Comment from --Turtle.

Excellent

Hi Carol

I think a lot of people will get a gushy feeling for this, as it is warm and the instinct of parenting is strong. I thought it was good. I did think the he lives didn't hit me with the flow so well. Like there might be something to brainstorm, as the final thought? subtle, but warming? ... baby cries, a gift.

baby cries, perfect.... music...

Not sure. the baby cries kind of implies life, so he lives to me felt a fizzle.

But I'm not sure as I am not that good with poems.

 Comment Written 27-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 27-Oct-2009

turtle

Guess you actually had to be there in the moment to get the impact of he lives. They said he wouldn't survive. When I heard his cry...I knew he was alive. If you think of a better way of putting it...I am always open to your suggestions. Thanks, Carol

reply by --Turtle. on 27-Oct-2009

true joy?

I try. Take care, --Turtle.

Comment from medicnate

Excellent

Great work here. This is a very sweet poem, with a happy ending. Great picture you chose. Good luck in the contest.

~medicnate~

 Comment Written 27-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 27-Oct-2009

medicante

Thank you so much for your kind words. This one meant a lot to me. Carol

reply by medicnate on 27-Oct-2009

No problem. If you have the chance, and haven't done so already, I'd love to hear your thoughts on my short stories "She Danced in Silence" and "Quilty as Charged". Mind you, they are horror stories, so if that's not your thing, I completely understand. Thanks in advance.

~medicnate~

Comment from skye

Excellent

There is nothing more compelling than the first cry of a newborn... it truly starts our heart, and then fills it overflowing with more love than we can know.
Your haiku is strong, imaginative, well constructed, and fits all the requirements.
Very well done.
Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 27-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 27-Oct-2009

Skye

Thanks for the kind comments. My son was four months old and the doctors said he had very little chance of survival. I was blessed when God had other plans...Thanks again. Carol

Comment from Mrs Happy Poet

Excellent

Yes starts of sad and ends beautifully a very created contest entry well done a strong contest entry enhanced by the art work good luck regards Fuller

 Comment Written 27-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 27-Oct-2009

Fuller

Thank you very much. I was blessed when God had other plans when the doctors thought he was going to die. Smiles, Carol

Comment from cardpackrat

Excellent

Thank god that your child lives. There have been many a mother who has gone through this as well. A perfect haiku that expresses fully a parent's prayer for the health of their child. Good luck with this in the contest.

 Comment Written 27-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 27-Oct-2009

Thanks you for your kind comments. I truly appreciate them. Smiles, CArol

Comment from Carol D Parker

Excellent

This is a very profound haiku. I presume
it is a birth situation. You said so much in
these few words. very well written and creative.
It should do well in the comp.
Good luck
Delora

 Comment Written 27-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 27-Oct-2009

Delora

He was actually four months old and had to have an experimental surgery on his brain. WE were military and the prognosis was about zero. I was blessed when he came back cooing and aahing. I can't describe the emotions I felt. Thanks! CArol

Comment from Bananafish308

Excellent

This is such a touching and powerful haiku. I was so relieved when I read the third line and author notes. I am happy all turned out well. Very well done. Bill

 Comment Written 27-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 27-Oct-2009

Bill

I was very fortunate and blessed when Johnny survived. Thanks for the kind review. Carol

Comment from becky7777

Excellent

so glad your son did live and God choose to let him. great haiku. it is full of emotion and a happy picture. good luck in the contets.
Becky

 Comment Written 27-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 27-Oct-2009

Becky

Yes, we were blessed when he survived. Thank you for the kind review. CArol

Comment from TheBritsWife

Excellent

Hi Carol, This is such a powerful and heartfelt haiku! You are such a lovely person, and you've been through so much in your life. I loved the way you captured a true miracle in so few words. The picture you chose is perfect, although your touching poem certainly speaks for itself. You were truly blessed! Good luck in the contest. This is a special entry. - Karen :-)

 Comment Written 27-Oct-2009

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reply by the author on 27-Oct-2009

Karen

Thank you again. I am thinking about reposting a book I started about Johnny. I didn't finish it because the writing was difficult. There are a lot of new people who haven't read it and maybe this time I can finish it. Still thinking on it thought. Smiles to you, CArol

reply by TheBritsWife on 27-Oct-2009

Hey Carol! My vote is for the re-posting of your son's story! I'm sure there will be many people (myself included) who will really relate and be touched by it.
Karen ;-)