Reviews from

Breeze

clarity poem (please see author notes)

16 total reviews 
Comment from babylonia
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

nicely done. easy to read and follow. no spaggies. imagery is excellent. great picture as well.
"mysterious, unseen presence"
definitely a good one.
good luck~
love,
barbara

 Comment Written 03-Oct-2009

reply by the author on 03-Oct-2009
    Hi babylonia,
    Thank you for taking a look at BREEZE. I appreciate your kind remarks. Am glad you liked it and I'm grateful for the *****s. Cheers, Whizpurr ^-^
reply by babylonia on 03-Oct-2009
    you are very welcome~
    love,
    barbara
Comment from Judian James
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Wow, it's been a long time since I've read or written a clarity piece. This is excellent whizpurr!! Your center bit is especially good but I don't think "wind's" needs the apostrophe. well done

 Comment Written 02-Oct-2009

reply by the author on 02-Oct-2009
    Hi Jude,
    Glad you enjoyed this one. Thanks for reading, rating and for noticing that winds needs no apostrophe. I changed it. Your help is appreciated. Hugs, Whizpurr ^-^
Comment from Amfunny
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Nothing like a good breeze... unless it is a gassy one. LOL. Well done, my friend. I liked the way you described it as air's soft kiss. Very well done.

 Comment Written 02-Oct-2009

reply by the author on 02-Oct-2009
    Hi amfunny,
    Thank you for enjoying my Breeze poem... yes, this time it was fresh air, not foul! ;-) Glad you enjoyed!
    Hugs, Whizpurr ^-^
Comment from Gert sherwood
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hello whizpurr ^-^
Now I like how you tell us of the mysterious winds
and it's ebbs.
Give me a breeze that touches you with a soft kisses.

Gert



 Comment Written 02-Oct-2009

reply by the author on 02-Oct-2009
    Hi Gert,
    Thank you. Yes, I prefer those soft kiss breezes too, they are so much more comfy than the blasts from the north.
    Appreciate your kind comments.
    Cheers,
    Whizpurr ^-^
Comment from sgalletti
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi Whiz! I'm reviewing all of the entries in this particular contest before voting. You have written a great clarity poem. All syllable count is correct and you have provided some beautiful imagery. Best of luck in the contest. Do want to point out that I think your poem would have been even better if you had left all the punctuation (,.?) out... Sue

 Comment Written 02-Oct-2009

reply by the author on 02-Oct-2009
    Hi Sue,
    Another fun contest. Your kind review is appreciated. I wondered about leaving the punctuation out and see that most of the other poems are without punctuation. Next time I try a clarity, I will remember your advice. It seems more and more poetry is appearing that is entirely unpunctuated. I'm okay with this, but do wonder why?
    Change in the weather here... tonight the forecast is for a mix of rain and snow... brrrr. Was nice and sunny today though. Have a great evening. Hugs, Whizpurr ^-^
Comment from Soulester
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I like it! I like it! Not only did you choose precise vocabulary, but your rhyme really adds to this clarity pyramid's flow. Great job! Mary

 Comment Written 02-Oct-2009

reply by the author on 03-Oct-2009
    Hi Soulester,
    Thanks for your kind comments. I had fun trying to write about such a nebulous subject as a breeze! :-) Glad you liked my little clarity poem.
    Cheers, Whizpurr ^-^
Comment from dmjones
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Excellent choice of words and loved the image you choose to go with it. I'm far from a judge of poetry but I like this one. Best of Luck.

 Comment Written 02-Oct-2009

reply by the author on 03-Oct-2009
    Hello dm,
    Thank you for reading my little clarity poem. I'm pleased that you enjoyed it. Your kind review is appreciated.
    Cheers,
    Whizpurr ^-^
Comment from fionageorge
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A strong entry in this competition with a good flow. I especially loved the 'Air's soft kiss'. Strong entry. Congratulations.

 Comment Written 02-Oct-2009

reply by the author on 03-Oct-2009
    Hi fiona,
    Thanks for your kind review. It was a fun contest and it produced some wonderful poems. I really enjoyed trying a clarity poem, a nice exercise. Your comments were appreciated.
    Cheers,
    Whizpurr ^-^
Comment from becky7777
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

interesting take on breeze. I like how you have described it. great clarity pyramid poem, great choice good luck in the contest.
Becky

 Comment Written 02-Oct-2009

reply by the author on 03-Oct-2009
    Hi becky,
    Thanks for your kind comments re: Breeze. It was fun to have a go at writing a clarity poem. The contest surely prompted some great entries. Reminded me of what a talented group of poets there are here on this site.
    Cheers,
    Whizpurr ^-^
Comment from Annelisa
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Well done clarity pyramid. The format is correct. "Source of zephyr's ebb" is a great line. Good luck in the contest! Annelisa

 Comment Written 01-Oct-2009

reply by the author on 03-Oct-2009
    Hi Annelisa.
    I thank you for your kind review. It was an interesting contest and I had fun trying to describe such an illusive 'creature' as a breeze! :-) Hugs, Whizpurr ^-^