CSP: A Collection of Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 92 "Paris"A collection of poetry
57 total reviews
Comment from KYPollard/El Gato
I enjoyed reading your poem. It is well written with no spags noted. It was my pleasure to read about Paris. One day I hope to go.
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I enjoyed reading your poem. It is well written with no spags noted. It was my pleasure to read about Paris. One day I hope to go.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2009
Comment from AlvinTEthington
A wonderful description of Paris. Good use of the abab rhyme scheme--it's hard to write a rhyme scheme for a bilingual poem, as the pronunciations in French are often different from the ones in English, but you did a stellar job. Good juxtaposition of picture and poem.
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2009
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A wonderful description of Paris. Good use of the abab rhyme scheme--it's hard to write a rhyme scheme for a bilingual poem, as the pronunciations in French are often different from the ones in English, but you did a stellar job. Good juxtaposition of picture and poem.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2009
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2009
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It was a strange thing trying to rhyme up a couple of those French words with the English. Tricky - ha! Thank you for your review and kind remarks. Regards, Sue
Comment from debskatz
Hi Sixteezkid,
Ah, Paris! Darn it, never been, but you make it sound like the place to go!
Only problem I have with it is that some of your rhyming couplets are questionable. "beauty" & "gently" are not true rhymes at all. Neither is "descends" & "Seine." "Dame" & "Christiandom" I suppose it depends on how you pronounce it; however, the way I pronounce them both, they don't rhyme. Same way with "again" and "forgotten."
Still a beautiful poem that gets across your love of Paris. But you might want to rhyme a bit better next time. imho.
smiles,
deb
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Hi Sixteezkid,
Ah, Paris! Darn it, never been, but you make it sound like the place to go!
Only problem I have with it is that some of your rhyming couplets are questionable. "beauty" & "gently" are not true rhymes at all. Neither is "descends" & "Seine." "Dame" & "Christiandom" I suppose it depends on how you pronounce it; however, the way I pronounce them both, they don't rhyme. Same way with "again" and "forgotten."
Still a beautiful poem that gets across your love of Paris. But you might want to rhyme a bit better next time. imho.
smiles,
deb
Comment Written 20-Jan-2009
Comment from dportwood
I have never seen the beauty of Paris since my life has been spent in the US. Obviously, you have enjoyed your time there and have written about it nicely in this poem.
Duane
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I have never seen the beauty of Paris since my life has been spent in the US. Obviously, you have enjoyed your time there and have written about it nicely in this poem.
Duane
Comment Written 20-Jan-2009
Comment from JoAnna Lee
I think we all feel a bit of wander-lust as cabin fever sets in during the dead of winter. Nice rhyming and rhythm and descriptions.
Thanks for sharing,
Donna
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I think we all feel a bit of wander-lust as cabin fever sets in during the dead of winter. Nice rhyming and rhythm and descriptions.
Thanks for sharing,
Donna
Comment Written 20-Jan-2009
Comment from mmichelle97219
It is a very good poem. The only thing that would make it better would be some sensory details such as smelling the cafes, feeling the crowds as they push by. But as it is I liked it too.
Happy writing
Michelle
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It is a very good poem. The only thing that would make it better would be some sensory details such as smelling the cafes, feeling the crowds as they push by. But as it is I liked it too.
Happy writing
Michelle
Comment Written 20-Jan-2009
Comment from grassroots08
I have never been to Paris. Heck, I've hardly been out of my own house. Now I have seen Paris thanks to you!! This was a good piece that you have crafted and it appears you have coverd well the landscape, LOL Cheers, Don (grassroots08)
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I have never been to Paris. Heck, I've hardly been out of my own house. Now I have seen Paris thanks to you!! This was a good piece that you have crafted and it appears you have coverd well the landscape, LOL Cheers, Don (grassroots08)
Comment Written 20-Jan-2009
Comment from Adri7enne
Ah, you bring back memories of my three days in Paris, many many years ago. The louvre, Notre Dame, Paris by night, the Folies Bergeres, Ah, Paris. You make me want to go back.
And your little phrase:" Mais oui-bien sur!" You make me nostalgic for the city of lights. Thanks for the memories, as Bob Hope would have said. Good job.
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Ah, you bring back memories of my three days in Paris, many many years ago. The louvre, Notre Dame, Paris by night, the Folies Bergeres, Ah, Paris. You make me want to go back.
And your little phrase:" Mais oui-bien sur!" You make me nostalgic for the city of lights. Thanks for the memories, as Bob Hope would have said. Good job.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2009
Comment from Juleeann
I too love Paris and have written about it a couple of times here on FS "Under The Bridges" and "An American In Paris" are the most recent ones in my portfolio.
Once again, I loved this and you've described it here like I was walking down the street with you.
Carry on and God bless,
Juleeann
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2009
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I too love Paris and have written about it a couple of times here on FS "Under The Bridges" and "An American In Paris" are the most recent ones in my portfolio.
Once again, I loved this and you've described it here like I was walking down the street with you.
Carry on and God bless,
Juleeann
Comment Written 20-Jan-2009
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2009
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From someone who has walked those streets and written about it, I most certainly count this an added bonus! And to get your most esteemed review is such an honor! I am so happy that you enjoyed this poem of a city we both love! I am honored and thank you from my heart. With warmest regards, Sue
Comment from womanwriter
The only thing your poem leaves me to desire is the freshly baked breads and the wonderful tastes of the wines.
Very well done.
Thank you so much for sharing.
Sincerely,
Womanwriter
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The only thing your poem leaves me to desire is the freshly baked breads and the wonderful tastes of the wines.
Very well done.
Thank you so much for sharing.
Sincerely,
Womanwriter
Comment Written 20-Jan-2009