The Ripple Effect
Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "The Building of Ugly"A couple's tour about England takes many turns....
5 total reviews
Comment from Nicole Alexander
Nice imagery and good straight talk of comversation. It read smooth enough. Too bad i have missed a lot of it. But from what you wrote here, I really like it. Good luck.
Hugs, Nicole
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013
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Nice imagery and good straight talk of comversation. It read smooth enough. Too bad i have missed a lot of it. But from what you wrote here, I really like it. Good luck.
Hugs, Nicole
Comment Written 10-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013
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Thanks for the review.... it ended up somehow in poetry category along with a few other chapters.... I changed it..... thanks...for taking the time to read......... Bill
Comment from mumsyone
This story is far too long to be presented as a poem of any kind. I hope you can change the category to fiction, or whatever.
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013
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This story is far too long to be presented as a poem of any kind. I hope you can change the category to fiction, or whatever.
Comment Written 10-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013
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Thanks for the review.... it ended up somehow in poetry category along with a few other chapters.... I changed it..... thanks...for taking the time to read......... Bill
Comment from Earl of Oxford
This is miles too long for a thorough read and constructive review.
It also has no poetic devices to classify it as 'poetry', and in my quick browse, it seems like a story written in prose.
Free verse should have certain poetic elements, IMHO, like occasional rhyme, alliteration, metaphors, vivid imagery, and perhaps a little dramatic repetition.
Best wishes, Ray
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013
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This is miles too long for a thorough read and constructive review.
It also has no poetic devices to classify it as 'poetry', and in my quick browse, it seems like a story written in prose.
Free verse should have certain poetic elements, IMHO, like occasional rhyme, alliteration, metaphors, vivid imagery, and perhaps a little dramatic repetition.
Best wishes, Ray
Comment Written 10-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jan-2013
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Thanks for the review Ray.... yes it's a story...it ended up somehow in poetry category along with a few other chapters.... I changed it..... thanks...for taking the time to read.........and your comments
I had to chuckle when I saw your pen name... I too am related to the Earl...Yep he is the real deal and not that other phony baloney guy, whats his name...Anyway you take care and thanks for the review...
Bill or should I say
signed, Anonymous
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Thanks for your great fun reply, Bill.
I still haven't seen the film, but am looking forward to it.
Cheers, Ray
Comment from Carol Johnson
Very creative and interesting. I laughed out loud at this line
"Well of course I'm sure. Why else would I call you Pilot?"
Wonderful use of dialogue and this easily kept my interest.
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2009
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Very creative and interesting. I laughed out loud at this line
"Well of course I'm sure. Why else would I call you Pilot?"
Wonderful use of dialogue and this easily kept my interest.
Comment Written 31-Jan-2009
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2009
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Gee, I just saw this Carol, please forgive the delay... I have not been on Fanstory for awhile.. It was fun to write this as well and I thank you for the stars and nice review... Bill
Comment from Kym Jade
Hmm, it seems a nice holiday is about to go all wrong for our friends in England.You did well to create a couple of detestable creeps.
Did you mean Long John Silver or was it a play on words?
Barbed wire had scared<(scarred) his cheek as a child just below his left eye
A night of going drag proved once again to be a frustrating evening as not once was he asked to dance or let alone, not one future bit of rough offered to lit(light) his cigar.
Other wise(otherwise) you can just take your sorry ass back to your little flat and prance about."
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2008
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Hmm, it seems a nice holiday is about to go all wrong for our friends in England.You did well to create a couple of detestable creeps.
Did you mean Long John Silver or was it a play on words?
Barbed wire had scared<(scarred) his cheek as a child just below his left eye
A night of going drag proved once again to be a frustrating evening as not once was he asked to dance or let alone, not one future bit of rough offered to lit(light) his cigar.
Other wise(otherwise) you can just take your sorry ass back to your little flat and prance about."
Comment Written 12-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2008
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Play on words, as I always do. At time i do this, especially with you. Was two a u reading along just like a friend .... anyway thanks again... bill
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We have been waiting to hear more of the Ripple Effect for such a long time. Chin up and fingers on the keyboard.
Hugs