Foxtales From The Front Porch
Viewing comments for Chapter 14 "The Magical Mariachi Band"Stories told from the heart
6 total reviews
Comment from joan marie
Ain't life grand? Who would have ever guessed the end to this story. People should share these vacation experiences in leiu or slide shows. Great read. joan marie
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Ain't life grand? Who would have ever guessed the end to this story. People should share these vacation experiences in leiu or slide shows. Great read. joan marie
Comment Written 23-Oct-2008
Comment from ulster3
Hello foxtale.
Just clever like a fox. You liked it so now you want it and the chicken coup is all locked up. lol. I enjoyed reading this. Thanks for posting. No spag. rebecca
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Hello foxtale.
Just clever like a fox. You liked it so now you want it and the chicken coup is all locked up. lol. I enjoyed reading this. Thanks for posting. No spag. rebecca
Comment Written 23-Oct-2008
Comment from c_lucas
Take it up with the pencil pushers. No frills. No thrills. A very well written short story that held my interest. Good imagery and descriptive scheme.
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Take it up with the pencil pushers. No frills. No thrills. A very well written short story that held my interest. Good imagery and descriptive scheme.
Comment Written 23-Oct-2008
Comment from WordPainter
Well written. I enjoyed the humor of this. One suggestion for the ending:
"Oh.
Well, I still think it is cheap...."
Speaker had not expressed that he thought it was cheap previously, so using "still think it is cheap" seems not quite what you may have been wanting to express here. Maybe something like:
"Oh.
Well, in that case I think it is cheap..."
It's your call, just a thought that came to mind as I read.
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Well written. I enjoyed the humor of this. One suggestion for the ending:
"Oh.
Well, I still think it is cheap...."
Speaker had not expressed that he thought it was cheap previously, so using "still think it is cheap" seems not quite what you may have been wanting to express here. Maybe something like:
"Oh.
Well, in that case I think it is cheap..."
It's your call, just a thought that came to mind as I read.
Comment Written 23-Oct-2008
Comment from Nightwind1
This is a cute story. I hope the band got paid for the gas to get back and forth. I never went to Mexico, but I loved Hawaii. The lei greeting is lovely.
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This is a cute story. I hope the band got paid for the gas to get back and forth. I never went to Mexico, but I loved Hawaii. The lei greeting is lovely.
Comment Written 23-Oct-2008
Comment from brightside1099
This is cute. I guess the cruise line thought you would be impressed enough by the location. In all actuality, I'm surprised there wasn't one there anyway, playing for donations by the rich cruise patrons. Nice story. A couple of extra commas needed ...
to Mexico(,) we arrived
All of a sudden(,) the
Then(,) with a roar of the engine(,) the minivan lurched off,
BB
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2008
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This is cute. I guess the cruise line thought you would be impressed enough by the location. In all actuality, I'm surprised there wasn't one there anyway, playing for donations by the rich cruise patrons. Nice story. A couple of extra commas needed ...
to Mexico(,) we arrived
All of a sudden(,) the
Then(,) with a roar of the engine(,) the minivan lurched off,
BB
Comment Written 23-Oct-2008
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2008
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commas. ok ok. You are right.... but hey, I was on vacation. LOL
