Tonight
Lost among love38 total reviews
Comment from PUPA
dkrld, in your first line, there was this yearning and longing, followed by the rest of the poem, filled with pain, dissappointment, hurt and a lot of anger. It kept surmounting to reach a sad ending. You have a very special way of expressing feelings that I find very effective, it reaches the reader quite strongly.
Great job, I enjoyed reading it very much.
Love
Pupa
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2008
dkrld, in your first line, there was this yearning and longing, followed by the rest of the poem, filled with pain, dissappointment, hurt and a lot of anger. It kept surmounting to reach a sad ending. You have a very special way of expressing feelings that I find very effective, it reaches the reader quite strongly.
Great job, I enjoyed reading it very much.
Love
Pupa
Comment Written 23-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2008
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Thank you so very much for the kind review...dklrd
Comment from cheyennewy
Hi Dklrdmcches.....this is a gut wrenching tale about a love that has gone terribly wrong. You wrote this well as in reading it I felt a deep sympathy which is the sign that the writer has done his job. Well done....chey
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2008
Hi Dklrdmcches.....this is a gut wrenching tale about a love that has gone terribly wrong. You wrote this well as in reading it I felt a deep sympathy which is the sign that the writer has done his job. Well done....chey
Comment Written 23-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2008
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thank you so very much for the kind review...dklrd
Comment from chaoticist
This was great, the feeling, the searching, replay of your choices and forgotten moments. A lesson learned, but there is no will to judge it, to condemn this action, though superficial in purpose, the feeling is brought up from a much deeper point. I must say you are impressing me. Much anger in this one, he will fall to the dark side...
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2008
This was great, the feeling, the searching, replay of your choices and forgotten moments. A lesson learned, but there is no will to judge it, to condemn this action, though superficial in purpose, the feeling is brought up from a much deeper point. I must say you are impressing me. Much anger in this one, he will fall to the dark side...
Comment Written 23-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2008
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thank you so very much for the kind review...dklrd
Comment from Dan Berdick
This is a good read about a guy who lost his supposed love, I enjoyed the dark poem about the heartache the guy felt, not that I like that, It was just a good read. Thanks, Dan
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2008
This is a good read about a guy who lost his supposed love, I enjoyed the dark poem about the heartache the guy felt, not that I like that, It was just a good read. Thanks, Dan
Comment Written 23-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2008
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thank you so very much for the kind review...dklrd
Comment from Godfrey
Dklrdmcches A very old story about the hurts and disappointments of life. You have done a great job here. The All Time Best as proof of that. Good job. Interesting read. G
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2008
Dklrdmcches A very old story about the hurts and disappointments of life. You have done a great job here. The All Time Best as proof of that. Good job. Interesting read. G
Comment Written 23-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2008
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thank you very much...dklrd
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You are most welcome. Enjoy your day. G
Comment from Nanny 6
Wow! Am I correct in assuming that the guy killed himself because he fell in love with this woman who cheated on him? You really do have talent at telling a story in a poem, my friend. Judy
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2008
Wow! Am I correct in assuming that the guy killed himself because he fell in love with this woman who cheated on him? You really do have talent at telling a story in a poem, my friend. Judy
Comment Written 23-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2008
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thank you for the review...dklrd
Comment from Kentucky Sweet Pea
This is an excellent post, Dk. You perfectly express the feelings one feels when they lose out on the love of a lifetime and are suddenly thrust into solitude. Solid construction and great word choices.
Sweet Pea
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2008
This is an excellent post, Dk. You perfectly express the feelings one feels when they lose out on the love of a lifetime and are suddenly thrust into solitude. Solid construction and great word choices.
Sweet Pea
Comment Written 23-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 24-Apr-2008
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thank you very much for the kind review...dklrd
Comment from EKPoet
This poem is full of vivid, emotional images and a tense, tightly strung voice, and it is a very well done, sophisticated piece. There is quite alot of music in the rhymes, and off rhymes, used here. the repetitions of 'tonight' in the last stanza drive home the desperation, the earnestness of the emotion in the narrator. the light and dark of the nature of love is laid bare here, and the poet does it skill and eloquence. "A man is broken, beaten, and out of choices" "Tonight i dont want to love, or dance, or even cry" these are all marvelous lines and display your talent and knowledge of the art form EKPoet
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2008
This poem is full of vivid, emotional images and a tense, tightly strung voice, and it is a very well done, sophisticated piece. There is quite alot of music in the rhymes, and off rhymes, used here. the repetitions of 'tonight' in the last stanza drive home the desperation, the earnestness of the emotion in the narrator. the light and dark of the nature of love is laid bare here, and the poet does it skill and eloquence. "A man is broken, beaten, and out of choices" "Tonight i dont want to love, or dance, or even cry" these are all marvelous lines and display your talent and knowledge of the art form EKPoet
Comment Written 22-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2008
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thank you for the sweet and very kind review, I greatly appreciate it...dklrd
Comment from bard owl
This poem has very vivid imagery and emotions. The words are burning with hurt and you take the reader for a bitter ride make an account of the many hurtful wounds that love has inflicted in your heart. The last verse is truly, truly sad. Excellent writing. Blessings, bard owl
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2008
This poem has very vivid imagery and emotions. The words are burning with hurt and you take the reader for a bitter ride make an account of the many hurtful wounds that love has inflicted in your heart. The last verse is truly, truly sad. Excellent writing. Blessings, bard owl
Comment Written 22-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2008
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thank you so very much for such a great review...dklrd
Comment from Victoria...
This is a very depressing poem. People need to love again, and get through this wonderful life.
As poetry, it's mostly good. You have all four line stanzas except the 3rd, which is five lines. I don't think you need "Tonight, I don't want to love, dance, or even cry". You are just telling me, rather than showing me, as you do in most of the rest of the poem. That would bring it down to four lines.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2008
This is a very depressing poem. People need to love again, and get through this wonderful life.
As poetry, it's mostly good. You have all four line stanzas except the 3rd, which is five lines. I don't think you need "Tonight, I don't want to love, dance, or even cry". You are just telling me, rather than showing me, as you do in most of the rest of the poem. That would bring it down to four lines.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2008
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2008
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thank you for the fine review...dklrd