Oh Life!
Viewing comments for Chapter 19 "Ethics!"Experiences of living
65 total reviews
Comment from Patty Palmer
I started to read your poem. It got longer and longer until I finally decided I was losing track of what I had already read. Finally, I stopped reading altogether
Please don't take this in a mean way but when it's too long people lose interest and you won't get a fair review for your work.
Patty
  |
I started to read your poem. It got longer and longer until I finally decided I was losing track of what I had already read. Finally, I stopped reading altogether
Please don't take this in a mean way but when it's too long people lose interest and you won't get a fair review for your work.
Patty
Comment Written 09-Jun-2021
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Ethics!
by Alcreator Litt Dear
How can you afford to promote all your poems so high? You're either spending a lot of time reviewing or buying with cash.
Nice free verse about this and that and how we exist in our own world of illusions. A very unique poem and interesting wording.
|
Ethics!
by Alcreator Litt Dear
How can you afford to promote all your poems so high? You're either spending a lot of time reviewing or buying with cash.
Nice free verse about this and that and how we exist in our own world of illusions. A very unique poem and interesting wording.
Comment Written 09-Jun-2021
Comment from Carlos' girl
This is just beautiful. You certainly did a fine job combining various styles as described in your authors notes. It reads very well and it is flawless. It held my attention from beginning to end. Very nice
 |
This is just beautiful. You certainly did a fine job combining various styles as described in your authors notes. It reads very well and it is flawless. It held my attention from beginning to end. Very nice
Comment Written 09-Jun-2021
Comment from royowen
To raise a child in the way they should go, and when they are old they will not depart from it. Some people don't know how to raise their kids, they weren't shown how, children, at least initially depend on their formative years for guidance. But the choice is still theirs as to which road to take. Well done, blessings Roy
|
To raise a child in the way they should go, and when they are old they will not depart from it. Some people don't know how to raise their kids, they weren't shown how, children, at least initially depend on their formative years for guidance. But the choice is still theirs as to which road to take. Well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 09-Jun-2021
Comment from closetpoetjester
On the contrary I disagree. I think this book is about God and for God and those few who understand you, although I'm not sure who they are. From where I'm sitting, you seem to talk down to those who apparently don't walk in the shoes of Christianity and perhaps insult some of those who do.
I'm not sure God would speak like all the respective lines in your poem. Are you of the opinion that you are of some higher heavenly intelligence Mr Almighty?
If I was bordering on becoming a born again Christian at any point and happened to read this prior to my decision, I think this would have me heading for the hills. This EPIC write is far too long, you could have summed up your point with these words.
I love God, but I'll spread
whatever religious jibber I want AND
I write what I like.
All in God's name of course
It's MY perogative...oh, and God's.
Sensibility, rationality, relevance matters not
As long as I can manage to insult the average
person's intelligence when I write about God
with MANY spags, well, hey...
if they claim not to understand
then it is THEY who are the ignorant ones
The words ARROGANT and SELF RIGHTEOUS
appear nowhere in my dictionary...or God's.
AMEN
I actually wonder what all the decent Christians think of this write. I might think they'd be just the teenciest bit insulted. Well I suggest you take this line in your poem and live by that one with your future writes...and I quote:
"Love family, neighbours, country and mankind"
Try a bit more brevity in your work. Most people would have skimmed through this or bailed out after the third paragraph. Anyone that read, understood this in its completion and then bravoed you needs to take a serious look at their integrity.
Please try and take some of the criticisms being pelted at you left, right and center on board.
I won't say "Well done" as this, infact was very badly done and needs a huge revisit and massive edit.
Try to get to the crux of things a little quicker.
You have endless spags too...shouldn't God be helping you out a bit. Maybe say an extra prayer before your next write. Good luck.
Cheers
 |
On the contrary I disagree. I think this book is about God and for God and those few who understand you, although I'm not sure who they are. From where I'm sitting, you seem to talk down to those who apparently don't walk in the shoes of Christianity and perhaps insult some of those who do.
I'm not sure God would speak like all the respective lines in your poem. Are you of the opinion that you are of some higher heavenly intelligence Mr Almighty?
If I was bordering on becoming a born again Christian at any point and happened to read this prior to my decision, I think this would have me heading for the hills. This EPIC write is far too long, you could have summed up your point with these words.
I love God, but I'll spread
whatever religious jibber I want AND
I write what I like.
All in God's name of course
It's MY perogative...oh, and God's.
Sensibility, rationality, relevance matters not
As long as I can manage to insult the average
person's intelligence when I write about God
with MANY spags, well, hey...
if they claim not to understand
then it is THEY who are the ignorant ones
The words ARROGANT and SELF RIGHTEOUS
appear nowhere in my dictionary...or God's.
AMEN
I actually wonder what all the decent Christians think of this write. I might think they'd be just the teenciest bit insulted. Well I suggest you take this line in your poem and live by that one with your future writes...and I quote:
"Love family, neighbours, country and mankind"
Try a bit more brevity in your work. Most people would have skimmed through this or bailed out after the third paragraph. Anyone that read, understood this in its completion and then bravoed you needs to take a serious look at their integrity.
Please try and take some of the criticisms being pelted at you left, right and center on board.
I won't say "Well done" as this, infact was very badly done and needs a huge revisit and massive edit.
Try to get to the crux of things a little quicker.
You have endless spags too...shouldn't God be helping you out a bit. Maybe say an extra prayer before your next write. Good luck.
Cheers
Comment Written 20-Mar-2013
Comment from dmt1967
This is a nice poem just maybe a tad too long in my opinion though I like the thinking behind it but it was very hard going for me thank you for sharing
|
This is a nice poem just maybe a tad too long in my opinion though I like the thinking behind it but it was very hard going for me thank you for sharing
Comment Written 20-Mar-2013
Comment from Selina Stambi
I liked the last seven lines. They were simple, comforting and made sense.
This poem wound on like an epic and it was hard to keep focused.
lames limp? I think you are referring to limping lame people?
Perhaps, if you re-wrote in the vein of the last lines ...?
|
I liked the last seven lines. They were simple, comforting and made sense.
This poem wound on like an epic and it was hard to keep focused.
lames limp? I think you are referring to limping lame people?
Perhaps, if you re-wrote in the vein of the last lines ...?
Comment Written 19-Mar-2013
Comment from Curtis Hatch
Alcreator,
The work is written well using the metaphor to disguise the underlying meanings. There are natural laws, as the poem points out, are part of the order of the universe. I enjoyed the read and the thoughts it provoked.
Curtis
|
Alcreator,
The work is written well using the metaphor to disguise the underlying meanings. There are natural laws, as the poem points out, are part of the order of the universe. I enjoyed the read and the thoughts it provoked.
Curtis
Comment Written 18-Mar-2013
Comment from ravenblack
again, I like some of what you are saying but as I continue to scale down this massive poem, I forget what I read a few lines ago as it all just gets lost in incomprehensible ramblings. scale down and exert more control over your work.
|
again, I like some of what you are saying but as I continue to scale down this massive poem, I forget what I read a few lines ago as it all just gets lost in incomprehensible ramblings. scale down and exert more control over your work.
Comment Written 18-Mar-2013
Comment from allborn66
This is a very interesting piece. I like the dialogue format. The word choice is very strong, and your theme is well-communicated.
Barbara
|
This is a very interesting piece. I like the dialogue format. The word choice is very strong, and your theme is well-communicated.
Barbara
Comment Written 18-Mar-2013
