Emerald Isle
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Emerald Isle"Invitation to Paradise
15 total reviews
Comment from eliz100
What a wonderful idea. I would very much like to be a part of this process If you will have me. This is an excellent first chapter. I do not see any need for improvement.Have a blessed day.
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What a wonderful idea. I would very much like to be a part of this process If you will have me. This is an excellent first chapter. I do not see any need for improvement.Have a blessed day.
Comment Written 19-Mar-2025
Comment from Faith Williams
A fascinating opening to this story. You've given us a hint about everybody's motives for attending this trip but left us hanging as to the actual host. Love the idea of different writers for each subsequent chapter.
Enjoyed this description: The seaplane glided over turquoise waters, the sun catching the surface like scattered diamonds.
Suggestions to consider:
"excitement buzzed among the nine passengers - strangers, with an invitation to a week in paradise." You mention that they're strangers, but then you tell us there are three couples, so not total strangers. Maybe a sentence to clarify?
"As the night settled in, they all looked at one another, each one questioning who had sent them the invitation and how strangers could have something in common." Two things about this sentence. The word 'look' is one of those words where a stronger verb may have a bigger impact. Maybe studied, considered, regarded? Also, was the questioning a vocal affair or internal musings?
It will be interesting to see where different writers lead this story. Thanks for a fun idea!
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A fascinating opening to this story. You've given us a hint about everybody's motives for attending this trip but left us hanging as to the actual host. Love the idea of different writers for each subsequent chapter.
Enjoyed this description: The seaplane glided over turquoise waters, the sun catching the surface like scattered diamonds.
Suggestions to consider:
"excitement buzzed among the nine passengers - strangers, with an invitation to a week in paradise." You mention that they're strangers, but then you tell us there are three couples, so not total strangers. Maybe a sentence to clarify?
"As the night settled in, they all looked at one another, each one questioning who had sent them the invitation and how strangers could have something in common." Two things about this sentence. The word 'look' is one of those words where a stronger verb may have a bigger impact. Maybe studied, considered, regarded? Also, was the questioning a vocal affair or internal musings?
It will be interesting to see where different writers lead this story. Thanks for a fun idea!
Comment Written 17-Mar-2025
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
There is so much information that is missing and we can easily be duped these days Carol. Something that is too good to be true should be avoided, you drew me into this labyrinth here Carol, much enjoyed, love Dolly x x x
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There is so much information that is missing and we can easily be duped these days Carol. Something that is too good to be true should be avoided, you drew me into this labyrinth here Carol, much enjoyed, love Dolly x x x
Comment Written 17-Mar-2025
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Wow, your chapter pulled me right in! The setting felt so real. I could see the shimmering water and feel the excitement of the passengers. I love how you introduced each character with just enough detail to make them interesting without giving too much away. That mysterious note at the end? perfect! I'm hooked and can't wait to see where the next author goes with it. Great job!
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Wow, your chapter pulled me right in! The setting felt so real. I could see the shimmering water and feel the excitement of the passengers. I love how you introduced each character with just enough detail to make them interesting without giving too much away. That mysterious note at the end? perfect! I'm hooked and can't wait to see where the next author goes with it. Great job!
Comment Written 16-Mar-2025
Comment from LJbutterfly
You have created another intriguing plot. On an island of strangers, anything could happen. Someone could go missing, or they could all talk and find out they don't like each other for some reason, or they all have a secret. With such a setting and introduction, the possibilities are endless. I look forward to seeing where others take the story.
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You have created another intriguing plot. On an island of strangers, anything could happen. Someone could go missing, or they could all talk and find out they don't like each other for some reason, or they all have a secret. With such a setting and introduction, the possibilities are endless. I look forward to seeing where others take the story.
Comment Written 16-Mar-2025
Comment from royowen
I don't really do novels or much prose Carol, too many themes buzzing around d, the good thing is you've created that theme that can go in any direction and evoke many directional themes, well done Carol blessings Roy
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I don't really do novels or much prose Carol, too many themes buzzing around d, the good thing is you've created that theme that can go in any direction and evoke many directional themes, well done Carol blessings Roy
Comment Written 15-Mar-2025
Comment from Carol Clark2
This is a great start to a book. Thanks for opening it up to others. The characters seem interesting and varied, so it will be fun to see what FS writers come up with for a common thread. Blessings. Carol
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This is a great start to a book. Thanks for opening it up to others. The characters seem interesting and varied, so it will be fun to see what FS writers come up with for a common thread. Blessings. Carol
Comment Written 15-Mar-2025
Comment from Ulla
Hi Carol. This sounds as a great project. I would like to join, but how many days do I have to write the next chapter and how do I know I'm not writing the same thing as anyone else? Please advise. The concept of this story has great potential. A big hug, Ulla xxx
reply by the author on 15-Mar-2025
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Hi Carol. This sounds as a great project. I would like to join, but how many days do I have to write the next chapter and how do I know I'm not writing the same thing as anyone else? Please advise. The concept of this story has great potential. A big hug, Ulla xxx
Comment Written 15-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 15-Mar-2025
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Lori is writing Chapter 2. Then after someone reads our two chapters, they tell me they want the next chapter and it usally takes them a day or two. It can be around 500 to 700 words. That way if I assign the chapters, only one person will be writing at a time. Hope you join us. Hugs, Carol
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I will. So pleased sign me up for the next chapter. Will that be chapter 3? Hugs, Ulla. Xx
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Yes it will ...following Lori...I will check with her and let her know that you are patiently waiting.Smiles,C
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Okay, I'll be looking out for it. Xxx
Comment from barbara.wilkey
You have me wanting to read more. I can't wait to see what everybody has to say.
Thank you for starting this.
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The invitation said it was a 'thank you' for what we did, but what exactly did we do?" (To be honest, I was wondering the same thing. It seems too good to be true. Something is wrong with this.)
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You have me wanting to read more. I can't wait to see what everybody has to say.
Thank you for starting this.
Â
The invitation said it was a 'thank you' for what we did, but what exactly did we do?" (To be honest, I was wondering the same thing. It seems too good to be true. Something is wrong with this.)
Comment Written 15-Mar-2025
Comment from Ric Myworld
Well, "better late than never" as they say. I can't sit for long; therefore, I read little on my giant 36' computer screen at my desk. And since I hate laptops and iPads for reading, I've been mostly watching my 110' television. I have read a few books, but my patience is wearing thin, and my ears are headphone sore. I've missed Fanstory and reading your stories and hopefully it won't be long before I'm back to full-tilt forward. Hope all is well in your world. Thanks for sharing.
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Well, "better late than never" as they say. I can't sit for long; therefore, I read little on my giant 36' computer screen at my desk. And since I hate laptops and iPads for reading, I've been mostly watching my 110' television. I have read a few books, but my patience is wearing thin, and my ears are headphone sore. I've missed Fanstory and reading your stories and hopefully it won't be long before I'm back to full-tilt forward. Hope all is well in your world. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 15-Mar-2025
