Waves
Mysteries buried in the depths3 total reviews
Comment from SimianSavant
What? This got only two reviews? That won't do. Your first line could be stronger ("weather" seems too generic) but the second and third really sell it, with the double K sound in the second line phonemicizing the clash of the waves and the third throwing a dark harrowing metaphor into the mix, adding a deathly sort of siren imagery to contrast with the second line. Yours is not an idyllic English seaside. And the picture captures it well, with the muted sun in the background framing the violence. Very nice work.
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What? This got only two reviews? That won't do. Your first line could be stronger ("weather" seems too generic) but the second and third really sell it, with the double K sound in the second line phonemicizing the clash of the waves and the third throwing a dark harrowing metaphor into the mix, adding a deathly sort of siren imagery to contrast with the second line. Yours is not an idyllic English seaside. And the picture captures it well, with the muted sun in the background framing the violence. Very nice work.
🦍
Comment Written 07-Jan-2025
Comment from patcelaw
your wording is so beautiful that I could actually hear the waves as they crash against the cliffs and I could also feel the water as the Spray washed over me. I wish you the very best with your writing. I also wish you a happy new year and may God richly bless you with his abundance. Patricia.
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your wording is so beautiful that I could actually hear the waves as they crash against the cliffs and I could also feel the water as the Spray washed over me. I wish you the very best with your writing. I also wish you a happy new year and may God richly bless you with his abundance. Patricia.
Comment Written 26-Dec-2024
Comment from Sugarray77
Hello Jer. I like this 5-7-5 that you have penned for the contest. I really like the second line "oceans rise to kiss the cliffs". That really is a wonderful description of a sea tossed storm. I wish you luck, my friend.
Melissa
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Hello Jer. I like this 5-7-5 that you have penned for the contest. I really like the second line "oceans rise to kiss the cliffs". That really is a wonderful description of a sea tossed storm. I wish you luck, my friend.
Melissa
Comment Written 26-Dec-2024
