Sandra's Lover
Viewing comments for Chapter 56 "Captain Jensen's update"A macabre crime thriller. Grotesque and detailed.
4 total reviews
Comment from Lea Tonin1
You're writing just gets better and better! ArticulateWell researched a lot of thought went into this.I can see, and for that reason alone deserves sixes across the board. However, mix that with talent, and it becomes exponential! I enjoyed this chapter.I'm sure I'll enjoy the whole book.I think you should publish if you can. Great job.I look forward to next one!
reply by the author on 26-Dec-2024
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You're writing just gets better and better! ArticulateWell researched a lot of thought went into this.I can see, and for that reason alone deserves sixes across the board. However, mix that with talent, and it becomes exponential! I enjoyed this chapter.I'm sure I'll enjoy the whole book.I think you should publish if you can. Great job.I look forward to next one!
Comment Written 25-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 26-Dec-2024
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Thank you very much!!
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Dear Eileen, I'm afraid I'm coming in a bit late here but have got the gist of the investigation. Perhaps you might consider adding a resume of the story so far and a list of characters? But, clearly they have a lead on the doctor and also a connection with the missing victims' names. So good momentum with the plot, hooking the reader into the intrigue. There are some edits below. But an enjoyable read. Well done, Eileen. Warm wishes Debbie
someone needed (to) follow
a little harsh on the little thing(s) - perhaps vary 'little' to 'a bit' rather than have 2 x little so close together.
tell him it(')s to help find his wife
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2024
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Dear Eileen, I'm afraid I'm coming in a bit late here but have got the gist of the investigation. Perhaps you might consider adding a resume of the story so far and a list of characters? But, clearly they have a lead on the doctor and also a connection with the missing victims' names. So good momentum with the plot, hooking the reader into the intrigue. There are some edits below. But an enjoyable read. Well done, Eileen. Warm wishes Debbie
someone needed (to) follow
a little harsh on the little thing(s) - perhaps vary 'little' to 'a bit' rather than have 2 x little so close together.
tell him it(')s to help find his wife
Comment Written 23-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2024
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I will make these changes, Thank you!!
Comment from patcelaw
This is a very nicely written story and I enjoyed reading it rather enjoyed listening to it. It flows very well when it is ready aloud. You're sentence structure your paragraph and your punctuation make it so that it is very good to listen to. Patricia
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2024
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This is a very nicely written story and I enjoyed reading it rather enjoyed listening to it. It flows very well when it is ready aloud. You're sentence structure your paragraph and your punctuation make it so that it is very good to listen to. Patricia
Comment Written 23-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2024
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Thank you Patricia - more to come!
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Your story is incredibly enjoyable. I love how you've shown the tension.
The dialogue feels natural. I like how you showed Terry's sharp instincts and Hayes's grudging respect for her. I can sense the excitement building as the investigation deepens. The pacing is spot on and I can't wait to see how all the threads come together!
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2024
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Your story is incredibly enjoyable. I love how you've shown the tension.
The dialogue feels natural. I like how you showed Terry's sharp instincts and Hayes's grudging respect for her. I can sense the excitement building as the investigation deepens. The pacing is spot on and I can't wait to see how all the threads come together!
Comment Written 23-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2024
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Thank you Michael. I enjoyed writing it too!
