Reviews from

BOOK OF RENGA POEMS

Viewing comments for Chapter 9 "A New Day Dawns"
Renga is a collective poets Japanese poem

16 total reviews 
Comment from dragonpoet
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Hi Ulla.
What a beautiful sunrise to illustrate this poem. It sounds like the way it was last Winter and maybe the start of this Winter. We did have some very seasonal temperatures last week.
This sounds like a good addition. It seems you are going the opposite tack on this one. The previous one talked of staying warm in a cold winter and you are saying you are lucky to be having a warm winter and don't need a fire in the fireplace.
I think it still works.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Happy Holidays.
Joan
P S Hope you and yours are happy and healthy.
I would like to let you know that I just published a book titled,
"The Interloper and other stories in prose and poetry". It is
available on Amazon.com and there is a link to it at the
bottom of my profile page or you can go to Amazon and
search Joan Pechter The Interloper.

 Comment Written 19-Dec-2024


reply by the author on 20-Dec-2024
    Thank you so very much, Joan. I'm glad you liked it. Also, congratulations on your new book. I will certainly have a look. Ulla xcx
reply by dragonpoet on 21-Dec-2024
    Don't mention it, Ulla,
    Merry Christmas.
    Joan
reply by the author on 21-Dec-2024
    Merry Christmas to you as well. Ulla xcx
Comment from F. William Lester
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Hi, Ulla. Glad to see you back. I hope you had a nice break (or are still having a nice break). Very well done for your first attempt. The picture is a perfect match to your poem. One comment: If I understand the format of the Renga poem (alternating 7/7 and 5/7/5 stanzas), this should be a 5/7/5 Haiku and I count four syllables in the first line and seven in the last line. My knowledge of poetry could fit on the head of a pin, but in my attempts, this has been pointed out to me. I hope this is helpful. Thanks for sharing your work. Be well, Frank.

 Comment Written 05-Dec-2024


reply by the author on 14-Dec-2024
    Thank you so much, Frank. I'm still having a break. I have to go back to see what went wrong. Thanks for letting me know. Ulla:)))
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
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That was lovely, Ulla. I just wish I could say the same. It's very seasonably cold!! After all that rain, Spain deserves some nice weather. Well done, my friend. It was nice to see you had posted. I'm looking forward to you continuing your book. Love you lots, my friend. :) Sandra xx

 Comment Written 04-Dec-2024


reply by the author on 15-Dec-2024
    Thank you so much, Sandra, and please forgive my late answer. I'm still enjoying my time off although I have just posted a story for a site contest. Thanks again, dear friend. Hugs, Ulla xxxx
Comment from June Sargent
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A nice addition to the book of renga. I'm glad you joined in this fun challenge. The new day bringing unexpected warmth is inviting. Unlike the weather here today in freezing New England!

 Comment Written 03-Dec-2024


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2024
    Thank you so much, June. So far here in my part of Spain we're having a very mild winter. Ulla xcx
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
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I have now read three Regna poems and still don't know what they are supposed to be like, so yours is good as far as I can tell. The contrast between the second and third line is interesting. It has been so cold here that a wintry day that was suddenly mild sounds wonderful, so I especially like this poem.

 Comment Written 02-Dec-2024


reply by the author on 15-Dec-2024
    Thank you so much, Carol. Please forgive my late response, but as you know, I'm having a break from FS. Having said that, I have just posted a story for a site competition, I just couldn't miss. Thanks again. Ulla xxx
Comment from Pam (respa)
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-Nice artwork and presentation, Ulla.
-You did a good job with the haiku.
-Effective nature and seasonal imagery.
-A very good opening line about the sunrise,
followed by the "wintry day."
-A very good satori line.
-You did get it right. Very well done.

 Comment Written 02-Dec-2024

Comment from karenina
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This is very "zen" -- I've been enjoying many of the entries and it seems some are writing five lines, some the haiku to [ three lines while the next author adds the 7/7 in the next post. I rather like the way it's coming together and "count" is not as strict as we once thought with Japanese forms...

If Gypsy said the count is fine I'm sure it is! BTW? I'd take some "unseasonably mild" today. It's Brrrry cold out there!

Karenina


 Comment Written 02-Dec-2024

Comment from lyenochka
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I like how you show us that beginning of a winter's day in your lovely poem, Ulla! Thanks for joining in the fun. I'll have to add to it when I get a chance.

One suggestion is to change to the adverb "unseasonably" as it describes and adjective.

 Comment Written 02-Dec-2024

Comment from barbara.wilkey
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I have no clue what a renga poem is, but I can say that I enjoyed reading this poem. The image of a new day is perfect, especially with the unseasonably mild weather.

 Comment Written 02-Dec-2024

Comment from Charles D Ezell
Exceptional
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I love the time of year when a person can see and feel the sunset and knowing later it could all disappear. Good one, Ulla. You did well with this. Love the art work.

 Comment Written 02-Dec-2024