Just one life out of a million
sharons' life with the love of her life2 total reviews
Comment from Pam (respa)
You wrote an excellent poem, and I am sorry for your losses. It had to have been so difficult.
You do a good job with the opening verse by setting the scene on a beautiful day, as well as your "papers and rhyme." That is very creative.
You also tell a very good story, and I like how you don't identify this visitor right away. It adds a bit of mystery to the story. Then you let us know that you fell for each other pretty quickly. You do a good job inserting little details, like having to get to your bread baking in the oven.
The concluding lines of that verse are also very good.
I don't know how you could write about all of this so beautifully, but you did. It shows how much you loved each other and even had your baby son. I hope that writing this has helped you, and has possibly helped someone else by reading it. I think you are fairly new to FanStory. I hope you enjoy the site.
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2024
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You wrote an excellent poem, and I am sorry for your losses. It had to have been so difficult.
You do a good job with the opening verse by setting the scene on a beautiful day, as well as your "papers and rhyme." That is very creative.
You also tell a very good story, and I like how you don't identify this visitor right away. It adds a bit of mystery to the story. Then you let us know that you fell for each other pretty quickly. You do a good job inserting little details, like having to get to your bread baking in the oven.
The concluding lines of that verse are also very good.
I don't know how you could write about all of this so beautifully, but you did. It shows how much you loved each other and even had your baby son. I hope that writing this has helped you, and has possibly helped someone else by reading it. I think you are fairly new to FanStory. I hope you enjoy the site.
Comment Written 01-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2024
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Hey there! Thank you for your comment! Enjoy your day!
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You are very welcome and you have a good day, too.
Comment from Barry Penfold
A heart-breaking theme. Well written and it should do well in the contest. Thanks for sharing and you did a good job with the rhyming. Take care and have a most wonderful day.
Regards
Barry Penfold.
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2024
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A heart-breaking theme. Well written and it should do well in the contest. Thanks for sharing and you did a good job with the rhyming. Take care and have a most wonderful day.
Regards
Barry Penfold.
Comment Written 01-Dec-2024
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2024
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Thank you for your comment and the good wishes. I hope that you have a lovely day