Reviews from

The Mighty Canyon

Contemplation on a canyon top

25 total reviews 
Comment from Cecilia A Heiskary
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Pam,

What a great poem you have written. I love how it flows and tells the story to completion. It is sad that at the end of the day that all we really have is ourself to depend. Life can be a struggle sometimes.

I loved the picture and it goes perfectly with this poem. It looks like a picture of the Grand Canyon.

Cecilia

 Comment Written 14-Nov-2024


reply by the author on 14-Nov-2024
    Thank you so much Cecilia for this wonderful review
reply by Cecilia A Heiskary on 14-Nov-2024
    You're welcome

    Cecilia
Comment from Robert Zimmerman
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hello Pam.
The questions you pose throughout the poem are very difficult.
The structure of the poem is excellent in use of rhyme and meter.
Your last stanza expresses to me a feeling of loneliness and abandonment. In my profile on FS, it says I write what I think, feel, and believe. To me, that is the best poetry. This appears to be a courageous poem and certainly expresses thoughts, feelings and beliefs. It's very well done.
I have been away from FS for three years but since my return, I have noticed your poetry and look forward to reading more. This is very good.
Robert

 Comment Written 14-Nov-2024


reply by the author on 14-Nov-2024
    Wow. Thank you Robert for these six stars and for an excellent review. I myself left fanstory
    2018 and came back last May and now I'm leaving again probably not for as long as I did last time.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a sad poem about someone being unhappy with themselves, perhaps feeling lonely and also depressed. Your poem is well rhymes Pam and some people may identify with your poignant words, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 14-Nov-2024


reply by the author on 14-Nov-2024
    Thank you Dolly for your wonderful review
Comment from Sanku
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I am.glad you didn't succumb to that .Yes as I was reading I got that hint of suicidal wish. When you feel.isolated all kinds of negative thoughts come up I used to feel depressed when I think people are isolating me...
Well worded

 Comment Written 14-Nov-2024


reply by the author on 14-Nov-2024
    Thank you Sanku for a wonderful review
Comment from Jesse James Doty
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I think you are right. Many of us ask ourselves these questions. This is philosophical and a commentary on how hard it is to please everyone and accept who we are inside. The large print size is easy on the eyes, and the rhyme scheme works well. You said in your notes you won't be posting for a while. Is this your send-off, then?
I will miss your honesty and integrity on this site.
Take care, my friend and I will think of you wherever you go.
Jesse

 Comment Written 14-Nov-2024


reply by the author on 14-Nov-2024
    hi Jesse my friend. I'm just burned out on this site. I need to take a break. All is well. Thank you for your wonderful review.
reply by Jesse James Doty on 14-Nov-2024
    You're welcome and I wish you well.
    Come back refreshed and ready to share your experiences with us.
    Jesse
Comment from Tim Margetts
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I enjoyed the poem, however it does miss on the rhyming pattern in a couple of places.
Seeing it was written in your youth this can be understood. The thought and imagery behind your words are clear.
I am sad to hear you had such a troubled youth and pleased you worked through it.
It's also sad to see a talent stop posting. I hope to read more of your work in the future.
Tim

 Comment Written 14-Nov-2024


reply by the author on 14-Nov-2024
    hi Tim, can you let me know where the rhyming was off in your opinion? I would appreciate that.

    Thank you for the great review
reply by Tim Margetts on 14-Nov-2024
    Damn, OK reread it, blame my cat who was demanding my undivided attention as I was reading your poem.
    This time I read it aloud.
    Forgive my slight on your wordsmithery.
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2024
    That's fine, Tim. I always appreciate constructive criticism. I love cats, but they can be demanding.
Comment from Brenda Strauser
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi, your poem is so heartfelt. Very moving. I can feel your pain in your words. I'm sorry you had to grow up with an abusive mother. I grew up with an abusive father. It affects every part of your life when this happens. Well written. Great job.

 Comment Written 14-Nov-2024


reply by the author on 14-Nov-2024
    Thanks Brenda for the great review
Comment from Wendy G
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

That is a quite powerful poem, as you felt caught between your own understandable needs to be yourself and also trying to please your parents. There is strong emotional intensity and a feeling of lostness and worthlessness. Powerfully expressed.
Wendy

 Comment Written 14-Nov-2024


reply by the author on 14-Nov-2024
    Wow. Thank you, Wendy for the shiny stars and wonderful review.

    It wasn't just my parents. It was everybody in my universe that I felt I had to please.
Comment from jenintorre
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is a wonderful and very thought provoking poem. Such excellent rhyme and rhythm. Why won't you be posting any more? I hope you are O.K. Love Jen,

 Comment Written 14-Nov-2024


reply by the author on 14-Nov-2024
    hi Jen. Thank you for asking. I'm fine and doing remarkably well at my recovery from my back surgery. I'm just burned out and need a break.

    Thank you so much for the shiny stars
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

These are deep words from your youth. It's perceptive that you realized that you felt forced to please others while yearning for your own identity. I could relate to that when I was a young teenager and found life futile until I found my meaning for life in Jesus. Hope you have a good time off from Fanstory.

 Comment Written 14-Nov-2024


reply by the author on 14-Nov-2024
    Thank you Helen for your well wishes and for a lovely review