Vagaries of Life
Stormy endeavors14 total reviews
Comment from Y. M. Roger
Okay... an awesome tracking of the ups and downs of life and the 'crashes' that happen along the way: young and inquisitive to that adult-plague of writer's block (lol!!). A great trail in a unique free verse! :) Thanx so much for sharing that reflective grin for the morning and best of luck in the contest! :-) Yvette
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2024
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Okay... an awesome tracking of the ups and downs of life and the 'crashes' that happen along the way: young and inquisitive to that adult-plague of writer's block (lol!!). A great trail in a unique free verse! :) Thanx so much for sharing that reflective grin for the morning and best of luck in the contest! :-) Yvette
Comment Written 18-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2024
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Hey Yvette. Great to see you on the roll, again. I read in your profile that you are now working at a Department store. Wonderful! I wanted to do something like that after my retirement, a long time ago, but gave up on that because of my artificial knees. Honestly, it's good to have you back.
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Thanx for the welcome back, sir! Been through more than a few changes these past 4 years, but I feel as though I've finally found my footing in my new life and am certainly enjoying it! Won't be on as frequently as I used to be, but come the 'dead' of winter, I'll definitely be on more (too cold to go outside in the off hours and too cold to do a lil' fixing up here in my little abode!) Take care out there! ;) Yvette
Comment from Sanku
I know about the glitter pattern and you have discribed it very well .I get the metaphorical layer in the poem and most significant is the concluding line
Blank Pages Stare... !! It happens very often...
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2024
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I know about the glitter pattern and you have discribed it very well .I get the metaphorical layer in the poem and most significant is the concluding line
Blank Pages Stare... !! It happens very often...
Comment Written 18-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2024
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Thank you Sanku for your kind review. Much appreciated.
Comment from DonandVicki
This poem brought out, like you said in your authors notes, The different phases of our life. Well written and I get the end, the dreadded blank page. I can relate to that.
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2024
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This poem brought out, like you said in your authors notes, The different phases of our life. Well written and I get the end, the dreadded blank page. I can relate to that.
Comment Written 17-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2024
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Thank you, DonandVicki, for reviewing my poem.
Comment from Nicki.B
This is a beautiful poem, and I really love the metaphorical message you've expressed within.
Sometimes I've difficulty with formatting also it can be a nuisance sorry can't help you there! Some gorgeous scenes depicted throughout. This is my favourite phrase ,'seduced ankles, foamy waters attract'
Well done and good luck with the contest
Best wishes
Nicki
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2024
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This is a beautiful poem, and I really love the metaphorical message you've expressed within.
Sometimes I've difficulty with formatting also it can be a nuisance sorry can't help you there! Some gorgeous scenes depicted throughout. This is my favourite phrase ,'seduced ankles, foamy waters attract'
Well done and good luck with the contest
Best wishes
Nicki
Comment Written 17-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2024
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Nicki, thanks much for your kind review.
Comment from nciateancho
I love how the sun and sea seem to be characters in this piece, playing along with the emotions. The way the water 'proves not so cool' and the sun 'blinks'--it's as if nature is reflecting the highs and lows of life. Beautifully written!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2024
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I love how the sun and sea seem to be characters in this piece, playing along with the emotions. The way the water 'proves not so cool' and the sun 'blinks'--it's as if nature is reflecting the highs and lows of life. Beautifully written!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2024
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Hi. Thank you much for reviewing my work. However, I am a confused about receiving 4 points when you found it beautifully written. Honestly, I would not mind a 4 if you explained why it deserved a 4. Generally speaking, if you give a writer a 6 or a 4, it would be helpful to know the reason for your rating. Of course, if the the writing or the content had problems a 4 or even a 3 would be appropriate. In your case, I would like to know what the problems were to get a 4. It would be a learning experience for me, so to speak.
On the other hand, you don't have to explain anything. It is your prerogative.=) Once again, thank you much for reading my work.
Comment from patcelaw
Sometimes when we meet those unexpected changes in our lives, we find that those changes are for our best, and it helps us to overcome some things that might have been troubling us about our past. I enjoyed this poem very much and I wish you the very best with your writing. Patricia
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2024
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Sometimes when we meet those unexpected changes in our lives, we find that those changes are for our best, and it helps us to overcome some things that might have been troubling us about our past. I enjoyed this poem very much and I wish you the very best with your writing. Patricia
Comment Written 16-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2024
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Thanks much Patricia. You made my day.
Comment from jake cosmos aller
I liked this free verse poem expressing the vagaries of life lived. I like the last stanza the best
Bravely he reenters the world.
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Searching a place to place his life,
he places a rock.
On fluttering pages,
scratches his thoughts
to pen a writer's block.
BLANK PAGES STARE!
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2024
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I liked this free verse poem expressing the vagaries of life lived. I like the last stanza the best
Bravely he reenters the world.
----------------
Searching a place to place his life,
he places a rock.
On fluttering pages,
scratches his thoughts
to pen a writer's block.
BLANK PAGES STARE!
Comment Written 16-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2024
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Jake, thank you much for your kind review. Appreciate your reading the poem.
Comment from Rachelle Allen
I really, REALLY liked this poem of yours, ShanBreen! It's so vivid and evoked spectacular feelings and pictures in my mind.
I want to say, though, that you're writing is and talent speak for themselves. You absolutely 100 percent did NOT need to include any Author's Notes, my dear. You don't want to be a member of the Department of Redundancy Department!! Trust your abilities. They are immense. I understood every last word you wrote in the body of your poem as well as the subtexts between those lines. I needed no man-splaining afterward. You've got the knack just fine. You can take that to the bank. xoxo
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2024
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I really, REALLY liked this poem of yours, ShanBreen! It's so vivid and evoked spectacular feelings and pictures in my mind.
I want to say, though, that you're writing is and talent speak for themselves. You absolutely 100 percent did NOT need to include any Author's Notes, my dear. You don't want to be a member of the Department of Redundancy Department!! Trust your abilities. They are immense. I understood every last word you wrote in the body of your poem as well as the subtexts between those lines. I needed no man-splaining afterward. You've got the knack just fine. You can take that to the bank. xoxo
Comment Written 16-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2024
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Thank you, Rachelle for your kind review. I guess you are absolutely right about my man-splaining (really?)=). You have the uncanny ability to look deep into the meaning, but believe me there are others who need explanations. Actually, there was one review that thanked me for doing that. Just the same, your comments made me feel very good. Thank you so very much for making my day.
Comment from Kahlani
Hi Shanbreen, thank you for the explanation. I was wondering about the arrangement. This poem is well written with flowing sentences and evocative language. Thank you for an enjoyable read.
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2024
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Hi Shanbreen, thank you for the explanation. I was wondering about the arrangement. This poem is well written with flowing sentences and evocative language. Thank you for an enjoyable read.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2024
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Thanks Kahlani for your kind review.
Comment from dragonpoet
Hi Shanbreen,
This free verse gives strong images of the water in the son and the diving birds, the boy playing in the water, and the effect of the son on the lattice of the fence. It shows beauty. It also seems to be about deciding to live life instead of hiding from it.
It reminds us how writing about this can be hard but it is well worth it.
Good luck in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
Enjoy the rest of your week.
Joan
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2024
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Hi Shanbreen,
This free verse gives strong images of the water in the son and the diving birds, the boy playing in the water, and the effect of the son on the lattice of the fence. It shows beauty. It also seems to be about deciding to live life instead of hiding from it.
It reminds us how writing about this can be hard but it is well worth it.
Good luck in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
Enjoy the rest of your week.
Joan
Comment Written 16-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 16-Oct-2024
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Thank you Dragonpoet for your kind review.