Sunita's Story
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "Married"An unmarried Village girl suffering from vitiligo
6 total reviews
Comment from Esther Brown
That actually made me sad. Many women are like Sunita only the defects are on the inside. Not feeling good enough and being treated like a possession is very common in third world cultures as you know. You create strong characters. Good writing. Esther
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2024
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That actually made me sad. Many women are like Sunita only the defects are on the inside. Not feeling good enough and being treated like a possession is very common in third world cultures as you know. You create strong characters. Good writing. Esther
Comment Written 04-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2024
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Hi Esther. Yes, it is a sad story but it gets worse before it gets better. With the new world setting, things are getting much better but it has to seep into villages.
My story hinges not only of how women are treated but women who have vitiligo are treated, why a rich person marries her (no love involved), what she finds out in America and what she does about it (the mystery part). I may cut out a bit when and if I publish. Esther, thanks much for reading. I sincerely appreciate your review and your comments. Thank you.
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Shanbreen, please read my story. I strongly believe the "new world view" is an illusion. Time will tell, but the evil inside doesn't change.
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Can u tell me what is the name of your story and when it was written. Thanks.
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Shanbreen I missed something. Which story are you referring to? I have a hodgepodge in my portfolio and regretfully not in any type of order.
Comment from Carol Clark2
This is a well-written chapter. I like the way you revealed the various emotions of Sunita. As to her mother-in-law, she needs some lessons in manners and caring for others. I don't like her attitude of superiority, but I think it is culturally accurate for some. Have a great weekend. Carol
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2024
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This is a well-written chapter. I like the way you revealed the various emotions of Sunita. As to her mother-in-law, she needs some lessons in manners and caring for others. I don't like her attitude of superiority, but I think it is culturally accurate for some. Have a great weekend. Carol
Comment Written 28-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2024
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Thank you Carol for your review. While in most places, this type of a mother-in-law would not be accepted, this woman lives in a village where the she cannot come to terms with her son marrying an older woman with vitiligo. In most Asian and Oriental culture, one does not marry the person but the person's family. Besides, in Sunita's case there is always the issue of children having vitiligo. Thank you sincerely for reading. I am glad you hate Mrs. Vikram as much as I do. =)
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Yes, the family influence is most important in some cultures. I guess my feelings for Mrs. Vikram spilled out in my review. LOL! Carol
Comment from Begin Again
A very moving write showing the vulnerability of the young woman and how people (husband, mother,etc.) will use their power over them. I hope things get better for her.
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2024
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A very moving write showing the vulnerability of the young woman and how people (husband, mother,etc.) will use their power over them. I hope things get better for her.
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 28-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2024
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Thank you Carol. The story continues (next Chapters) with Sunita's travel to America and her life with her husband.
Comment from Samantha Wymer
I hope things get better for this young married woman once she gets to America and hopefully her husband will treat her better than he did with her first time and all. Men can be such pigs with no regard for a woman's feelings at all. I can't wait to read chapter 5. Great writing.
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2024
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I hope things get better for this young married woman once she gets to America and hopefully her husband will treat her better than he did with her first time and all. Men can be such pigs with no regard for a woman's feelings at all. I can't wait to read chapter 5. Great writing.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2024
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Samantha, I agree. SOME men, especially in a macho society, can be real pigs. Thanks much for the review.
Comment from lancellot
Interesting. I confess, I'm sure I understand the personality of Rahul or his character. It seems to shift and change. One moment he defends Sunita, but the next he is indifferent to her, ignores her, handles her roughty, and abandons her to people he knows hates her. How he can heave no experience too, is very odd.
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2024
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Interesting. I confess, I'm sure I understand the personality of Rahul or his character. It seems to shift and change. One moment he defends Sunita, but the next he is indifferent to her, ignores her, handles her roughty, and abandons her to people he knows hates her. How he can heave no experience too, is very odd.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2024
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You ask pertinent questions. Did he really have no experience? I guess you will realize as the story continues. Thank you for your review and letting me know of your thoughts. It is very important for me to know what the reader thinks.
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
This is a superb piece of writing and I'm so sorry I have nothing more to give you. It reads fluently and movingly, impossible not to warm still more to Sunita and the way she's being treated by her husband and his mother. Her anxiety and naivety about the sex and the scene itself are vividly portrayed and provide stunning insight into her lack of expectation of intimacy as a result of her 'condition.' Mrs Vikram deserves to be seriously whipped into shape. I wish her husband had greater control over her! Your chapter is faultlessly written and moves the story on with excellent pace. My only very minor suggestion would be: He never spoke a word or ate anything (other than) drinking... since this suggests that the drinking was an exception to his 'eating' I would clarify by saying: ...or ate anything, (only) drinking (thus separating the 'drinking' from the 'eating.' I hope this makes sense,
Shanbreen, this is a very impressive write! Well done Debbie
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2024
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This is a superb piece of writing and I'm so sorry I have nothing more to give you. It reads fluently and movingly, impossible not to warm still more to Sunita and the way she's being treated by her husband and his mother. Her anxiety and naivety about the sex and the scene itself are vividly portrayed and provide stunning insight into her lack of expectation of intimacy as a result of her 'condition.' Mrs Vikram deserves to be seriously whipped into shape. I wish her husband had greater control over her! Your chapter is faultlessly written and moves the story on with excellent pace. My only very minor suggestion would be: He never spoke a word or ate anything (other than) drinking... since this suggests that the drinking was an exception to his 'eating' I would clarify by saying: ...or ate anything, (only) drinking (thus separating the 'drinking' from the 'eating.' I hope this makes sense,
Shanbreen, this is a very impressive write! Well done Debbie
Comment Written 27-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2024
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Ah, Debbie, you made my day. Yes, you are right about not eating anything, other than drinking.... It implies drinking tea is a part of eating. I will definitely change it. Thank you much.