The Pretty Parking Lot
A day I'll never forget in a Florida prison.9 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
Welcome to the site Chewster,
This is an emotional story of how God uses people to create mini miracles in this world. You were lucky to be able to record this moment. It probably took less time to witness than to speak about. This is well written story and well worth the win. Congrats. A good way to begin.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Merry Christmas.
Joan
P S After being here for 15 or so years and with help from some writers here I have self published a book titled ". There is a link to it on Amazon.com at the end of my profile. Hope you will have such helpers as you learn and enjoy your stay here.
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Welcome to the site Chewster,
This is an emotional story of how God uses people to create mini miracles in this world. You were lucky to be able to record this moment. It probably took less time to witness than to speak about. This is well written story and well worth the win. Congrats. A good way to begin.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Merry Christmas.
Joan
P S After being here for 15 or so years and with help from some writers here I have self published a book titled ". There is a link to it on Amazon.com at the end of my profile. Hope you will have such helpers as you learn and enjoy your stay here.
Comment Written 24-Dec-2024
Comment from Contests
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 A contest winning entry! A seven star rating from the Contest Committee for posting the winning contest entry. |
Comment Written 22-Dec-2024
Comment from LJbutterfly
Welcome to FanStory and congratulations on you First Milestone post. This story is very well written and paced with detailed descriptions and realistic dialogue. The observations and thoughts of the narrator flow clearly and smoothly with a powerful message. You will be an appreciated addition to this site and I look forward to reading more of your writing. Best wishes in the contest.
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2024
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Welcome to FanStory and congratulations on you First Milestone post. This story is very well written and paced with detailed descriptions and realistic dialogue. The observations and thoughts of the narrator flow clearly and smoothly with a powerful message. You will be an appreciated addition to this site and I look forward to reading more of your writing. Best wishes in the contest.
Comment Written 21-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 23-Sep-2024
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Thank you so much for these thoughtful, kind, and encouraging words! I'm so grateful you took the time to read my story and write a review. It means so much!
Comment from Ric Myworld
Well, Chewster, in reference to "Hoping to become a better writer," I don't know how much better than this you could ever hope for your writing to be. Outstanding story. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2024
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Well, Chewster, in reference to "Hoping to become a better writer," I don't know how much better than this you could ever hope for your writing to be. Outstanding story. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 20-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2024
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Wow, Ric. Those are powerful words. Thank you so much for taking the time to read my story, and for writing a review. I can't tell you how much your words mean to me. Thank you!!
Comment from jessizero
Congratulations on your first milestone post! This was a beautiful story, and you told it well. Your descriptions were wonderful. Thank you for sharing, and best wishes to you.
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2024
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Congratulations on your first milestone post! This was a beautiful story, and you told it well. Your descriptions were wonderful. Thank you for sharing, and best wishes to you.
Comment Written 18-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2024
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You are so kind! I deeply appreciate your response; it's so encouraging as I continue in this writing journey! Thanks so much for taking the time to read and review my story.
Comment from Begin Again
Congratulations on your first milestone, and welcome to FanStory. You posted a true story that was incredibly moving in several ways. One was seeing the joy in someone's eyes, the little things we take for granted come to life, and two was seeing how you, as a writer, were also openly affected. Well done!
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2024
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Congratulations on your first milestone, and welcome to FanStory. You posted a true story that was incredibly moving in several ways. One was seeing the joy in someone's eyes, the little things we take for granted come to life, and two was seeing how you, as a writer, were also openly affected. Well done!
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 18-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2024
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Thank you for these kind words. They mean so much. And thank you for taking the time to read my story and provide feedback. I'm truly grateful and flattered by your response!
Comment from CrystieCookie999
This well-written true story is touching. A life sentence for a second-degree murder that comes to an end in a faith-based way is good subject matter. I liked reading it. It flowed very well. I liked the detail of the smaller-than-usual water bottle, too.
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2024
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This well-written true story is touching. A life sentence for a second-degree murder that comes to an end in a faith-based way is good subject matter. I liked reading it. It flowed very well. I liked the detail of the smaller-than-usual water bottle, too.
Comment Written 18-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2024
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Thank you for taking the time to read my story, and for providing feedback. That you liked it is extremely gratifying to hear, and I'm most grateful for your kind words, and the specific details you included in your response.
Comment from lancellot
Hmm, interesting. I would advise going over this again for minor editing issues, but nothing that takes away from the story.
notes:
"Would you like to record the release of an inmate?" She asked.
-"Would you like to record the release of an inmate?" she asked.
{its} not often I have an opportunity to document the release of an inmate.
-it's
a forty something-year-old we'll call Judy.
-a forty something-year-old, we'll call Judy.
"What was that last part?" She asked.
-she asked
"What was your conviction?" The gate officer asked again.
-the gate officer asked again
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2024
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Hmm, interesting. I would advise going over this again for minor editing issues, but nothing that takes away from the story.
notes:
"Would you like to record the release of an inmate?" She asked.
-"Would you like to record the release of an inmate?" she asked.
{its} not often I have an opportunity to document the release of an inmate.
-it's
a forty something-year-old we'll call Judy.
-a forty something-year-old, we'll call Judy.
"What was that last part?" She asked.
-she asked
"What was your conviction?" The gate officer asked again.
-the gate officer asked again
Comment Written 17-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2024
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Thank you so much for reading my story and for your review. This is great feedback. Thanks so much for taking the time to list these specific examples.
Comment from Teri7
This is a very well written true story you have penned for the contest. You used great descriptive words and great imagery also. I with you the very best in the contest. love and blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2024
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This is a very well written true story you have penned for the contest. You used great descriptive words and great imagery also. I with you the very best in the contest. love and blessings, Teri
Comment Written 17-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2024
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I'm so grateful you took the time to read my story and post a review. It means so much! And I can't thank you enough for the kind words. It's so encouraging!