Comment from Pamusart

Excellent

Hi

I think you really need some notes here. I could not understand what you were trying to say. There had to be an overall theme that you were going for not just random words put together. So what was that theme that you were trying to get across you need to put that in your notes, I think.

Sounds like a man or boy is controlling her and she can't seem to leave him

I do know what that feels like. I tried to leave my husband a couple times and he cried and begged so I stayed.

The guy has very pretty blue eyes. It reminds me of that song by the Who called "Behind Blue Eyes"
Behind the blue eyes was a bad man.

I enjoyed reading your poem

Good job. Thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 20-Aug-2024

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reply by the author on 20-Aug-2024

Thank you, Pam. I think you understood the poem perfectly. I appreciate your input.

Comment from Kaiku

Excellent

I suspect you are from Europe. Romance is either a part of who you are or a part that you wish to enjoy. Maybe you speak of one that had been captured or one that is within your cross hairs. Either way, I believe you know what you want.

 Comment Written 20-Aug-2024

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reply by the author on 20-Aug-2024

Thank you for reading my work.