Reviews from

The Wish Bridge

A bridge that offers second chances - with a cost.

4 total reviews 
Comment from pome lover
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Well, I have been reading on this, wondering how it would end, and now I hate to say it but I've got to ask you a question. Okay, Bill- he finally stepped off and joined his wife, but Jonathan and Abby? Did they drive off it, too, or walk off? Not turn around or whatever it took to get to a real road and safety?
I have to say I hope you won the bet with your friend, because that's one hell of a story; weird, strange, but you kept telling it like it was just natural, all that stuff... so they killed themselves?...OR, since she was already dead,supposedly, he joined her. You have one good imagination. Good was not the exact word I was going to say, but I'm hoping you will give me a hint, here. :) wow! that was really something!
Katharine

 Comment Written 09-Aug-2024


reply by the author on 09-Aug-2024
    LOL! Ok... Remember Jon's mom telling them to write whenever they got to wherever they were headed and got settled?
    Abby was 'traded' for Corbin. His was a much darker soul than hers. Remember - Jonathan and Abby both saw Verin for what he was... demonic. So - yes, they were both very much alive, and in love, and starting their journey together.
    Again, thank you for the time it took to read that one, and the kind words. I found that one fairly easy to write. It just sort of followed the road, so to speak.

    I meant to mention one other story, "Destroyer." Religion has fascinated me for a long time, now. The Inquisition is one of those points in history that humans really showed what we are capable of. Not in a good way. It probably isn't your forte, but I had big fun with the characters, and friends seem to think it's something 'special.' Then again, some people think rap is special.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

You're very brave attempting a contest with your very first milestone post, and such a long one. I enjoyed reading, good luck with the contest.

I'm lying on a warm boulder just large enough for me to stretch out on, (You can omit 'on', it's an extra word that's not needed.)

"Good day to you, sir Jonathan!" (Sir)

"Big enough to shake the ground," his football team mates would tease. (teammates)

Shaky tapped the counter for the second times in less than a minute. (time)

Shaky snorted, and made a shooing motion to Corbin. (omit the comma)

He glared at Jonathan before walking out of the class room. (classroom)

. He spoke quietly, nearly a whisper. "I'm sorry it took me so long, darlin'. (whisper,)

 Comment Written 03-Aug-2024


reply by the author on 03-Aug-2024
    Keen observations! Thank you for taking the time to read my scribbling, Barbara. I truly appreciate your input. And yes, it's a long one, but if you're 'gonna be a bear - BE A GRIZZLY!!
Comment from DJ Allen
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I enjoyed reading this story. It was paced well, kept my interest and was full of suspense. The classic evil was a bit twisted and I liked what you did with the imagery with the bridge. Questions I have, what trapped this thing at this bridge? How many bridges did it have? Lots? Why are they called lots? Lots of people? I don't know what the black was that Johnathan gave the thing. Was it his soul? That isn't clear. I liked the story even though horror isn't my thing...but evil does exist, it's not an abstract. The story really is a horror story but with a happy ending for the participants...except for Corbin of course...

 Comment Written 25-Jul-2024


reply by the author on 25-Jul-2024
    Hey DJ! Many thanks for the review. Let's see... let's call the 'other' side of the bridge a realm. Verin may not have the power he once had. He mentions this when speaking on Jonathan's lack of knowledge. ("Sunday school?"). Number of bridges? Up to your imagination. "Lots," because he sees humans as a commodity, perhaps? Cattle? Recall that Verin touched Jonathan not once, but twice. The first time was to 'give' him something. The second was to remove it. I'm with you on horror not being your thing. Nor is it mine. But a dear friend, who is a proofreader for King, dared me to write a couple of those "mean, icky, sleep-depriving" stories to stretch myself a bit. It worked. It helped place me in a different arena, so to speak. Thank you again! Cheers!
Comment from iDri.Luv.Jesus
Good
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi, welcome to your 1st post, "The First Milestone." I like your catchy title "The Wish Bridge," and your opening highlight line "A bridge that offers second chances - with a cost." Plus, starting part one to the end of it - are all moving me as the reader seeking to want to find out how heavy the "Horror and Thriller" of this story will go? So far, it's not boring at all, and I would rate it a 5 star up to this point. >>>BUT! Unfortunately, after the "End of entry - JM," and starting with, "He closed the journal and placed his hand on the worn cover..." From this point on... to all the way down to the bottom ending of this story - it was so long, lengthy like a drill that keep on running without any much punch line to it, it's pretty flat. My suggestion, if it possible for you to cut down your story a bit, and give a font a bit bigger that would be so nice to the reader's eyes, especially such a long story. Since, the rate review is based overall from the beginning to the ending of the story, and I'm sorry for a 4star because 5star would considered overall "excellent." Also, a 6 star considered "exceptional" writing, and in this case, I do not have a 6 star option in my drop list. Although, I wish you the best!!!

 Comment Written 24-Jul-2024


reply by the author on 25-Jul-2024
    Thanks for the input! I admit I'm a bit perplexed with your review, but it is still appreciated. If you're more into fast-paced, 'POW' 'BOOM' 'BANG' stories, I can hook you up with that. "Wish Bridge" isn't meant to be that type of delivery.