Reviews from

The Fix

Viewing comments for Chapter 17 "The Fix - Chapter Seventeen"
A mother fights to prove her son's innocence

10 total reviews 
Comment from Daylily
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This is a good account of the personal investigation underway, Jacob. You might think about adding the name: DI Dominic Hitchens to the character listing as I cannot place who it is. I am enjoying your story very much.

 Comment Written 11-Jul-2024


reply by the author on 11-Jul-2024
    Thank you, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
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It does sound like she believes Tracey now. Why was Susannah in such a good mood that her workmate noticed. She had to be meeting someone. And whoever it was, must have killed her. But why? Hmm, there are more questions than answers. :)) Sandra xx

 Comment Written 10-Jul-2024


reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024
    Thank you Sandra.
Comment from Ulla
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Hi Jacob, I really enjoy this story which is now taking a new direction I wonder why Susannah is so excited. Also, congratulations on your 100 posts milestone. All best, Ulla:)))

 Comment Written 10-Jul-2024


reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024
    Thank you Ulla, I'm really pleased that you liked it.
Comment from tfawcus
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Nicely maintained tension in this. You give the characters a titbit to chew over, then leave them to it for a while. A little hope to cling to, but not too much.
Love that expression 'she could talk for England'! I haven't heard it for ages.

 Comment Written 10-Jul-2024


reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024
    Thank you Tony, I'm really pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
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Ruth is a little ruthless with her remark, "they're a bloody murder" - the things we say without thinking.

back to that time and find out what what was going on" (drop one "what")

I can understand Stacey being excited as there might be something here to exonerate her son. It sounds like the three are grasping at straws, or they could solve the case.

A good chapter, Jacob. Congratulations on post #100:-)

xo
Pam

 Comment Written 10-Jul-2024


reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024
    Thank you Pam, I'm really pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from BethShelby
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They are only getting dribbles of new information to go on. I would think if her son is innocent he would want his mother to all she can to get him out of jail. Good writing.

 Comment Written 09-Jul-2024


reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024
    Thank you Beth.
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
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Hey, congrats on your 100th milestone! You've beaten me to that one:) I like the way your story is going. It's taken a new turn which is very interesting if they can find out why Susannah was so excited and who she was meeting. My mind's considering all sorts of things now. I like that touch of cinnamon too in the cafe, setting the scene. Well done, Jacob. No edits noted. Debbie

 Comment Written 09-Jul-2024


reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024
    Thank you Debbie. I'm really pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
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this chapter is rich in action and revealing of character traits. It works well to have the group meeting in a cafe, but I think I would have played more on their fears of being overheard. kay

 Comment Written 09-Jul-2024


reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024
    Thank you, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
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Congratulations on your 100th milestone post!!! This is an excellent to receive it on. Stacy has some new information that could help. Too early to tell yet. I couldn't find any way to improve this post.

 Comment Written 09-Jul-2024


reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024
    Thank you Barbara, I'm really pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Lindsey Russell
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I'm really interested in this story. I don't see any major revisions needed and the glossary of characters is very helpful. Thanks for sharing and good luck with your writing endeavors.

 Comment Written 09-Jul-2024


reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024
    Thank you, I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.