Forget the Diet
Too tempting to stay on a diet.29 total reviews
Comment from CrystieCookie999
I liked reading this poem. It reminds me to stay on track with dieting but in a humorous 'take it or leave it' tone. Congratulations on the second place win.
I loved your ending line:
This dieting fad's an easy craze to kick.
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2024
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I liked reading this poem. It reminds me to stay on track with dieting but in a humorous 'take it or leave it' tone. Congratulations on the second place win.
I loved your ending line:
This dieting fad's an easy craze to kick.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2024
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You might be intereted to know you had something to do with the name given this rhythm pattern. Remember Phyllis Stewart. She came up with the pattern and named it "Gertrude" thanks to you. Here is what she wrote in 2013.
"I first heard this wonderful, rolling rhythm in kiwisteveh's "Grampus Saves the World". I've since learned that the meter is similar to that of Poe's "The Raven". I've written two poems using it, including "Fear" and "Oops!". Since no official name exists for it, I named it Gertrude form, thanks to a suggestion by CrystieCookie999, who didn't know of a name for it, but said she hoped that it was NOT called Gertrude. So, of course, being the rebel I am, I named it Gertrude." Thank you so much for the 6 stars.
Beth
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LOL. Yeah, it definitely reminded me of "The Raven." I guess Gertrude was a popular name in Poe's time anyway. You are funny. I used to have a bird marionette I named Gertrude when I was age 10 and kept it for over a decade. Recently I re-created the bird marionette but didn't name it anything.
Comment from dragonpoet
Hi Beth,
This is a good poem about how hard it is to diet and how easy it is to avoid those things that are best for us. Maybe wearing those tight pants can be a way to get encouragement to say just think how good these will look and feel when I lose the weight. You could always have one day where you can eat some sweets, but not too many.
Congrats on placing second in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Have a great day.
Joan
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2024
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Hi Beth,
This is a good poem about how hard it is to diet and how easy it is to avoid those things that are best for us. Maybe wearing those tight pants can be a way to get encouragement to say just think how good these will look and feel when I lose the weight. You could always have one day where you can eat some sweets, but not too many.
Congrats on placing second in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Have a great day.
Joan
Comment Written 10-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2024
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Thank you, Joan, I appreciate the review and congratulations. It was fun to write even though I'm not really on a diet at the moment.
Beth
Comment from Ric Myworld
Back on the road for another week or so, but caught a few minutes to read a couple posts. I'll be glad to get home and be able to keep up with reviewing. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2024
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Back on the road for another week or so, but caught a few minutes to read a couple posts. I'll be glad to get home and be able to keep up with reviewing. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 05-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2024
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Thank you for reviewed this one. I miss seeing you name pop when your gone. I the travel is going well wheter it is business or pleasure.
Beth
Comment from Jim Wile
I wish I had a 6 left for this poem, Beth. I loved everything about it, especially the great rhyming and consistent meter. Just two small places where it could be improved slightly.
In the third line of the first stanza, I think you could eliminate the first use of the word "as." It's just one syllable too many that isn't necessary for the meaning.
Also, in the 4th line of the last stanza, I think you should turn "I am" into the contraction "I'm" like in the 6th line, also to eliminate one syllable.
Otherwise, perfect. I loved your justification for the extra calories: you might need them someday if you get sick, and your justification for looser clothes! My kind of thinking.
This was really great.
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
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I wish I had a 6 left for this poem, Beth. I loved everything about it, especially the great rhyming and consistent meter. Just two small places where it could be improved slightly.
In the third line of the first stanza, I think you could eliminate the first use of the word "as." It's just one syllable too many that isn't necessary for the meaning.
Also, in the 4th line of the last stanza, I think you should turn "I am" into the contraction "I'm" like in the 6th line, also to eliminate one syllable.
Otherwise, perfect. I loved your justification for the extra calories: you might need them someday if you get sick, and your justification for looser clothes! My kind of thinking.
This was really great.
Comment Written 05-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2024
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Thank you. I'm glad you like this. I don't know how that extra 'as' got in that line. I'm glad you pointed it out. On last verse where you said I should change something, I only count eight syllables in the line which is what it is supposed to be. All lines should be eight or eleven
Comment from Nicki.B
I love this poem, I can relate to every word. All the thoughts swirling around my head, the utter temptation is real sometimes and one day I'm okay with it and other days I'm not, that's the cycle. Great entry for the prompt, best of luck with the competition
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2024
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I love this poem, I can relate to every word. All the thoughts swirling around my head, the utter temptation is real sometimes and one day I'm okay with it and other days I'm not, that's the cycle. Great entry for the prompt, best of luck with the competition
Comment Written 03-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2024
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Thank you Nicki, I"m glad you could relate and enjoyed reading my poem.
Beth
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Touch of humor thrown into this poem for good measure.
Kale, peas, tofu. Who wants them? But, they are good for dieters.
Workouts are not appealing, still got to keep those gym tights from being "too revealing."
Diet fads are easy to kick, and diets are so insanely B - O - R - I - N -G! Still, diets are the best way to keep them calories (from eating all the good stuff) under control.
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2024
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Touch of humor thrown into this poem for good measure.
Kale, peas, tofu. Who wants them? But, they are good for dieters.
Workouts are not appealing, still got to keep those gym tights from being "too revealing."
Diet fads are easy to kick, and diets are so insanely B - O - R - I - N -G! Still, diets are the best way to keep them calories (from eating all the good stuff) under control.
Comment Written 03-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2024
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Thank you Brett. I' m glad you found it humorous. It was meant to be all in fun. I'm not really doing a diet and try to make to the Y for water aerobics.
Beth
Comment from Shanbreen
Yes, dieting is never easy. I have tried to be a vegetarian but have not succeeded---even wrote a poem on it. This poem is well written and well suited for the Temptation poetry contest. All the best.
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2024
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Yes, dieting is never easy. I have tried to be a vegetarian but have not succeeded---even wrote a poem on it. This poem is well written and well suited for the Temptation poetry contest. All the best.
Comment Written 03-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2024
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Thank you for the review. I don't have any trouble being a vegetarian. I would have trouble if I had to eat meat. I am tempted by sweets though.
Beth
Comment from Rachelle Allen
I can fix this for you easily, Beth: if you eat only GIFTS of food, then the calories don't count! Oh - and on your birthday or any holiday, calories also don't count. Indulge accordingly. (You're welcome!!)
Very cute poem. xoxo
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2024
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I can fix this for you easily, Beth: if you eat only GIFTS of food, then the calories don't count! Oh - and on your birthday or any holiday, calories also don't count. Indulge accordingly. (You're welcome!!)
Very cute poem. xoxo
Comment Written 02-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2024
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Thanks Rachelle. I'm not really trying a diet and if I had to rely on gift food, I starve but thanks for the tiip. lol
Beth
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Hahaha. Very good.
Comment from Wendy G
Many will relate to this well written fun poem. Compared to your image, a diet of kale and peas doesn't sound attractive at all. I am sure an occasional treat could be okay, if one has a healthy diet and some exercise. It's just a question of how one defines "occasional". Best wishes for your entry in the contest.
Wendy
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2024
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Many will relate to this well written fun poem. Compared to your image, a diet of kale and peas doesn't sound attractive at all. I am sure an occasional treat could be okay, if one has a healthy diet and some exercise. It's just a question of how one defines "occasional". Best wishes for your entry in the contest.
Wendy
Comment Written 02-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2024
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Thank you Wendy. I so glad you found my fun to read. The only diet on on is the soft cold food recommended by my dentist and a do go to the Y to work out in water aerobics.
Comment from QC Poet
I myself am handicapped and over weight so I have found limited food portions works slower but helps me in my current condition. Good Luck in the Temptation contest as well as with the diet if this entry is non fiction
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2024
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I myself am handicapped and over weight so I have found limited food portions works slower but helps me in my current condition. Good Luck in the Temptation contest as well as with the diet if this entry is non fiction
Comment Written 02-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2024
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Thank you so much for the review and the comments.
Beth
