Purgatory
Kyrielle6 total reviews
Comment from Marilyn Hamilton
An excellent entry for the Wrtie a Kyrielle writing prompt. This was a ghost story but not a scary one...more of a sad story. The poem was beautifully written and I love the artwork you chose and the background color for the test, Good luck in the contest,
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An excellent entry for the Wrtie a Kyrielle writing prompt. This was a ghost story but not a scary one...more of a sad story. The poem was beautifully written and I love the artwork you chose and the background color for the test, Good luck in the contest,
Comment Written 28-Jun-2024
Comment from bonespur
I love the reference that ghost time ticks like a metronome. Your poem is a perfect example of what purgatory is all about. Nice job. Good luck and have a blessed day
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I love the reference that ghost time ticks like a metronome. Your poem is a perfect example of what purgatory is all about. Nice job. Good luck and have a blessed day
Comment Written 27-Jun-2024
Comment from Pamusart
Hi
This looks like a good entry for the contest. Good luck with that.
I'm trying to figure this one out.
He's a ghost, I know. He's gone to purgatory
He's haunting his old home. Are the track marks due to a drug addiction? This is the part where I got confused. It seems like such a random thing to throw out, and I don't know how it interacts with the rest of the poem. It's just coming out of nowhere.
"Track marks around my velodrome"
Maybe if I knew what Velodrome meant it would make sense. I should just go look up the word, but I'm too lazy. I looked it up. I understand it now the tracks are on a race track. It was the word Marks that threw me off. What does that have to do with the racetrack?
A humorous poem. But, what if ghosts are real and they're caught between heaven and hell?
I enjoyed reading your poem
Good job. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2024
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Hi
This looks like a good entry for the contest. Good luck with that.
I'm trying to figure this one out.
He's a ghost, I know. He's gone to purgatory
He's haunting his old home. Are the track marks due to a drug addiction? This is the part where I got confused. It seems like such a random thing to throw out, and I don't know how it interacts with the rest of the poem. It's just coming out of nowhere.
"Track marks around my velodrome"
Maybe if I knew what Velodrome meant it would make sense. I should just go look up the word, but I'm too lazy. I looked it up. I understand it now the tracks are on a race track. It was the word Marks that threw me off. What does that have to do with the racetrack?
A humorous poem. But, what if ghosts are real and they're caught between heaven and hell?
I enjoyed reading your poem
Good job. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 26-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2024
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A velodrome is the track in a bicycle race. I was referring to the fact that the ghost continuously wanders the same route around the house.
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Ah I see. So he makes marks of tracks while he?s doing the haunting
Comment from royowen
I've never actually seen one written in abcb rhyme before, they are usually in aabb rhyme, but that's ok, any rhyme scheme, but this is unusual, great job, you followed the rules, well done, good luck, blessings Roy
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I've never actually seen one written in abcb rhyme before, they are usually in aabb rhyme, but that's ok, any rhyme scheme, but this is unusual, great job, you followed the rules, well done, good luck, blessings Roy
Comment Written 26-Jun-2024
Comment from papa55mike
There are so many forms of poetic death from banshees to demons, that prowl the night. What a wonderfully written poem. Good luck in the contest!
Have a great day, and God bless.
mike
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There are so many forms of poetic death from banshees to demons, that prowl the night. What a wonderfully written poem. Good luck in the contest!
Have a great day, and God bless.
mike
Comment Written 26-Jun-2024
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Very creative. Your poem seems almost haunting. I see themes of death, loneliness, and the afterlife. The repetition of "I set out on my ghostly roam" creates a sense of ongoing wandering. I like that. Well done!
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Very creative. Your poem seems almost haunting. I see themes of death, loneliness, and the afterlife. The repetition of "I set out on my ghostly roam" creates a sense of ongoing wandering. I like that. Well done!
Comment Written 26-Jun-2024