Dear Loving Heavenly Father
A man of God who deeply affected my life10 total reviews
Comment from jlsavell
Esther,
How are you? This is a deeply moving, troublesome and an extremely transparent post.
Why do I say troublesome? For this reader, it conjures up my own memories of fear and neglect, of not just a husband's family's threats but my own flesh and blood.
I do believe in our lives, we do cross paths with some of the most social and interpersonal people imbued with more wisdom and insight than we immediately recognize or appreciate.
It appears as if not only your pastor but the judge possessed these qualities.
I remember one year in the early 90s, I was a front end manager for a 4star restaurant. There was a young beautiful lady who was waiting tables to pay for her pilots school and license. We became extremely busy that night and I could tell she was crumbling under the pressure. She ran to the restroom clearly panicked. I walked in and she was wringing her hands while pacing back and forth.
I had such empathy for her and asked her what was going on. I thought it would be something in her personal life. It wasn't. It was the crowd and the pressure of insuring everyone got served and enjoyed their experience at our restaurant. She was freaking out.
I gently took her by the shoulders, looked her in the eyes and stated - I thought you wanted to be a commercial pilot. She said she did, it was her dream.
I then told her she better take a deep breath because this restaurant is nothing in comparison to insuring her patrons arrive safely and enjoy their lying experience. Take a deep breath, get it together or keep reminding me to never risk flying with you- if you can buckle under this kind of pressure. I left her and she soon came out of the restroom taking command of the whole waitstaff. I was so relieved but wondered why the sudden change from absolute fear and panic to let's get it done and do it right.
Ten years later, I was at the DFW awaiting a flight. In the short distance I eyed three uniformed people who I believed to be pilots. One was a woman and looked so familiar I couldn't shake it. Then it suddenly dawned on me that it was this beautiful young lady. I called after her and she turned to me. It was her and she recognized me. I wasn't sure she would.
She smiled so big, said something to the other two and motioned me over. She gave me a huge hug and I was flabbergasted. Why the reaction. She turned to the other two pilots and told me I was one of the reasons she was a pilot today. I was confused. She then looked at me and reminded me about the incident in the restaurant bathroom and took it so to heart, it changed her fear and anxiety to determination and control. I was extremely humbled by this. Extremely.
I relayed the story because I am convinced we all have the ability to help or change another's life with the words we speak.
Why do I say transparent? Here in this work you have shown the courage to speak of your own indiscretion and vulnerability and the fear which mitigated your choices. This takes courage.
Very well written and thank you for sharing.
Jimi
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2024
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Esther,
How are you? This is a deeply moving, troublesome and an extremely transparent post.
Why do I say troublesome? For this reader, it conjures up my own memories of fear and neglect, of not just a husband's family's threats but my own flesh and blood.
I do believe in our lives, we do cross paths with some of the most social and interpersonal people imbued with more wisdom and insight than we immediately recognize or appreciate.
It appears as if not only your pastor but the judge possessed these qualities.
I remember one year in the early 90s, I was a front end manager for a 4star restaurant. There was a young beautiful lady who was waiting tables to pay for her pilots school and license. We became extremely busy that night and I could tell she was crumbling under the pressure. She ran to the restroom clearly panicked. I walked in and she was wringing her hands while pacing back and forth.
I had such empathy for her and asked her what was going on. I thought it would be something in her personal life. It wasn't. It was the crowd and the pressure of insuring everyone got served and enjoyed their experience at our restaurant. She was freaking out.
I gently took her by the shoulders, looked her in the eyes and stated - I thought you wanted to be a commercial pilot. She said she did, it was her dream.
I then told her she better take a deep breath because this restaurant is nothing in comparison to insuring her patrons arrive safely and enjoy their lying experience. Take a deep breath, get it together or keep reminding me to never risk flying with you- if you can buckle under this kind of pressure. I left her and she soon came out of the restroom taking command of the whole waitstaff. I was so relieved but wondered why the sudden change from absolute fear and panic to let's get it done and do it right.
Ten years later, I was at the DFW awaiting a flight. In the short distance I eyed three uniformed people who I believed to be pilots. One was a woman and looked so familiar I couldn't shake it. Then it suddenly dawned on me that it was this beautiful young lady. I called after her and she turned to me. It was her and she recognized me. I wasn't sure she would.
She smiled so big, said something to the other two and motioned me over. She gave me a huge hug and I was flabbergasted. Why the reaction. She turned to the other two pilots and told me I was one of the reasons she was a pilot today. I was confused. She then looked at me and reminded me about the incident in the restaurant bathroom and took it so to heart, it changed her fear and anxiety to determination and control. I was extremely humbled by this. Extremely.
I relayed the story because I am convinced we all have the ability to help or change another's life with the words we speak.
Why do I say transparent? Here in this work you have shown the courage to speak of your own indiscretion and vulnerability and the fear which mitigated your choices. This takes courage.
Very well written and thank you for sharing.
Jimi
Comment Written 02-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2024
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Jimi, thank you. I loved your story about the pilot. God certainly used your words for good in her life. Your comments were well thought out and meaningful. Esther
Comment from EeanBlack
I read this because I liked your name. I loved this because of the honesty and strength that it brought me. You are more complete as a woman than you think. I am amazed. god bless. I write fiction based on my feelings. Good read.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2024
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I read this because I liked your name. I loved this because of the honesty and strength that it brought me. You are more complete as a woman than you think. I am amazed. god bless. I write fiction based on my feelings. Good read.
Comment Written 01-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2024
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Thank you Eean. I was blessed by God to have this pastor in my life. Esther
Comment from Liz O'Neill
I am glad you finally got decent counseling I guess getting counseling from a minister or pastor helped even though he wasn't able to offer you knowledgeable advice.
My experience from working with women when I worked for 30 years with domestic violence, I observed that the pastor did not really understand what domestic violence was and thought that God could change everything. That was not always the case which I think you found out. This has a nice ending Something I'm not often used to I'm happy for you.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2024
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I am glad you finally got decent counseling I guess getting counseling from a minister or pastor helped even though he wasn't able to offer you knowledgeable advice.
My experience from working with women when I worked for 30 years with domestic violence, I observed that the pastor did not really understand what domestic violence was and thought that God could change everything. That was not always the case which I think you found out. This has a nice ending Something I'm not often used to I'm happy for you.
Comment Written 29-May-2024
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2024
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Liz, thank you for reading. It seriously took years of counseling before I was able to feel strong enough in my boundaries to marry again. Although I almost married twice, as you might have read in "My Lover's Things" or "My Knight". When you are in the situation you can't see how crazy it is. Esther
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I was in a relationship with a woman who I think is was psycho. At first I didn't have any red flags but then if I look back I say oh yes there were red flags but I was just desperate to have that be a relationship. The next one fortunately was a very healthy i just messed it up with my adult child lying. I think I broke my partner's heart.Well we talked years later and she said that her mother used to lie to her all the time so she just couldn't have that going on in our relationship. She said maybe someone else would be okay with it. I didn't even realize it. She kept telling me I was lying and I said no I'm not. Finally I saw it and then I had broken her heart so that was a rough lesson, for both of us.
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Regrets from recognizing the pain I caused others by my poor choices, laying it out there, and asking forgiveness when appropriate is part of my personal journey. Beats living in denial. Esther.
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Good move
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
I thought your letter came across as deeply heartfelt and reflective. Y ou show a profound sense of gratitude and appreciation towards Pastor D for his guidance and support. I thought your letter did a wonderful job of showing how marriage can be difficult. But we can count on faith to help us during any difficult time. Well done!
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2024
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I thought your letter came across as deeply heartfelt and reflective. Y ou show a profound sense of gratitude and appreciation towards Pastor D for his guidance and support. I thought your letter did a wonderful job of showing how marriage can be difficult. But we can count on faith to help us during any difficult time. Well done!
Comment Written 29-May-2024
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2024
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Michael I appreciate you reading. God finally got through to me that His love was enough to fill my heart. Once I "got it", He sent me the wonderful man I am married to. Totally different from what I would have picked. Thanks for reading. Esther
Comment from Nicole Schmidt
This is strong in emotion and imagery. I like the real feel and rawness. This grabbed my attention and held it from start to finish. Way to go on this. I wish you luck in all your writing endeavours.
reply by the author on 29-May-2024
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This is strong in emotion and imagery. I like the real feel and rawness. This grabbed my attention and held it from start to finish. Way to go on this. I wish you luck in all your writing endeavours.
Comment Written 29-May-2024
reply by the author on 29-May-2024
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Thank you so much Nicole for reading this. Esther
Comment from Ric Myworld
I don't know how you could possibly shorten it, or at least much, and have it say all the same things. So, go with it. As always, your words are pitchfork enough to get to the guts. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 28-May-2024
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I don't know how you could possibly shorten it, or at least much, and have it say all the same things. So, go with it. As always, your words are pitchfork enough to get to the guts. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 28-May-2024
reply by the author on 28-May-2024
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I am not happy with it as a Dear God sort of letter. I just can't wrap my head around writing a prayer for a contest. Is there any way to remove something from a contest and try again?
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I am not happy with it as a Dear God sort of letter. I just can't wrap my head around writing a prayer for a contest. Is there any way to remove something from a contest and try again?
Comment from jim vecchio
You earn six stars, but not for a good story. I wish it never had to be told. But you were truly candid and honest, just as one should be to God. I wish I were a hundred and fifty years younger. I don't see how a man can break your trust as that husband did and feel at all good about it. I know, for becoming my wife and being the mother of my daughter, there is nothing I wouldn't sacrifice for my wife.
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
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You earn six stars, but not for a good story. I wish it never had to be told. But you were truly candid and honest, just as one should be to God. I wish I were a hundred and fifty years younger. I don't see how a man can break your trust as that husband did and feel at all good about it. I know, for becoming my wife and being the mother of my daughter, there is nothing I wouldn't sacrifice for my wife.
Comment Written 27-May-2024
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
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Thanks Jim. The amazing thing about God's love is He never betrays our trust.
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Thanks Jim. The amazing thing about God's love is He never betrays our trust.
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I'm afraid that if He and I were in a courtroom like Trump is, I would have much to be ashamed about. Thank God, He forgives.
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Amen. He DOES! I am not happy with that letter as a contest entry. I wish I could find the pastor and send it to him. God certainly used him in my life.
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It's amazing how many individuals God has used in both our lives to bring us to our senses.
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God goes after his straying lambs, and I don't think I could have escaped. Each bad choice led to a new tragedy. The first divorce I believe was God putting a hedge of protection around me. But I kept trying to fix my life my way.
Comment from T B Botts
Hello Esther,
you've covered a lot in your story; a bit like a confession or addressed to an audience rather than a prayer to God. However, I can see how all of the issues that you've endured in your life would come pouring out. I'm glad that the pastor was some help to you. I'm delighted that you appear to be recovered from your past and know that God can take any situation and use it for good.
Have a blessed day gal.
Tom
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
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Hello Esther,
you've covered a lot in your story; a bit like a confession or addressed to an audience rather than a prayer to God. However, I can see how all of the issues that you've endured in your life would come pouring out. I'm glad that the pastor was some help to you. I'm delighted that you appear to be recovered from your past and know that God can take any situation and use it for good.
Have a blessed day gal.
Tom
Comment Written 27-May-2024
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
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Thanks Tom. Writing a letter to God just seemed presumptuous. Prayer is deeply personal and not meant for an audience.
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Thanks Tom. Writing a letter to God just seemed presumptuous. Prayer is deeply personal and not meant for an audience.
Comment from Julie Helms
This is such a heartfelt plea to get word to your pastor of all he's done for you. What trials you have been through! I'm so glad you were able to see that God was with you through it all.
I especially like the verse you referenced about god repaying the years the locust have eaten. I use that one also. Thank you so much for sharing.
Julie
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
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This is such a heartfelt plea to get word to your pastor of all he's done for you. What trials you have been through! I'm so glad you were able to see that God was with you through it all.
I especially like the verse you referenced about god repaying the years the locust have eaten. I use that one also. Thank you so much for sharing.
Julie
Comment Written 27-May-2024
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
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Thanks Julie.
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Thanks Julie.
Comment from lyenochka
What a horrible time you had and a horrible ex and his mother! But God was there and used all the right people especially your pastor. For the contest, this may not quite work because it's more to your pastor. So you could rewrite and address it to God and thank Him for what your pastor did. Just a thought. Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
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What a horrible time you had and a horrible ex and his mother! But God was there and used all the right people especially your pastor. For the contest, this may not quite work because it's more to your pastor. So you could rewrite and address it to God and thank Him for what your pastor did. Just a thought. Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 27-May-2024
reply by the author on 27-May-2024
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I write prayers to God sometimes, but I guess I don't know how to do it for a contest. Good thought.
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I write prayers to God sometimes, but I guess I don't know how to do it for a contest. Good thought.
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I think writing prayers is a great practice because when we read them years later, we see how God answered!
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I wish I could send that letter to the pastor and try another for the contest. Can an entry be replaced or removed?
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I think you would have to ask Tom. Just click on Contact Us button in messages. Hope you can reach your pastor. You can still leave it as is. It was just a suggestion.
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Appreciate your advice. I will check it out.
