The Interloper
Viewing comments for Chapter 3 "The Early Years Part 3"a family sage told by the ignored one
7 total reviews
Comment from GoWiSt
"a messenger arrived on a lathered horse." The horse was covered in soapy bubbles--lather?
Hmm, something's definitely fishy here. First, it was the cholera. But now more sick a the office than at home. Wonder what's causing it. Guess we'll find out in subsequent chapters...
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2024
  |
"a messenger arrived on a lathered horse." The horse was covered in soapy bubbles--lather?
Hmm, something's definitely fishy here. First, it was the cholera. But now more sick a the office than at home. Wonder what's causing it. Guess we'll find out in subsequent chapters...
Comment Written 15-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2024
-
You're welcome. When used about a horse lathered means full of sweat, Yes you will.
Joan
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
I would love to have some author's notes here, Joan just to fill in the background and time period. But this is beautifully written to convey the horror of this disease and how quickly it could take hold. The paragraph about the bed pan is so real that I'm still wondering about whether the bushes would ever have survived the onslaught! The only edits I found was:
Doctors couldn't figure out what was causing the sickness (or) why some got better (while) others died."
An excellent chapter making me want to read more. Thank you Joan. Debbie
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2024
|
I would love to have some author's notes here, Joan just to fill in the background and time period. But this is beautifully written to convey the horror of this disease and how quickly it could take hold. The paragraph about the bed pan is so real that I'm still wondering about whether the bushes would ever have survived the onslaught! The only edits I found was:
Doctors couldn't figure out what was causing the sickness (or) why some got better (while) others died."
An excellent chapter making me want to read more. Thank you Joan. Debbie
Comment Written 14-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2024
-
Thanks for the read, review, editing and generous rating, Debbie.
All are much appreciated.
Joan
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
This is an unusual story. It is set in time when carriages were used and yet there were regular manufacturing plants. You also need to do a much better job of proofreading. These are corrections you need to make:
(H=He)(sad=said) (his=my) (we=I) (you=he) (help=helping) Dr. Snow (said) the culprit . . .
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2024
 |
This is an unusual story. It is set in time when carriages were used and yet there were regular manufacturing plants. You also need to do a much better job of proofreading. These are corrections you need to make:
(H=He)(sad=said) (his=my) (we=I) (you=he) (help=helping) Dr. Snow (said) the culprit . . .
Comment Written 13-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2024
-
Thanks, Carol, for reading and reviewing, I am sorry about all the misprints. I will correct them
Joan
Comment from Teri7
Joan, This is a very interesting and well written story. You used very good descriptive words and very good imagery with your words. Thanks for sharing. love and blessings, teri
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2024
|
Joan, This is a very interesting and well written story. You used very good descriptive words and very good imagery with your words. Thanks for sharing. love and blessings, teri
Comment Written 13-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2024
-
Hi Teri,
Thanks for the review and the editing. I will let you know when the corrections are made.
Joan
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
So it was the well water. It had to be something that everyone drank. But the new cough he was having, it was strange that it got better at home, but worse at work. I wonder if he was suffering from tuberculosis. Most patients who caught that were sent to the country, and in my country, UK, they were sent to Switzerland if the family could afford it. You did a wonderful job with this chapter, Joan, really well done. :))Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 21-May-2024
|
So it was the well water. It had to be something that everyone drank. But the new cough he was having, it was strange that it got better at home, but worse at work. I wonder if he was suffering from tuberculosis. Most patients who caught that were sent to the country, and in my country, UK, they were sent to Switzerland if the family could afford it. You did a wonderful job with this chapter, Joan, really well done. :))Sandra xxx
Comment Written 21-May-2024
reply by the author on 21-May-2024
-
Thanks for reading so carefully, Sandra, I am glad you like it.
Joan
Comment from Tom Horonzy
I muse and think how cholera, scarlet fever, and whooping coughs were in the Covid of the 30 and 40's and how fortunate we had a President who took the pharmaceuticals to task and got a serum on the market in less than half the time the scientists were telling officials it would be to market it.
reply by the author on 17-May-2024
|
I muse and think how cholera, scarlet fever, and whooping coughs were in the Covid of the 30 and 40's and how fortunate we had a President who took the pharmaceuticals to task and got a serum on the market in less than half the time the scientists were telling officials it would be to market it.
Comment Written 17-May-2024
reply by the author on 17-May-2024
-
Hi Tom,
Thanks for reading and commenting on my chapter. I appreciate the high rating.
Joan
Comment from royowen
Ist that amazing? Obviously it is something environmental, what else could it be? I wonder what is now, the men aren't getting it now, I wonder if the doctors will figure it out, beautifully written Joan, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 17-May-2024
|
Ist that amazing? Obviously it is something environmental, what else could it be? I wonder what is now, the men aren't getting it now, I wonder if the doctors will figure it out, beautifully written Joan, blessings Roy
Comment Written 17-May-2024
reply by the author on 17-May-2024
-
Hi Roy.
Thanks for. The kind comments.
Joan
-
Most welcome
-
Most welcome