Its Depth Deceptive
Haiku13 total reviews
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
That's an interesting take on things. This poem is well written. The green color for the matting is disconcerting. A beige to represent the sand would be much better. My opinion only.
Karen
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That's an interesting take on things. This poem is well written. The green color for the matting is disconcerting. A beige to represent the sand would be much better. My opinion only.
Karen
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Sanku
Thank you for participating in the haiku club event. Great entry. Check your syllable count, you have 8 syllables on the second line. Good connection between lines. Beautiful presentation and imagery.
Good job,
its depth de/cep/tive = 5
o/cean churns up dead/wood ma/tters = 8 syllables
like a rest/less mind= 5
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Sanku
Thank you for participating in the haiku club event. Great entry. Check your syllable count, you have 8 syllables on the second line. Good connection between lines. Beautiful presentation and imagery.
Good job,
its depth de/cep/tive = 5
o/cean churns up dead/wood ma/tters = 8 syllables
like a rest/less mind= 5
Comment Written 18-May-2024
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Thank you very much.
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Do you know anything about a poem called "sanku" somebody recommended it but she didn't know anything about it. I searched on line and couldn't find it.
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i tried google and was unable to find anything. But I found that in Japanese 'sanku' means a kind pattern for candle sticks!
Comment from nancyjam
I enjoyed your beautiful Haiku that compares the churning ocean to a restless mind that also churns up bothersome matters that really don't matter.Good lucking the contest.
Nancy
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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I enjoyed your beautiful Haiku that compares the churning ocean to a restless mind that also churns up bothersome matters that really don't matter.Good lucking the contest.
Nancy
Comment Written 17-May-2024
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Thank you very much
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Thank you for sharing this club entry with us. I enjoyed reading. The ocean has always been a mystery to me. I liked the metaphor of a restless mind. I am pretty sure they're very similar.
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Thank you for sharing this club entry with us. I enjoyed reading. The ocean has always been a mystery to me. I liked the metaphor of a restless mind. I am pretty sure they're very similar.
Comment Written 17-May-2024
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Thank you very much.
Comment from Sally Law
Good morning, Sanku! This is a lovely ocean haiku poem you've crafted for the writing prompt. Beautifully written and presented too.
Sending you my best today as always, and my very best wishes in the challenge.
Sal :)) xoxo
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Good morning, Sanku! This is a lovely ocean haiku poem you've crafted for the writing prompt. Beautifully written and presented too.
Sending you my best today as always, and my very best wishes in the challenge.
Sal :)) xoxo
Comment Written 17-May-2024
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Thank you Sally.
Comment from jaded831
A bit abstract, it makes the reader think, I like that. I read it many times. My perception of your poem is we all have oceans within us, it is up to us to expose our inner truth, no matter how insignificant we think our thoughts are. As long as they are good thoughts that would better our world.
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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A bit abstract, it makes the reader think, I like that. I read it many times. My perception of your poem is we all have oceans within us, it is up to us to expose our inner truth, no matter how insignificant we think our thoughts are. As long as they are good thoughts that would better our world.
Comment Written 17-May-2024
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Thank you very much
Comment from GWHARGIS
I like that this made me think of the ocean tossing rocks and shells around. Covering and uncovering things with sand and seaweeds. Life covers and uncovers things periodically. Our minds move memories around like that. Gretchen
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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I like that this made me think of the ocean tossing rocks and shells around. Covering and uncovering things with sand and seaweeds. Life covers and uncovers things periodically. Our minds move memories around like that. Gretchen
Comment Written 15-May-2024
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Thank you very much..
Comment from jessizero
I keep counting one syllable too many on that second line, but I could be wrong. Your poem was lovely, though. Thank you for sharing, and best wishes to you.
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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I keep counting one syllable too many on that second line, but I could be wrong. Your poem was lovely, though. Thank you for sharing, and best wishes to you.
Comment Written 15-May-2024
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Thank you very much..
Comment from patcelaw
This is a very well written haiku for the haiku club. I wish you the very best with all of your writing and I also wish you a wonderful week. May God bless you. Patricia .
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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This is a very well written haiku for the haiku club. I wish you the very best with all of your writing and I also wish you a wonderful week. May God bless you. Patricia .
Comment Written 15-May-2024
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Thank you very much.
Comment from Debra White
Hello :)
I enjoyed reading your haiku.
I love the simile of the churning ocean and a restless mind - makes perfect sense to me. Nice use of alliteration in line one.
Best wishes, Debra
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Hello :)
I enjoyed reading your haiku.
I love the simile of the churning ocean and a restless mind - makes perfect sense to me. Nice use of alliteration in line one.
Best wishes, Debra
Comment Written 15-May-2024
reply by the author on 25-May-2024
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Thank you very much..
