My Blood Orange Winters
I just LOVE blood oranges... recipes below.2 total reviews
Comment from Kaiku
I love blood oranges. The last line doesn't flow as well as the first two. Watering is usually the word that follows mouth. So mouth watering goodness would be the best line (in my opinion) but then you are 1 syllable long. So, I would go with 'mouth watering good'.
reply by the author on 09-Mar-2024
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I love blood oranges. The last line doesn't flow as well as the first two. Watering is usually the word that follows mouth. So mouth watering goodness would be the best line (in my opinion) but then you are 1 syllable long. So, I would go with 'mouth watering good'.
Comment Written 09-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 09-Mar-2024
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Thank for the constructive feedback
I was going for the rhyme sweetness / goodness
But the count is off with watering goodness.
You spurred me to chance the closing line completely:
Daily temptation.
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nice
Comment from Baltimore Born
Yes, blood oranges are a treat for my family. Your poem is well-written. Your 5-7-5 syllable count is on point for this writing prompt. Your picture compliments the poem well. Nice job.
reply by the author on 09-Mar-2024
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Yes, blood oranges are a treat for my family. Your poem is well-written. Your 5-7-5 syllable count is on point for this writing prompt. Your picture compliments the poem well. Nice job.
Comment Written 09-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 09-Mar-2024
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I changed the closing line to daily temptation seeing
Mouth water goodness should be actually:
Mouth watering goodness ( which rhymed with sweetness) but then I have 6 and not 5 syllables.
Daily temptation
sums up well what they are right ?
I see you and your family are big consumers.
