Dinerviews Part 3
A morning with benjamin Franklin6 total reviews
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Great concept, interviewing the founding fathers. Woulda been nice to hear some historical stuff besides hi French dalliance though (smiley face here)
Is the rig a manual transmission? If automatic, why not 'park' instead of neutral?
Best wishes.
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2024
Great concept, interviewing the founding fathers. Woulda been nice to hear some historical stuff besides hi French dalliance though (smiley face here)
Is the rig a manual transmission? If automatic, why not 'park' instead of neutral?
Best wishes.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2024
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No, it's 13-speed Fuller trany.
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Does neutral have a 'lock-in' system, preventing accidental shifting?
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No. I just put it in neutral, set the air brakes and walk away. if it ever did the brakes would stall out the engine.
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Gotcha.
Comment from CrystieCookie999
This has some clever parts. I know Ben Franklin had many lady friends. I am glad you kept a certain detail a bit more subtle as a suggestion.
Little fixes, even though I realize the trucker narrator is not a college genius.
deliverys
Just say deliveries.
"I did. He plead the fifth amendment."
I would say: "I did. He pled the Fifth Amendment."
"You have yourself a fruitfull and happy life. Goodbye."
Change fruitfull to fruitful.
The inside laid in a huge pile of rubble
Just change 'laid' to 'lay.' Otherwise it sounds like you are personifying 'inside' to be able to lay in supplies, even if it is a huge pile of rubble.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2024
This has some clever parts. I know Ben Franklin had many lady friends. I am glad you kept a certain detail a bit more subtle as a suggestion.
Little fixes, even though I realize the trucker narrator is not a college genius.
deliverys
Just say deliveries.
"I did. He plead the fifth amendment."
I would say: "I did. He pled the Fifth Amendment."
"You have yourself a fruitfull and happy life. Goodbye."
Change fruitfull to fruitful.
The inside laid in a huge pile of rubble
Just change 'laid' to 'lay.' Otherwise it sounds like you are personifying 'inside' to be able to lay in supplies, even if it is a huge pile of rubble.
Comment Written 14-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2024
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Thanks, Christie. I'll check those tips out.
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
I'm sorry. I messed up my review here, I thought I was adding my signature and other things pasted. I will reread your work Very interesting, imaginative, and clever story. It took a good, unexpected turn too, good imagery, descriptions, and dialogue.
Best wishes!
Alex or Alexandra (not Alexa)So sorry :[
Writing and losing sleep lately ugh typos
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2024
I'm sorry. I messed up my review here, I thought I was adding my signature and other things pasted. I will reread your work Very interesting, imaginative, and clever story. It took a good, unexpected turn too, good imagery, descriptions, and dialogue.
Best wishes!
Alex or Alexandra (not Alexa)So sorry :[
Writing and losing sleep lately ugh typos
Comment Written 14-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2024
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Thanks, Alexa. And I'm not done yet.
Comment from royowen
I take this has something to do with existing on two plains of tome, with the first person being narrator, it may sometimes be good as third person eye glance. Viola seems to be a Little annoyed by the visitation to her diner, beautifully written Tom, blessings Roy
Typo : He plead(s) the fifth 2: took several (swings) of my...swig
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2024
I take this has something to do with existing on two plains of tome, with the first person being narrator, it may sometimes be good as third person eye glance. Viola seems to be a Little annoyed by the visitation to her diner, beautifully written Tom, blessings Roy
Typo : He plead(s) the fifth 2: took several (swings) of my...swig
Comment Written 14-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2024
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Thanks, Roy.
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Most welcome
Comment from Julie Helms
An interesting and non-traditional way to introduce your historical characters into the story. If the story of Ben Franklin and the Madame in Paris is based on fact, I have never heard that before.
So since he wasn't asleep, you have me wondering what was going on? Your story kept my attention to the end. Thanks for sharing! Julie
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2024
An interesting and non-traditional way to introduce your historical characters into the story. If the story of Ben Franklin and the Madame in Paris is based on fact, I have never heard that before.
So since he wasn't asleep, you have me wondering what was going on? Your story kept my attention to the end. Thanks for sharing! Julie
Comment Written 14-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2024
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HBO did an 8-part series on John Adams and the bathtub thing was in there. Thanks for the nice review.
Comment from patcelaw
I am always amazed at your stories about the diner, and then visitor. Did you have it is a fun read and I enjoyed it very much. I wish you the very best with all of your writing. May you have a wonderful day and may God bless you. Patricia.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2024
I am always amazed at your stories about the diner, and then visitor. Did you have it is a fun read and I enjoyed it very much. I wish you the very best with all of your writing. May you have a wonderful day and may God bless you. Patricia.
Comment Written 14-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2024
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Thank you, Patrice. And I'm not done yet.