Life's Twisted Road
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Life's Twisted Road - Chap 6"Pages turn, stories change, bonds crumble
19 total reviews
Comment from Liz O'Neill
Storms make wonderful metaphors try saying I do delete select all help try saying undo delete select all help. You have done a wonderful job with other metaphors and similes. A lot of people don't use similes. They are worried their similes are cliche but yours are fine. This little conversation isn't off to a very good start: "My future is football, not taking care of your baby."My baby! I didn't do this alone. If you recall, you were there too." A great ending
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2024
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Storms make wonderful metaphors try saying I do delete select all help try saying undo delete select all help. You have done a wonderful job with other metaphors and similes. A lot of people don't use similes. They are worried their similes are cliche but yours are fine. This little conversation isn't off to a very good start: "My future is football, not taking care of your baby."My baby! I didn't do this alone. If you recall, you were there too." A great ending
Comment Written 14-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2024
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Thanks, Liz. Even though the story is fiction, a lot of the details and emotions came from my personal life. My family became very dysfunctional and the pain was unbearable. As I wrote the story, I hoped to help others and to help myself as well. Thank you so much.
Smiles and hugs,Carol
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That was my goal with my autobiography. I had a lot of people on here reflecting from some of the incidences that I was reporting. We help other people heal, good work
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thank you!
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***Smile***
Comment from karenina
Bobby is an idiot and Jason's a close second...closing in on first!
" My future is football, not taking care of your baby."
RUKM? Is this the line every young "man" (I use the term loosely) learns to recite?
Like "we" hung out, and "we" had sex" but now "you" didn't take those magic pills, and "I" am not getting stuck with "your" baby!
He's a creep. I'm betting on cash in the envelope...so she can take care of HER problem.
(That was a great venting session--thanks!)
Karenina
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2024
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Bobby is an idiot and Jason's a close second...closing in on first!
" My future is football, not taking care of your baby."
RUKM? Is this the line every young "man" (I use the term loosely) learns to recite?
Like "we" hung out, and "we" had sex" but now "you" didn't take those magic pills, and "I" am not getting stuck with "your" baby!
He's a creep. I'm betting on cash in the envelope...so she can take care of HER problem.
(That was a great venting session--thanks!)
Karenina
Comment Written 05-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2024
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NUMERO UNO .... the mindset of far too many people these days. Yes, you have to look out for yourself, but not by trampling all over everyone else.... especially when it's YOUR responsibility. Appreciate the venting!!!
Hugs, Carol
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So true of some! "How do I know it's mine?"...
Hah.
Listen dude, have you heard of DNA?
LOL...
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His "jock" brain was just searching for excuses. He knows...or at least... he should know.
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It's, as always, preprogrammed built in misogyny. Thank goodness not every male is contaminated!
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99% of them "KNOW" --it's just such a world made for men, still...
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Why is it young men who seem to think they are most entitled to live their lives absent from their errors in judgement?
I'm already lecturing my two grandsons!
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Or so they think! The lion(ess) roars! This one has lost her power but deep inside in a secret cavern she knows it still exists. Thus the effort to write again. A lot of young guys thinking blowing steam makes them so macho when it actually just covers up their weaknesses.
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
This chapter is definitely taking an even more serious turn. Gabby meets with her boyfriend, as they discuss the baby and its implications. We can see Jason totally blames Gabby like it's all her fault.
Then, there's this letter, which is our new mystery.
I'm almost caught up, dear lady!!
Hugs,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2024
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This chapter is definitely taking an even more serious turn. Gabby meets with her boyfriend, as they discuss the baby and its implications. We can see Jason totally blames Gabby like it's all her fault.
Then, there's this letter, which is our new mystery.
I'm almost caught up, dear lady!!
Hugs,
Rhonda
Comment Written 04-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2024
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Bravo! Rhonda.... I'm thrilled that you are enjoying the story...unfortunately it will have more serious turns! That's how my personal life goes so I seem to weave it into my writing. Good therapy, I hope.
Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from Carol Clark2
Why do guys always blame the girl when there's an unexpected pregnancy? Your dialogue between Jason and Gabby is so realistic. You left us on the cliff by stopping here, with the letter on the floor of the car. Great chapter!
Blessings. Carol
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2024
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Why do guys always blame the girl when there's an unexpected pregnancy? Your dialogue between Jason and Gabby is so realistic. You left us on the cliff by stopping here, with the letter on the floor of the car. Great chapter!
Blessings. Carol
Comment Written 03-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2024
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Gotta love those cliff hangers!!! It's a sad word we live in when people - male or female - don't feel they should take responsibility for their actions. Rich or poor...they feel entitled. So sad!
Hugs, Carol
Comment from lyenochka
Well, I hope Jason grows up really fast. He needs to take responsibility for his actions as Gabby didn't get pregnant on her own. I guess he has no thought about how she is feeling or even the difficulty of a pregnant girl to reach down even if she's not that advanced in the pregnancy.
I think you brought us into Gabby's world well with the memories of her mom. I think some of step to step details could be removed like the tissue and temperature of the shower.
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2024
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Well, I hope Jason grows up really fast. He needs to take responsibility for his actions as Gabby didn't get pregnant on her own. I guess he has no thought about how she is feeling or even the difficulty of a pregnant girl to reach down even if she's not that advanced in the pregnancy.
I think you brought us into Gabby's world well with the memories of her mom. I think some of step to step details could be removed like the tissue and temperature of the shower.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2024
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Jason's been raised from early childhood to keep his eye on the "ball" and hasn't grasped his responsibility with Gabby. I appreciate you reading and reviewing, Helen. Prepare yourself for life's nose-dives.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
It's all about him, what a toe-rag! But typical of many young men/boys. It doesn't matter that it's about to ruin her life! Oh that makes me so angry. If I were in her shoes, I'd tell him just what a slimeball he is, and that he's done her a favour. At least she knows what a low-life he is. Now what will she really do? I can't wait to find out. Amazing chapter my friend. Well done. :)) Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2024
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It's all about him, what a toe-rag! But typical of many young men/boys. It doesn't matter that it's about to ruin her life! Oh that makes me so angry. If I were in her shoes, I'd tell him just what a slimeball he is, and that he's done her a favour. At least she knows what a low-life he is. Now what will she really do? I can't wait to find out. Amazing chapter my friend. Well done. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment Written 03-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2024
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A toe-rag! I love it and thanks for the chuckle this early morning. Gabby has faced a lot of trauma in her life, but she remains steadfast to find her way out of it. Yes, for a moment, she trusted Jason, believing in the dream, but when things come crashing down, she's frightened but determined.
Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from Ric Myworld
As always, descriptive writing at its best, right down to the groaning tree. I don't know that I've said it before, but I've learned so much from your sentences plumb back to the leprechaun stories. Your writing has caused me to pay more attention to word choices in every sentence, one by one. And I'm sure I'll never catch up to you. :-) Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2024
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As always, descriptive writing at its best, right down to the groaning tree. I don't know that I've said it before, but I've learned so much from your sentences plumb back to the leprechaun stories. Your writing has caused me to pay more attention to word choices in every sentence, one by one. And I'm sure I'll never catch up to you. :-) Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2024
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Oh, you actually remember dear ole Frankie. I'm touched! But I certainly doubt I've taught you anything when it comes to writing. You take the bull by the horns and plow right through those fields. You are the best! Thanks for the smile!
Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from BethShelby
Thoughts of love can change quidkly when something comes between what might interfere with your plans for your life. Suddenly it seems the part you played was minor and you need to blame it all on someone else. I'm anxious to know what happens next.
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2024
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Thoughts of love can change quidkly when something comes between what might interfere with your plans for your life. Suddenly it seems the part you played was minor and you need to blame it all on someone else. I'm anxious to know what happens next.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2024
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Thanks for stopping by, Beth. Like reallife, this story will have its ups and definitely take some nose dives. Its a small town where everyone thinks they know every one's business...Bad things will happen to good people.
Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from Teri7
This is a very good chapter that has me sitting on the edge of my seat waiting to see what happens now. You used great dialogue and very good descriptive words. love and blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2024
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This is a very good chapter that has me sitting on the edge of my seat waiting to see what happens now. You used great dialogue and very good descriptive words. love and blessings, Teri
Comment Written 02-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2024
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Thank you Teri for stopping by to read and review. I appreciate it very much. Smiles, Carol
Comment from Dawn Munro
What a terrific cliffhanger ending to this chapter. The whole thing is beautifully written, the characters believable, the dialogue and descriptions -- everything. I wish I had a six for you -- this is most deserving of that rating, IMHO.
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2024
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What a terrific cliffhanger ending to this chapter. The whole thing is beautifully written, the characters believable, the dialogue and descriptions -- everything. I wish I had a six for you -- this is most deserving of that rating, IMHO.
Comment Written 02-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2024
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Nice to see you, Dawn. Thank you for stopping by to read and review this chapter. I appreciate your comments and thoughts.
Smiles, Carol