Winner
80 words7 total reviews
Comment from pome lover
VERY GOOD! this should be posted in every school. It's up beat and true.
It's a very good message and great presentation!!
Congrats on winning (and sharing :)
Katharine
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VERY GOOD! this should be posted in every school. It's up beat and true.
It's a very good message and great presentation!!
Congrats on winning (and sharing :)
Katharine
Comment Written 05-Feb-2024
Comment from Jeano
Cleverly done. Good advice isn't always popular, especially with the youth. Not sure if you dug this up from a true story or just made it up, but either way, it works. If nothing else, it might plant that needed seed in the minds of the drug enhanced, but they're usually the last to take good advice. Thanks for sharing.
Write on,
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Cleverly done. Good advice isn't always popular, especially with the youth. Not sure if you dug this up from a true story or just made it up, but either way, it works. If nothing else, it might plant that needed seed in the minds of the drug enhanced, but they're usually the last to take good advice. Thanks for sharing.
Write on,
Comment Written 22-Jan-2024
Comment from jessizero
I like that you wrote a frame story with a poem. I didn't count your words, but you seem to have done a good job with that. Thank you for sharing, and best wishes to you.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2024
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I like that you wrote a frame story with a poem. I didn't count your words, but you seem to have done a good job with that. Thank you for sharing, and best wishes to you.
Comment Written 21-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2024
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Thanks for your review. Exactly 80 words as per Microsoft Word.
Comment from Mario PIERRE
This is a nicely woven flash story. It also tackles a delicate and current subject: drug abuse. I liked the tone throughout, the ending, especially the rhyming liners: math kid/meth kid etc... Very well thought of!
Good luck.
PS: there's a typo which you could review: In the last line: 'one word;' - a semi-colon would probably be used instead of the ;
Mario
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This is a nicely woven flash story. It also tackles a delicate and current subject: drug abuse. I liked the tone throughout, the ending, especially the rhyming liners: math kid/meth kid etc... Very well thought of!
Good luck.
PS: there's a typo which you could review: In the last line: 'one word;' - a semi-colon would probably be used instead of the ;
Mario
Comment Written 20-Jan-2024
Comment from lancellot
This is structurally well crafted. But it is entirely narrative. It needs a stronger subject, and a more discernable plot for the story element to stad out. You would normally want to hook and engage the reader on some level with a flash fiction.
This is good. Good luck in the contest voting.
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This is structurally well crafted. But it is entirely narrative. It needs a stronger subject, and a more discernable plot for the story element to stad out. You would normally want to hook and engage the reader on some level with a flash fiction.
This is good. Good luck in the contest voting.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2024
Comment from Brenda Strauser
I enjoyed this poem. Very well written. Drugs are such a big problem. A friend of mine was addicted at a young age. In and out of rehab for years. I liked the way you had something positive for the students to think about.. Great job
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I enjoyed this poem. Very well written. Drugs are such a big problem. A friend of mine was addicted at a young age. In and out of rehab for years. I liked the way you had something positive for the students to think about.. Great job
Comment Written 20-Jan-2024
Comment from T.A. Walk
Who ever understands school administration that isn't school administration...
Well done, 80 words is tough!! The image fits well. Love the poem tucked into the story, too!
No SPAG critique to offer. Thank you and good luck!!
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Who ever understands school administration that isn't school administration...
Well done, 80 words is tough!! The image fits well. Love the poem tucked into the story, too!
No SPAG critique to offer. Thank you and good luck!!
Comment Written 20-Jan-2024
