Comment from BermyBye50

Exceptional

This is a exceptional entry for the Tercets ~ Terza Rima contest. Your carefully crafted short poem of 3 stanzas brilliantly includes a tercet about nature, humanity, and animals. The rhyme scheme of aba, bcb, cdc is beautifully crafted and flows smoothly when read. This is the number one contender in this contest.

All the best in the contest,

Eugene

 Comment Written 23-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 23-Dec-2023

Hello Eugene, I thank you so very much for this lovely review and the comments about the Terza Rima. I am thrilled you liked it!!

Melissa

Comment from tempeste

Excellent

Ciao sugarray, you now have 5 votes.

I love the setting and the melancholic vibe.

You have a knack for seasonal poems .. do you live near a lake or a body of water... your words truly bring to life the aquatic world.

Best of luck!

 Comment Written 23-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 23-Dec-2023

Thank you so much for your wonderful review and vote, Franca. You are a dear. We don't live on a lake, but I have a fondness for loons and have listened to them on YouTube. Hugs and Merry Christmas!

Melissa

Comment from Wendy G

Excellent

How very beautiful. Nature, and indeed animals, will have that effect of making man-made shackles fall away. Very well expressed with lovely imagery, very vivid. Best wishes for the contest.
Wendy

 Comment Written 23-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 23-Dec-2023

Thank you so much, Wendy. I am delighted you like it.

Melissa

Comment from Lisasview

Excellent

Good morning Sugarray,
I know you want feedback on your words but I could not find any fault with them..
I think they are perfect... I love metaphors... Oh yes, okay one thought... Your end rhymes are great but I can not seem to find your internal rhyme?
Lisa

 Comment Written 23-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 23-Dec-2023

Thank you so much, Lisa. The internal rhyme is in the first verse of the second stanza. Much appreciated.

Melissa

reply by Lisasview on 24-Dec-2023

Hi Melissa,
My mistake, I was looking for it in the same verse..
Lisa

Comment from Sarah Tummey

Excellent

I like Terza Rima, reading and writing them. I enjoyed yours, even though it's not clear from the writing prompt whether they'll accept it. Looks to me like they just wanted a 3-line poem? But hopefully they'll be ok with yours having more than one stanza because it's very well-written.

 Comment Written 22-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 22-Dec-2023

Thank you very much Sarah. I hope so too. Thank you for your lovely comments about it. :)

Melissa

Comment from Bill Schott

Excellent

This terza rima, A Wailing Croon, has the proper formatting and reminds the readers that the life we enjoy will one day become part of the big enjoy.

 Comment Written 22-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 22-Dec-2023

Hey there Bill ~ thank you, my friend.

Melissa

Comment from Carol Clark2

Exceptional

I love the many ways you described the sound of the loon. I also like the metaphor of the silky night. Nice job on the rhyme scheme and the meter, as well as the descriptive language of the poem. Blessings. Carol

 Comment Written 21-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 21-Dec-2023

Aww, thank you so very much, Carol. I am delighted you liked my Terza Rima. It has been quite a while since I have used that form... but, the contest calls for tercets, so I thought it would be a good choice. So appreciate your comments.

Melissa

reply by Carol Clark2 on 22-Dec-2023

You did a lovely job on it. Hope you have a blessed Christmas.

Comment from Ginda Simpson

Excellent

This is exquisite. Your words are like skilled brush strokes that capture this landscape to perfection; I am a painter. I wish I had a six, no a seven, for this.

 Comment Written 21-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 21-Dec-2023

Hello Ginda. You made my day with this review. I so appreciate your comments and viewpoint on this verse. Thanks so much!

Melissa

Comment from Ulla

Excellent

So are you taking another class of Jim's ? I loved this poem, Melissa, but I can only comment on what the words mean to me. As you know, I don't know the first thing about poetry. Ulla:xcx

 Comment Written 21-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 21-Dec-2023

Hey Ulla, no I'm not in a class now. This poem is for a contest that opens tomorrow. It is for tercets and I expanded it into three tercets (overachiever ;) and that particular rhyme scheme makes it a Terza Rima... anyway, I'm glad you liked it. :). Thank you.

Melissa

Comment from Verna Cole Mitchell

Excellent

I enjoyed your poem, with onomatopoeia in each stanza. Your line combined to create a somber mood. My favorite phrase is "lonesome
cadence of the loon." This is very well done.

 Comment Written 21-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 21-Dec-2023

Hello Verna. Thank you for your lovely review and comments. I enjoyed crafting this one because I especially like loons and their calls. Hugs!

Melissa