Date Night
A story you can really get your teeth into!32 total reviews
Comment from nomi338
Some people are so dense they walk right into a disastrous situation with their eyes wide open, yet failing to see what is right in front of them, they fall prey to destruction. Instead of running away, they walk openly into the midst of the fire. They then have the nerve to ask why they got burned. Good job of narrative storytelling.
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2023
  |
Some people are so dense they walk right into a disastrous situation with their eyes wide open, yet failing to see what is right in front of them, they fall prey to destruction. Instead of running away, they walk openly into the midst of the fire. They then have the nerve to ask why they got burned. Good job of narrative storytelling.
Comment Written 25-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2023
-
Thank you so much for your insightful review!
Comment from Jacob1395
This was really excellent, and I loved how you managed to tell a complete story using just dialogue, and I was totally immersed in it. I was skeptical of her claims at first, but I loved how you ended it. It flowed really well and the two characters both really stood out. I can see why it won the contest.
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2023
|
This was really excellent, and I loved how you managed to tell a complete story using just dialogue, and I was totally immersed in it. I was skeptical of her claims at first, but I loved how you ended it. It flowed really well and the two characters both really stood out. I can see why it won the contest.
Comment Written 25-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2023
-
Thank you so much - I really appreciate your feedback! :)
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
That was a fabulous story! And, of course you would win. Now if a man came up to me and said he was a he-wolf, I'd run, and not look back! This was so creative and thoroughly enjoyable. Well done and congratulations! :)) Sandra xx
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2023
|
That was a fabulous story! And, of course you would win. Now if a man came up to me and said he was a he-wolf, I'd run, and not look back! This was so creative and thoroughly enjoyable. Well done and congratulations! :)) Sandra xx
Comment Written 25-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2023
-
Thank you so much, Sandra! xx
Comment from gramalot8
You did an excellent job with your dialogue only storyline. I really like your characters interactions.
I actually could believe this was really happening between the boy and girl. Thanks for sharing this story and good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2023
|
You did an excellent job with your dialogue only storyline. I really like your characters interactions.
I actually could believe this was really happening between the boy and girl. Thanks for sharing this story and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 25-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2023
-
Thank you so much!
Comment from GWHARGIS
This was very entertaining. I would probably feel exactly like the guy though. But the elaborate story seemed to do the trick. At least, he believed her but by then, well, it was too late. As they say 'another one bites the dust'. Great story and good luck in the contest. Gretchen
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
|
This was very entertaining. I would probably feel exactly like the guy though. But the elaborate story seemed to do the trick. At least, he believed her but by then, well, it was too late. As they say 'another one bites the dust'. Great story and good luck in the contest. Gretchen
Comment Written 24-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
-
Thank you! :)
Comment from Barry Penfold
Very good dialogue which told the story extremely well. A clever way to present the story actually. Obviously the judges felt it was good. Well done and keep up the good writing. Always good to read.
All the best
Barry Penfold.
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
|
Very good dialogue which told the story extremely well. A clever way to present the story actually. Obviously the judges felt it was good. Well done and keep up the good writing. Always good to read.
All the best
Barry Penfold.
Comment Written 24-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
-
Thank you so much! :)
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
You sure made it sound real; I have watched these kinds of movies and I freak out when the face is no longer human. There is a lot to science fiction, and I would base your story on just that type of story.
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2023
|
You sure made it sound real; I have watched these kinds of movies and I freak out when the face is no longer human. There is a lot to science fiction, and I would base your story on just that type of story.
Comment Written 22-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2023
-
Thank you!
Comment from Daylily
This is fascinating...so well written. Werewolves are always a scary thing and I like that she is trying to protect the guy who continues to remain sceptic until there is no doubt.
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2023
 |
This is fascinating...so well written. Werewolves are always a scary thing and I like that she is trying to protect the guy who continues to remain sceptic until there is no doubt.
Comment Written 22-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2023
-
Thank you so much for this positive feedback and especially for the very generous six stars! xx
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
Hi Mystery Fantasy Writer!
A very engaging story about a girl who's trying to tell an admirer why she can't go out on a date with him. She's very direct about why, but he insists on not believable until it's too late. You leave the reader wondering the outcome, but we're pretty sure it's not going to be good.
The dialogue was easy to follow, but if you want, you might want give setting clues and names in the conversation to help develop set the stage. Great story, though, and a good response to the prompt.
Good luck in the contest,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2023
|
Hi Mystery Fantasy Writer!
A very engaging story about a girl who's trying to tell an admirer why she can't go out on a date with him. She's very direct about why, but he insists on not believable until it's too late. You leave the reader wondering the outcome, but we're pretty sure it's not going to be good.
The dialogue was easy to follow, but if you want, you might want give setting clues and names in the conversation to help develop set the stage. Great story, though, and a good response to the prompt.
Good luck in the contest,
Rhonda
Comment Written 22-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2023
-
Thank you very much for the feedback and suggestions, Rhonda - much appreciated.
Comment from prettybluebirds
You have done an excellent job with the writing prompt. I love the ending. It kind of leaves the reader hanging and wondering what happened next. You should write a sequel to this. Best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2023
|
You have done an excellent job with the writing prompt. I love the ending. It kind of leaves the reader hanging and wondering what happened next. You should write a sequel to this. Best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 21-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 21-Nov-2023
-
Thank you so much - possibly that may be on the cards at some point in the future! If so, I think the sequel might be in the third person. :)