It all clicks
Confidence and conflict lost and found2 total reviews
Comment from Navada
Congratulations on submitting your first post here at FanStory and welcome! I liked the way you explored the theme of loss and how it operates as a trigger. The couplet "I need to feel secure/Or else self destruction is a tempting lure" is really powerful. I'm sure this is something that many people can relate to and it can definitely have lifelong consequences for a person. Some food for thought for next time - you have some nice rhyming couplets like the one I quoted, but there are a few other lines without rhymes that you might like to find partners for, just to strengthen the overall effect. Thanks so much for sharing this and best of luck in your first contest!
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Congratulations on submitting your first post here at FanStory and welcome! I liked the way you explored the theme of loss and how it operates as a trigger. The couplet "I need to feel secure/Or else self destruction is a tempting lure" is really powerful. I'm sure this is something that many people can relate to and it can definitely have lifelong consequences for a person. Some food for thought for next time - you have some nice rhyming couplets like the one I quoted, but there are a few other lines without rhymes that you might like to find partners for, just to strengthen the overall effect. Thanks so much for sharing this and best of luck in your first contest!
Comment Written 08-Nov-2023
Comment from Lea Tonin1
Some good rhyming scheme in there too! Sounds like the person in your Palm's gone full circle. Run the whole gamut and come back to realize. That's what your poem says to me, it's a great submission. Welcome to fanstory! I encourage you to keep writing! You definitely have talent. This is a great first submission. I look forward to next one, have a great night!
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Some good rhyming scheme in there too! Sounds like the person in your Palm's gone full circle. Run the whole gamut and come back to realize. That's what your poem says to me, it's a great submission. Welcome to fanstory! I encourage you to keep writing! You definitely have talent. This is a great first submission. I look forward to next one, have a great night!
Comment Written 08-Nov-2023