In Real Time
Viewing comments for Chapter 9 "The Conductor"Stories of the Here and Now
9 total reviews
Comment from damommy
This was a tad long, but I enjoyed every minute of it. I, too, think about the people I encounter and wonder what their lives are about. Sometimes, I make up stories about them. Is that weird?
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2023
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This was a tad long, but I enjoyed every minute of it. I, too, think about the people I encounter and wonder what their lives are about. Sometimes, I make up stories about them. Is that weird?
Comment Written 29-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2023
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Thanks for the excellent review and your perspective on the piece. Observing life and imagining the lives of people around you are what make you a writer. I am glad the story seemed vibrant and colorful enough to hold your attention through the length. I had a lot of fun creating the characters in this story and writing the dialogue. estory
Comment from Ulla
Hi estory, it's a very interesting story, and a peep into what it would be like to be a train driver. You give us a glimpse of what it might be e like. I liked the conversations as well. To some it might seem like a glamorous job, but I can appreciate the hard work. I was a flight attendant, after all.
As always this is very well written. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2023
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Hi estory, it's a very interesting story, and a peep into what it would be like to be a train driver. You give us a glimpse of what it might be e like. I liked the conversations as well. To some it might seem like a glamorous job, but I can appreciate the hard work. I was a flight attendant, after all.
As always this is very well written. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 28-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2023
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Thanks for the excellent review and your perspective on it. Yeah, this was right up your alley, I guess. I had a lot of fun actually creating the characters in this, and writing the dialogue. What I tried to articulate is this strange, tenuous connection to people around us that we have as we move through the world. I love travelling by train, I went New York to Toronto and New York to Carolina four times. I want to take a trip cross country to the west in a sleeper car. estory
Comment from Annmuma
I enjoyed this piece, though I wish the font was a bit larger and easier to see. Very creative premise and I believe I've met most of the characters you presented. Thanks for writing.
One tiny spag: talking their head off -- should be 'heads'
ann
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2023
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I enjoyed this piece, though I wish the font was a bit larger and easier to see. Very creative premise and I believe I've met most of the characters you presented. Thanks for writing.
One tiny spag: talking their head off -- should be 'heads'
ann
Comment Written 28-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2023
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Thanks for the excellent review and your advice. I don't know if it's good or bad that you've met some of these characters in real life. LOL estory
Comment from BethShelby
People are a lot more complicated the landscapes you can find you exchanges with them interesting, You know what you're thinking but you can never really know what is going on in their heads. As a writer you can base a charactrer off of what you're observed and they they become yours to manipulate. Then you can get into their heads. Landscapes are awe inspiring and relaxing. You can trust them to reman as your see them. You can never truly know a person you meet casually. I find people very interesting but scenic landscapes of love. They are more trustworthy than people.
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2023
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People are a lot more complicated the landscapes you can find you exchanges with them interesting, You know what you're thinking but you can never really know what is going on in their heads. As a writer you can base a charactrer off of what you're observed and they they become yours to manipulate. Then you can get into their heads. Landscapes are awe inspiring and relaxing. You can trust them to reman as your see them. You can never truly know a person you meet casually. I find people very interesting but scenic landscapes of love. They are more trustworthy than people.
Comment Written 28-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2023
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Thanks for the excellent review and your words of support and perspective on the theme here. Landscapes are lovely, maybe, but they wear away on you. In the end, I wish I had more pictures of people, the people who loved me and who I loved, rather than all the landscapes I took. That was one thing I tried to get across here; We are on a journey here with the people around us, for better or worse. estory
Comment from barbara.wilkey
A few years ago, my husband and I took an Amtrak to L. A. We had a great trip and a lot of fun. We met so many interesting people. I have heard that Amtrak is struggling right now. I hope not. I enjoyed reading. Thank ou for sharing.
Ah, here you are again sir," I said to him one morning. (comma after 'again', you're addressing 'sir')
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2023
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A few years ago, my husband and I took an Amtrak to L. A. We had a great trip and a lot of fun. We met so many interesting people. I have heard that Amtrak is struggling right now. I hope not. I enjoyed reading. Thank ou for sharing.
Ah, here you are again sir," I said to him one morning. (comma after 'again', you're addressing 'sir')
Comment Written 27-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2023
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Thanks for the excellent review and your perspective on the story and also the words about Amtrak. I have taken a few trips on Amtrak; NY to Toronto, and NY to Raleigh. I want to go Raleigh to Utah in a sleeper. Every time I took the train from New York to Raleigh it was packed. I think they are OK, maybe the pandemic stung them a bit, but train travel is cheap and it will always be around. And it is an adventure, not a trip. estory
Comment from JPGeo
This was a really intersting and enjoyable read. You did a great job of researching the train names and routes. My favorites character was the Southern Charmer who tried to book a night in the conductor's berth. I noticed three spellings you may clean up, "magnificent" in the first line, "Lake George" and "powdered" in your description of our lady friend. Otherwise, just good stuff!
Best wishes on your poetry endeavor.
John
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2023
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This was a really intersting and enjoyable read. You did a great job of researching the train names and routes. My favorites character was the Southern Charmer who tried to book a night in the conductor's berth. I noticed three spellings you may clean up, "magnificent" in the first line, "Lake George" and "powdered" in your description of our lady friend. Otherwise, just good stuff!
Best wishes on your poetry endeavor.
John
Comment Written 26-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2023
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Thanks for the excellent review and your comments in support of this piece. I am glad the characters came out so strong, I really enjoyed writing the dialogue that fleshed them out. will take a look at the spag. estory
Comment from royowen
You've obviously thought a lot about being in the shoes of a train conductor, I guess I'm not the only one who ponders and observes, but I think that writer must be a little more questioning and imaginative of what it would be like to have such a job. I love this, because of the situations and mental encounters on has. I found this to be most absorbing and perceptive of posts, well done, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2023
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You've obviously thought a lot about being in the shoes of a train conductor, I guess I'm not the only one who ponders and observes, but I think that writer must be a little more questioning and imaginative of what it would be like to have such a job. I love this, because of the situations and mental encounters on has. I found this to be most absorbing and perceptive of posts, well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 26-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2023
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Thanks for the excellent review and your wonderful comments in support of the piece. I am glad you enjoyed it, it was fun to write and I think sometimes those the ones that come out the best. Writers are observers of the human experience, and articulators of it, I believe. It's great to hear words of encouragement like this. It keeps me going. estory
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Well done
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
This is an excellent story and it offers a different perspective. I enjoy when Art or Writing, offers new perspectives. Mark Twain wrote a short story involving a train too. Trains are great settings and also offer the symbolic movement from one place through and to, others.
Your presentation is very good, too. You also use descriptive words and colorful imagery that draw in a reader.
Best wishes!
Alexandra
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2023
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This is an excellent story and it offers a different perspective. I enjoy when Art or Writing, offers new perspectives. Mark Twain wrote a short story involving a train too. Trains are great settings and also offer the symbolic movement from one place through and to, others.
Your presentation is very good, too. You also use descriptive words and colorful imagery that draw in a reader.
Best wishes!
Alexandra
Comment Written 26-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2023
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Thanks for the excellent review and your wonderful words of support for the piece. Glad you enjoyed it. I had fun creating these characters, and I am glad they came over so well. I love travelling on trains; I have done New York to Toronto, and New York to Raleigh a few times, I want to go cross country by train someday and see the west. So I think that love of trains and the observance of people on the train came through in the story as well. estory
Comment from Douglas Goff
This was certainly interesting, although very long. I've never really thought about the life of a train conductor but they must meet every type of person there is.
I saw no errors in the writing although I was a bit wrapped up in the story.
Enjoyable!
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2023
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This was certainly interesting, although very long. I've never really thought about the life of a train conductor but they must meet every type of person there is.
I saw no errors in the writing although I was a bit wrapped up in the story.
Enjoyable!
Comment Written 26-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2023
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Thanks for the excellent review and your comments in support of the piece. To split it into segments would have damaged the flow of the story in my opinion; I know people here have a short attention span, but it really only takes fifteen minutes or so to read. I am glad it seemed so absorbing, and that you got wrapped up in it. That's the best compliment anyone can give me. There were a couple of spags I'll try and clean up estory
