Reviews from

Saving Mr. Calvin

Viewing comments for Chapter 25 "Saving Mr. Calvin - Chapter 20C"
Golf's legacy and future

16 total reviews 
Comment from Carol Clark2
Excellent
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This chapter reads verr well, and I'm glad the foursome has won. I hope the losers don't decide to seek revenge. Good story overall. Have a blessed weekend. Carol

 Comment Written 25-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 25-Aug-2023
    Thank you, Carol. I'm done with those losers now, so I guess we'll never know.
reply by Carol Clark2 on 25-Aug-2023
    Good to know their damage is minimal.
Comment from Jay Squires
Excellent
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That's odd. I could have sworn I reviewed this. I know I'd read it shortly after it posted. (Now I remember! I finished reading it before dinner, thinking I would review it after ate and did my exercises. I still don't remember why I didn't review it.)

It was a satisfying chapter. The newlywed's dallying before they left the bedroom for dinner (dallying by suggestion only) yanked this book out of the hands of the youngsters I'd suggested it should be targeted to.

Good addition to the story.

 Comment Written 22-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 23-Aug-2023
    Yeah, I'm thinking perhaps older YA (16+) and adults. There will be some more of this in Part 2.
Comment from w.j.debi
Excellent
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Okay, you make golf far more interesting than I have ever found watching it on T.V. I usually walk out and go find something else to do.
Excellent sense of drama as you build the tension between the players and if they will complete their strokes successfully.
Yeah! They won!

 Comment Written 22-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 22-Aug-2023
    Unless you understand the subtleties of the game, it is rather hard to watch on TV. What really helps is recording it in advance and having a DVR or a streaming service that allows fast-forwarding through the action that's not particularly interesting (and the commercials) and concentrating on the leaders or your favorite players. That's kind of how I watch them these days.

    Thanks for your great review, debi.
reply by w.j.debi on 22-Aug-2023
    Ah, a way to miss all the down time. Thank you.
Comment from Julie Lau
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Your story is going so well Jim, and it must be especially enjoyable for your fellow lovers of the game. I love the inventive trickery that goes on when money is at stake. Thank goodness the good guys won!
Julie

 Comment Written 22-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 22-Aug-2023
    Thanks so much, Julie, for your very kind 6-star review. I've also tried to keep it interesting for the non-golfers, which is actually most of the readership.
Comment from jmdg1954
Excellent
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A rousing hip-hip-hooray to the victors.

I can easily see your love of the game coming through in your writing. You're taking us on an exciting journey in the development of the sport.
I'm looking forward to be seeing what's next.

Cheers.
John

 Comment Written 22-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 22-Aug-2023
    Thanks very much, John. I can't play it anymore, but I still love to write about it. I had a 60-year playing career and loved every minute of it until the very end when I just had to give it up due to the infirmities of age.

    Still lots more to come.
Comment from lancellot
Excellent
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Well, this well written. It does seem to go by the numbers. I'm just saying, there were no surprises, and the bad guys may have been too cliche in classic bad guy characteristics. I would reconsider how they are crafted in the revision stage.

"Miserable kut! You tricked me with this piece of stront," he said as he threw the ball hard to the ground at her feet.

A sly smile came over her.

- Didn't you say, they wanted to beat the bad guys, not win. But if they cheated, then...

 Comment Written 21-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 21-Aug-2023
    You have a point. They aren't really cheating because there is no rule disallowing any kind of equipment at this point (like there is today), but they certainly are taking advantage of the other team's ignorance about what a smooth ball does. That does seem a bit inconsistent with what I said earlier, but at least they get to make these guys look like fools in the process, whereas a simple forfeit the scoundrels could turn around and claim that their loss was solely due to the rules. But you definitely have a point.
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
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Hooray for the satisfying finish. And you added that tension at the very end because we didn't know how that ball teetering on the cup would fall. But thanks to the crowd and thunder, it worked out perfectly. Glad that Arie and the official made up amiably as good sports folks should!

 Comment Written 21-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 21-Aug-2023
    Yes, he was a decent chap, and Arie had been rude to him, so all's well now. I hated breaking that chapter up in fear that it wouldn't maintain the excitement and tension, but it was just too long to post at once. Glad to hear it still contained some tension.
Comment from royowen
Excellent
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What a very satisfying end to this marvellous story Jim. The two nasties got theirs in more ways than one, and if they are capable of taking their medicine like true men, them perhaps they may prosper, but suspects a proud man never learns. Beautifully written Jim, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 21-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 21-Aug-2023
    Thanks, Roy. It's only the match that's over, and we still have a long way to go in the whole story. Hope it keeps your interest to stay with it.
reply by royowen on 21-Aug-2023
    Looking forward
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
Excellent
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Of course we knew the A-team would win, but certainly the way in which they did was a surprise. And I like that the crowd - and the gods above - had a hand in the victory.

Now that the game has been established, the word of it is out, and the first competition is won, what will be next, I wonder? Are we going back to the future? We shall see!

Sentence using "it finally dawned on him that perhaps" - you use "shots" twice in the sentence. Sub "hits"?


 Comment Written 21-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 21-Aug-2023
    Fortune favors the good in this case. We'll be wrapping things up in Holland in the next 2 chapters, and then ???

    Good catch. I made the change. Thanks!
Comment from Ulla
Excellent
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Aw, how great was that. They did everything.to win without actually cheating, but then again maybe they did cheat in their.own ways. I really liked the chapter. Now to the last two. Ulla:)))

 Comment Written 21-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 21-Aug-2023
    Thanks, Ulla. Not exactly cheating, but perhaps a bit unethical taking advantage of their ignorance about smooth balls. But I don't feel sorry for them. They deserve at least that.