A Poetic Pause
Viewing comments for Chapter 31 "The Rise"First Poems
5 total reviews
Comment from Lordinajamjar
Wow!
Leah, I was caught in your words' upward draft and I was reminded of these words by GK. Chesterton. "The traveler sees what he sees, the tourist sees what he has come to see."
So the traveler sees everything along his path. Whereas I think of the tourist, the goal setter, as the essence of your poem. One who misses out on the beauty of life and the introduction of lifelong friends.
Anyway, that's my take on it. :)
I loved it.
John
reply by the author on 16-Aug-2023
Wow!
Leah, I was caught in your words' upward draft and I was reminded of these words by GK. Chesterton. "The traveler sees what he sees, the tourist sees what he has come to see."
So the traveler sees everything along his path. Whereas I think of the tourist, the goal setter, as the essence of your poem. One who misses out on the beauty of life and the introduction of lifelong friends.
Anyway, that's my take on it. :)
I loved it.
John
Comment Written 15-Aug-2023
reply by the author on 16-Aug-2023
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Your insight is spot on! I'm so glad you like it! The phrase "it's lonely at the top" started this poem and then expanded into what it is. Thank you for your kind words, review and fine rating! Hope your day us great !
Comment from Isabel Fontes
Feeling purposeful at the top, yet alone. I enjoyed your wordplay and metaphors.
Maybe having everything isn't gold. I must say that your poem left me with a sense of purpose and accomplishment, but at the same time, I couldn't shake off the feeling of loneliness.
Your clever use of words to draw a parallel between life and climbs was truly impressive.
Your poem made me realize that having everything in life doesn't necessarily mean that one has attained true happiness and contentment.
Great poem.
All in all, it was a great piece of work that I thoroughly enjoyed reading
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2023
Feeling purposeful at the top, yet alone. I enjoyed your wordplay and metaphors.
Maybe having everything isn't gold. I must say that your poem left me with a sense of purpose and accomplishment, but at the same time, I couldn't shake off the feeling of loneliness.
Your clever use of words to draw a parallel between life and climbs was truly impressive.
Your poem made me realize that having everything in life doesn't necessarily mean that one has attained true happiness and contentment.
Great poem.
All in all, it was a great piece of work that I thoroughly enjoyed reading
Comment Written 10-Aug-2023
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2023
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Thank you very much for that, I'm always happy to see your comments come through as you are very insightful and always have valuable things to say and offer.
Thank you so much again I look forward to your reviews have a great day!
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You are most welcome, Lea!
Comment from JT traveller
Alone when the rise ends? Do you ever feel alone at the top? A most profound and thought provoking poem. It delivered a lot of energy. My senses were heightened. Thank you, my friend, Lea. Jacqueline xx
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2023
Alone when the rise ends? Do you ever feel alone at the top? A most profound and thought provoking poem. It delivered a lot of energy. My senses were heightened. Thank you, my friend, Lea. Jacqueline xx
Comment Written 09-Aug-2023
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2023
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Thank you once again for your kind and insightful words.
You've definitely got the Idea for sure, I kept thinking about the phrase. It's lonely at the top and I saw that picture and I went okay. That's interesting, let's go from there, so here we have it. Thank you for your review always pleased to see you enjoy your day chat soon!
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Another stirring verse as your imagination soars in this metaphor of a bird seeking a refuge of forgetfulness and solitude on the branches of that rather precariously positioned tree:) A lovely, dreamy and inspirational poem. Well done, Lea. Debbie
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2023
Another stirring verse as your imagination soars in this metaphor of a bird seeking a refuge of forgetfulness and solitude on the branches of that rather precariously positioned tree:) A lovely, dreamy and inspirational poem. Well done, Lea. Debbie
Comment Written 09-Aug-2023
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2023
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Thank you debbie as always your insight is on par. I'm really glad you liked it. Yeah, I kept thinking of the phrase it's lonely at the top and then I thought but I'm afraid of heights personally, and that's all that. I'm really glad you liked them thankful for your review and I hope you have the best of days!
Comment from JSD
Well done Lea, again. As I have said before, I think our styles match really well. I love the metaphor here and the economy of words. You don't need more, but leave the reader to work the rest out, and that is how it should be. It's a bird, or it's a climber, or it's about life. Three levels. Just excellent. I love the way you progress upwards and gain forgetfulness as you leave the earth behind. Maybe the sky shouldn't be tepid, although it is an excellently surprising word? Should it not be fresh? Refreshing? Bracing?
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2023
Well done Lea, again. As I have said before, I think our styles match really well. I love the metaphor here and the economy of words. You don't need more, but leave the reader to work the rest out, and that is how it should be. It's a bird, or it's a climber, or it's about life. Three levels. Just excellent. I love the way you progress upwards and gain forgetfulness as you leave the earth behind. Maybe the sky shouldn't be tepid, although it is an excellently surprising word? Should it not be fresh? Refreshing? Bracing?
Comment Written 09-Aug-2023
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2023
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Wow thank you again I really wow you made my day!