Comment from Verna Cole Mitchell

Excellent

This is delightful to read, really fun. It's a challenge to rhyme each line. You did it well. I did wonder if you used "sung" to rhyme with flung? This life-long English teacher says it needed to be "sang." It would be correct if you'd used "I'd" before sung. I enjoy reading what you write! I can commiserate with you on being "out of the money" in the contest! If you ever have a grammar question, message me.

 Comment Written 24-Jul-2023

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reply by the author on 24-Jul-2023

It is just a meaningless ditty to enter a contest requiring rhyming, Verna. Any grammatical incongruencies are on purpose. (unless they ain*t)

reply by Verna Cole Mitchell on 24-Jul-2023

Big smile!!

Comment from Sally Law

Excellent

How fun is this? It has so much pop and flash to it. Like a dance! Sending you my best today as always and best wishes for the upcoming contest.
Sally Law :))

 Comment Written 23-Jul-2023

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reply by the author on 23-Jul-2023

Thank you, Sal

Comment from Debbie D'Arcy

Excellent

This is a wonderful, musical 'beebop' verse which is great fun and a joy to read. In fact it's so good it deserves more than one read. If anything's going to cheer you up it's this trip to the barber's. Good luck! Debbie

 Comment Written 23-Jul-2023

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reply by the author on 23-Jul-2023

Thank you, Debbie

Comment from royowen

Excellent

This is a great exercise in inner and outer rhyme, you've done a great job, it's a real tongue twister, the theme is obscure, but fun poetry quite often is, when the poetic devices are flowing as well as these are. Beautifully written my friend, good luck, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 23-Jul-2023

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reply by the author on 23-Jul-2023

Thanks, Roy

reply by royowen on 23-Jul-2023

A pleasure

Comment from Rachelle Allen

Exceptional

Dr. Seuss? Is that you? Here on FS??!!!

I LOVE THIS SOOOOO much!!! I always read poetry out loud as I'm reviewing because I can tell more easily that way what feels, to my musician's ear, like a real song. Needless to say, yours is a SYMPHONY...and I'm talking the Boston Pops variety what with its lilting, non-stop alliterations and onomatopoeia! Oy!! This was just DELIGHTFUL...and so different (and FUN) from all the other entries!

I can see this one in the winner's circle, Mystery Writer, and although I haven't read all the entries yet, I can pretty well imagine it will be getting my help arriving there!! xo

 Comment Written 23-Jul-2023

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reply by the author on 23-Jul-2023

Thank you, Rachelle, for the terrific review.

Comment from JT traveller

Excellent

I have no idea what a popo cop is but what a really cool poem you have created.

Full of fun and frivolity. It made me want to dance and sing. Well done. Great job. Jacqueline

 Comment Written 23-Jul-2023

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reply by the author on 23-Jul-2023

I will change it to po-po, which is slang for police.

Comment from Dolly'sPoems

Excellent

This is a fun right and quite a tongue twister too! I loved the choice of words and this could be a winner for the contest, I'm not quite sure what it is all about, but it is fun to read, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 23-Jul-2023

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reply by the author on 23-Jul-2023

Thank you, Dolly.

Comment from Stephen Samuel Madison

Good

The use of the OP word makes this poem POP no pun intended. Very strong sound to choose. I do feel like it relies too much on trying to rhythm instead of telling a story or giving a clear image. The story i seem to be getting is being inspired by music and making it to the top but its not very clear or clear thats the right path im on

 Comment Written 22-Jul-2023

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reply by the author on 22-Jul-2023

The challenge was to b3 a rhyming poem, so I felt that was preferred over message.