2023 Gypsy's Haiku
Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "Midnight Shadows"x
9 total reviews
Comment from Jumbo J
Hi MariVal,
you painted such a descriptive visual image with these ten words... these fifteen words, very impressive!
Always a delight and pleasure to read a master of their craft displaying their excellence.
With our thoughts we create...
vision thorough mottled light.
Warm regards,
James.
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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Hi MariVal,
you painted such a descriptive visual image with these ten words... these fifteen words, very impressive!
Always a delight and pleasure to read a master of their craft displaying their excellence.
With our thoughts we create...
vision thorough mottled light.
Warm regards,
James.
Comment Written 08-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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Thank you very much, James, I appreciate your insightful review
and kind words.
besitos y abrazos para mi amigo preferido :)
MariVal
Comment from aryr
What a great haiku, Gypsy. Your picture works wonders. Your words were serpurb by causing the action of your words. The thought of veiling her face were a surprise. Blessed Be n Hugs!!!
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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What a great haiku, Gypsy. Your picture works wonders. Your words were serpurb by causing the action of your words. The thought of veiling her face were a surprise. Blessed Be n Hugs!!!
Comment Written 08-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind feedback.
Gypsy hugs
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Most welcome, Gypsy.
Comment from AP Apgar
I like your haiku poem- good picture presentation- good syllable count and flow - maybe a pause (-)
After streetlight breaks midnight veils - Good job
AP
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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I like your haiku poem- good picture presentation- good syllable count and flow - maybe a pause (-)
After streetlight breaks midnight veils - Good job
AP
Comment Written 08-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind feedback.
Gypsy hugs
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I am guessing the shadows and the tangled streetlights are used as metaphors in this poem. Life does gives up shadows, some are very dark. Thank you for sharing this Haiku with us. I enjoyed reading.
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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I am guessing the shadows and the tangled streetlights are used as metaphors in this poem. Life does gives up shadows, some are very dark. Thank you for sharing this Haiku with us. I enjoyed reading.
Comment Written 08-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind feedback.
Gypsy hugs
Comment from shelley kaye
it looks like she's wearing a wedding dress so "veils across her face" is a perfect satori!
i also like the "tangled streetlights"
good work - thank you for sharing
shelley :)
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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it looks like she's wearing a wedding dress so "veils across her face" is a perfect satori!
i also like the "tangled streetlights"
good work - thank you for sharing
shelley :)
Comment Written 08-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind feedback.
Gypsy hugs
Comment from Verna Cole Mitchell
This is a lovely haiku. I like, especially, the line "tangled with the streetlight." It carries through from "Midnight shadows" beautifully. This is very creative.
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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This is a lovely haiku. I like, especially, the line "tangled with the streetlight." It carries through from "Midnight shadows" beautifully. This is very creative.
Comment Written 08-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind feedback.
Gypsy hugs
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
Beautiful. A shadow falls in one instant and the next, it may change.
Impressionistic artists did that with capturing light during exact moments in time. This poem reminded me of those artists I love.
Love,
Alexan
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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Beautiful. A shadow falls in one instant and the next, it may change.
Impressionistic artists did that with capturing light during exact moments in time. This poem reminded me of those artists I love.
Love,
Alexan
Comment Written 08-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind feedback.
Gypsy hugs
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You're welcome!
Alexan hugs :)
Comment from JSD
Again you are adept at mixing the senses. Just lovely. Streetlight veils. Light becomes fabric. It's a technique but it works so well in your hands. Personally I'd have 'tangle' as I always prefer the immediacy of present tense. But then again the past tense gives a sense of an event that has occurred. Hmm. X
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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Again you are adept at mixing the senses. Just lovely. Streetlight veils. Light becomes fabric. It's a technique but it works so well in your hands. Personally I'd have 'tangle' as I always prefer the immediacy of present tense. But then again the past tense gives a sense of an event that has occurred. Hmm. X
Comment Written 08-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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Thank you very much for the exceptional five stars review and kind words. I changed to tangle, it's a good suggestion.
gypsy hugs
Comment from lyenochka
Yes, those of us who have lived through many more seasons and some have deeper shadows in those seasons, do wear more of those telltale veils on our faces!
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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Yes, those of us who have lived through many more seasons and some have deeper shadows in those seasons, do wear more of those telltale veils on our faces!
Comment Written 08-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2023
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Thank you very much for the exceptional five stars review, big sister. I hope you are having a great weekend.
Love,
MariVal