Reviews from

Return To Concorde Valley

Viewing comments for Chapter 3 "Tree Walking"
Fantasy based on the intersection of two worlds.

19 total reviews 
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
Excellent
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What a nice picture. It so fits your story. How did you think up walking in the trees. It makes perfect sense to me. And we have seen bears catch fish with their hands, why can't people? Good writing friend. Karen

 Comment Written 14-Jan-2024


reply by the author on 14-Jan-2024
    Thank you, again, Karen! You really are a sweetheart.

    I actually created the basis for the story in my teens. I happened upon a list of ideas and have written several books based on them. I used to spend a lot of time in trees and just thought about a race of people who used tree walking as part of their culture.

    Funny where ideas come from.

    Hugs,
    Rhonda
Comment from Pam (respa)
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Great artwork and story to go with it, Rhonda. I like how you begin with an overall summary of what has happened, as well as the notes. You take us into the world of Theo and how he is willing to help Echo. I love the fantasy aspect as he spends the time teaching her Greek words and how to walk in trees, as well as carving a small horse for her. It is interesting because a few days ago we watched an animated movie called "Wolf Walker." It was on apple t.v.

Theo is very kind and patient, as well as a good teacher. I think he had a good role model for that! Echo is a quick learner and soon they are both high in the tree. I can understand Echo wanting to go with Theo when he goes to catch some fish for dinner, and she wants to learn how, too. She is willing to wait for him as he asked, and I like the ending with his kiss on her cheek. I also like how you end with a question, making us wonder what the answer is.

Very well done,my friend.

 Comment Written 06-Jul-2023


reply by the author on 07-Jul-2023
    Pam,
    I?m so glad you were able to catch this chapter and for the brilliant 6 stars. That?s so encouraging for someone trying to restart their cold engines, lol.

    You?re right on Theo?s teacher. Both his parents are exceptionally gifted on that. When I?m finished posting this book, I?m going to do a prequel that will explain a lot about them.

    I?ll have to check out Wolf Walker. Sounds right down my alley.

    Thanks again, dear friend!

    Take care,
    Rhonda
reply by Pam (respa) on 07-Jul-2023
    You are very welcome, Rhonda. I wouldn't miss your chapter. I go by due dates, and believe it or not I follow stories by 5 writers, including you. The teacher reference I made was you😊 I think you would like Wolf Walker. It is based on a series of 3 books, each one a different subject.
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2023
    Awwww, so sweet!
reply by Pam (respa) on 08-Jul-2023
    😊😊
Comment from rspoet
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hello Rhonda,
Another marvelous chapter in the story of Theo and Echo.
I used to climb trees, but not the way Theo does. Sounds like a lot of fun,
of course, you have to believe.
I thought Theo's green eyes might have indicated some connection to the leaves, but if Echo can climb too, I guess the eyes have nothing to do with it.
Apparently Theo can also communicate telepathically or without a phone.
I think Rebecca may be an important character at some point.
Well done.
Best wishes.
Robert


 Comment Written 06-Jul-2023


reply by the author on 07-Jul-2023
    Hi Robert, thank you for the brilliant 6 stars. How delightful!

    Thea?s eyes have something to do with his heritage and who his father is. Echo will find out later that all of Thea?s people are tree walkers, but more on that later.

    Rebecca is one of several of Theo?s siblings, and will reappear later.

    Thank you, again, for the stars and commentary!
    Rhonda

Comment from forestport12
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I really like what you are doing with the trees and how this boy can walk with ease through them. You leave enough on the table to of intrigue, wondering if she will be found and what may lurk around the corner. To me, if I read fantasy, the key has to be character driven, creating interesting people. And you do. You've made the reader really care what happens to her next.

 Comment Written 06-Jul-2023


reply by the author on 07-Jul-2023
    Thank you so much for the care you?ve taken in reviewing this chapter, and for your helpful comments. What you?ve said will help direct the nuances in the next chapter.

    Take care,
    Rhonda
reply by forestport12 on 07-Jul-2023
    I never give advice like others on technical matters, because I always need help editing and make many mistakes in grammar. But I would refrain from advice as a whole, since you have those writer instincts to know how to grab the reader and tell a darn good story. But I will encourage your journey. "Too good unto all men (woman), esp. the household of Faith."
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2023
    Amen!
Comment from BethShelby
Excellent
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This story captures me and makes me want to read more. I anxious to find our what is going to happen with this and more about Anthos. I'll look forward to you nex post.

 Comment Written 05-Jul-2023


reply by the author on 07-Jul-2023
    Thank you so much, Beth. I?m anxious for you to continue reading.
    Take care,
    Rhonda
Comment from Liz O'Neill
Excellent
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This will give the reader cause to pause: "Is that the language you speak?" Echo had learned about other languages in school. There was a boy from Italy in her class, and another from Sudan in a class across the hall." Good guidance for all of us: "Good, now let its scent, how it smells, fill your nose and surround your senses." This has many thoughts of wisdom. Well done

 Comment Written 05-Jul-2023


reply by the author on 07-Jul-2023
    Liz, thank you for your review,
    Rhonda
reply by Liz O'Neill on 07-Jul-2023
    ***Smile***
Comment from Teri7
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a very interesting and very well written chapter you have penned. You used great descriptive words and very good dialogue too. As I was reading this I could just imagine how they were in the trees and the feelings. Great job! love and blessings, Teri

 Comment Written 05-Jul-2023


reply by the author on 05-Jul-2023
    Thank you, Teri. What a terrific review! I'm so glad the imagery came through and stoked the imagination.
    hugs,
    Rhonda
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Excellent
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I wish I could give you a six, Rhonda, this is a fabulous story, and kids all over the world of all ages, will love it. To be able to climb trees the way squirrels and monkeys can, swinging and climbing without fear of falling, must be wonderful. This chapter could easily be true, with feeling, smelling and becoming one with the tree, it could be how the creatures do it. I very much enjoyed reading this chapter, my friend. Well done!! :) Sandra xx

 Comment Written 05-Jul-2023


reply by the author on 05-Jul-2023
    Hi Sandra! Thank you so much for your review. I?m glad I was able to get the message across about nature. It?s about to hit an older audience, but still kid friendly!
    Take care,
    Rhonda
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
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There is something magical going on here. It seems Echo is a fast learner and was meant to meet this unusual young boy. He's teaching her things she would never learn otherwise.

Is there a reason that you reference Theo/Anthos by two names? Is he different when he's called one or the other? It could be a source of confusion.

 Comment Written 03-Jul-2023


reply by the author on 03-Jul-2023
    I need to change that. Theo is his nickname, but I'm not sure there's a good reason for it. Jay, also, brought up that he didn't feel it worked.

    The meeting between the two kids turns out to be opportune and planned.
reply by lyenochka on 03-Jul-2023
    Both are important as Theo comes from theos for God and Anthos reminds me of anthropos (man) so this character seems to have a Christlike nature a son of God and man?
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2023
    I think I'm going to stick with Theo, at least in the beginning. Like you, I chose names for reasons, and there is definitely an allegory going here. Part man, part God. You actually nailed it.
reply by lyenochka on 03-Jul-2023
    Great! You had my attention with the Greek as I try to read a verse in NT Greek once a day
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2023
    Oh cool! This gets more and more Greek as we go.

    And kudos to you on the Greek!
reply by lyenochka on 04-Jul-2023
    Since it was the Greek missionaries, Cyril and Methodius who brought literacy to the Slavic Church in 988, I found the Greek very similar grammatically to Russian.
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2023
    Oh wow, and my husband is Czech and their language is very similar to Russian. Small world, for sure.
reply by lyenochka on 04-Jul-2023
    Yes, Czech is similar.
    Have you recovered fully from that accident a few years ago? Are you retired from teaching science now?
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2023
    Thanks for remembering! I am mostly recovered, a few issues now and then, otherwise fine. The next two years I was in and out of the hospital following intestinal surgery. That?s when I stopped writing. I had so much anesthesia from multiple operations, it gave me brain fog. I?ve found supplements that have overcome that effect, and so I?m back to writing! Yay!

    I retired for a few years, but have gone back due to an extreme teacher shortage. I?m teaching all sciences at a small high school and loving it.
    How are things going with you?
reply by lyenochka on 04-Jul-2023
    So glad you are recovered and are able to help teach again in those schools. Wow, what helped with the brain fog?
    Lots happening as we're in the middle of a move and I documented the first leg of it through our cat Patch's perspective a week ago.
Comment from prettybluebirds
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I was glad to find another chapter to your story here today. It is a cute and original story. Your writing is smooth, and the story is interesting and easy to follow. Nice writing.

 Comment Written 03-Jul-2023


reply by the author on 03-Jul-2023
    Thanks so much, dear friend. I appreciate you!
    Rhonda