Taste of My Reality
Viewing comments for Chapter 60 "Joined at the Hip "The Pathway to Pain and Misery
2 total reviews
Comment from dellsworthpoet
An interesting set of contemplations. The flow is good. The language fitting to the philosophical nature of the piece. The images are clear.
Suggestions:
Day tonight Darkness to Light.
It looks like you were looking for parallelism in this statement. In this case "tonight" should be "to night".
Fire wind water earth to ventual birth.
Ventual is not a word unless it is short for eventual and in that case, the rule is to use an apostrophe where the missing letters are as in 'ventual.
Man is nothing but nil.
Again I would look at parallelism and use two less-used words "naught to nil". It might flow a bit better.
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2023
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An interesting set of contemplations. The flow is good. The language fitting to the philosophical nature of the piece. The images are clear.
Suggestions:
Day tonight Darkness to Light.
It looks like you were looking for parallelism in this statement. In this case "tonight" should be "to night".
Fire wind water earth to ventual birth.
Ventual is not a word unless it is short for eventual and in that case, the rule is to use an apostrophe where the missing letters are as in 'ventual.
Man is nothing but nil.
Again I would look at parallelism and use two less-used words "naught to nil". It might flow a bit better.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2023
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Thanks for sharing your time and review and have a blessed day.
Doctor Ricky
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You are welcome.
Comment from jim vecchio
I haven't seen an entry like this yet, but I always give as many stars as allowable to those who honor The Lord in their works. I certainly hope that individual is able to find his Faith again!
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2023
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I haven't seen an entry like this yet, but I always give as many stars as allowable to those who honor The Lord in their works. I certainly hope that individual is able to find his Faith again!
Comment Written 23-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2023
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Thanks for your review and have a Blessed day.
Doctor Ricky
