Comment from Doc Fin

Average

I really liked the detail, especially in the opening scene. I could imagine the dress, and the reaction to it. The dialogue seemed very natural, even when it was a bit abbreviated.

A few spelling errors jumped out - "their" instead of "there", small things like that. I was confused by the reference to height as it pertained to spending the night in a hospital.

Overall, this feels like a peek at a rich story, but I would like more than a peek. Can you provide a few more details that will help me "feel" the experiences of your characters? What color are the walls in the hospital, and does that color affect the ambience or the mood of the characters? Things like that. I want the inside scoop!

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 Comment Written 22-May-2023

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reply by the author on 22-May-2023

Unbelievable! A three star review from someone who's been here five minutes. That's no way to get your footing on FanStory. A three star review is considered an insult. I have muted you from my pages.

Comment from royowen

Excellent

To find love, or rather love finding us is such a precious commodity, we don't have to be like our parents, the principle is, I want to be a better version of them, and my children to be a better version of me, let them dance on our roof, their floor our ceiling. I am unworthy of God and my wife, by I'm glad they love me. Great example of t reflection, Sally, keep your eyes looking upward. Blessings Roy

 Comment Written 22-May-2023

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reply by the author on 27-May-2023

Thank you so much, dear Roy! I'm so blessed! Sal XOs

reply by royowen on 27-May-2023

Amen

Comment from Ben Colder

Exceptional

For God is Love. He that knows God will love. He who does not know God will never love. You opened this with the Word. Well done, Sal. Sending blessings your way.

 Comment Written 22-May-2023

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reply by the author on 27-May-2023

Thank you so much for the awesome review and super stars, my friend. Blessings to you always.
Sal :)) xo

Comment from Teri7

Excellent

Sally, This is a very beautiful and very well written chapter. You used great descriptive and loving words. It made my heart happy as I read it. Beautiful imagery from the picture! love and blessings, Teri

 Comment Written 22-May-2023

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reply by the author on 27-May-2023

Thank you for the excellent review, Teri dear! Blessings to you always,
Sal XOs

Comment from patcelaw

Exceptional

This is such a beautiful wedding chapter you have presented for us in this book. I enjoyed listening to it very much at one point when Simon talks about not wanting to be like his father I came to admire Simon very much. I wish you the very best with all of your writing. Patricia

 Comment Written 22-May-2023

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reply by the author on 27-May-2023

Wow! Aren't you so sweet and generous, my newest fan! I'm so blessed to have you close to me. I'm delighted you've enjoyed the book so far. Blessings to you always, dear Patricia.
Sal XOs

Comment from barbara.wilkey

Excellent

Thank you for sharing this with us. You did a beautiful job describing their love. It was perfect. I am worried about Fitzgerald Elling. I fear we are not done with him. Until he's dead, he's a danger.

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 Comment Written 22-May-2023

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reply by the author on 27-May-2023

Thank you for the lovely review and insightful comments. Both mean so much. Sending you my best today as always.
Sal xoxo's