Please Bring Me Flowers
Short Fiction35 total reviews
Comment from Zoe Webb
Thank you so much for reading Skin-walker! I thought I'd check out your portfolio, and found this piece. Here are my notes:
I thought this was clever... especially how you draw the reader in the middle of the con. We feel the confusion and hurt Marla might feel, had she been aware she was being taken advantage of.
Wish I had six stars to give, but am out!
Best,
Zoe
reply by the author on 11-May-2023
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Thank you so much for reading Skin-walker! I thought I'd check out your portfolio, and found this piece. Here are my notes:
I thought this was clever... especially how you draw the reader in the middle of the con. We feel the confusion and hurt Marla might feel, had she been aware she was being taken advantage of.
Wish I had six stars to give, but am out!
Best,
Zoe
Comment Written 11-May-2023
reply by the author on 11-May-2023
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Thank you Zoe for going back and reading one of my pieces. I love to write fiction. I enjoyed reading your work because of your excellent writing skills. I'm glad to know you felt my writing warranted six stars. I am honored.
Comment from Annmuma
Wow!!! What a surprise ending and excellently written story. I know this sort of thing does happen, but I find it so reprehensible that it is totally unexpected to me. On the other hand, I find a certain amount of 'good' in the actions even though the goals may be totally financial. There are nursing home residents no in need of someone to care and love. No spag; great descriptions; words paint pictures where every character is known and seen. Good post. ann
reply by the author on 06-Apr-2023
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Wow!!! What a surprise ending and excellently written story. I know this sort of thing does happen, but I find it so reprehensible that it is totally unexpected to me. On the other hand, I find a certain amount of 'good' in the actions even though the goals may be totally financial. There are nursing home residents no in need of someone to care and love. No spag; great descriptions; words paint pictures where every character is known and seen. Good post. ann
Comment Written 06-Apr-2023
reply by the author on 06-Apr-2023
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Thank you Ann, for your review and encouraging comments. Thank you also for SIX beautiful, bright, shiny stars. All are greatly appreciated.
Blessings, LJButterfly
Comment from eliz100
What an exciting story. I was pulled in the beginning, and then I was blind-sided by the devious revelation of the character of your two characters. I do not see any room for improvement. Have a blessed day.
reply by the author on 06-Apr-2023
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What an exciting story. I was pulled in the beginning, and then I was blind-sided by the devious revelation of the character of your two characters. I do not see any room for improvement. Have a blessed day.
Comment Written 06-Apr-2023
reply by the author on 06-Apr-2023
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Thank you eliz100, for your review, encouraging comments, and generous stars. I greatly appreciate all.
Blessings, LJButterfly
Comment from Ulla
Deare me, that was a clever thought out scam. I actually never saw this coming which is the trademark of great writing. I really enjoyed this story. All best, Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2023
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Deare me, that was a clever thought out scam. I actually never saw this coming which is the trademark of great writing. I really enjoyed this story. All best, Ulla:)))
Comment Written 03-Apr-2023
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2023
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Thank you so much Ulla, for your review, encouraging comments, and generous stars. I truly appreciate your reading my story.
Blessings, LJButterfly
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
Marla ran both hands through her cropped, steel gray hair, as though she could massage the memory back into her mind. I like this line because there's great imagery and because it shows the desperation of this woman.
Argh! This is not the ending I expected, but it does give us something different and totally unexpected. It pains me to think that there are people like this in the world - and idiots running the nursing homes who don't know strangers from family.
Nicely done.
Pam
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2023
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Marla ran both hands through her cropped, steel gray hair, as though she could massage the memory back into her mind. I like this line because there's great imagery and because it shows the desperation of this woman.
Argh! This is not the ending I expected, but it does give us something different and totally unexpected. It pains me to think that there are people like this in the world - and idiots running the nursing homes who don't know strangers from family.
Nicely done.
Pam
Comment Written 02-Apr-2023
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2023
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Thank you Pam, for your review and outstanding and encouraging comments. While writing this, I considered how such a scam could be accomplished. It would only work in a small town where everyone trusts everyone. Only a nursing home could stop this by requesting a birth certificate before the patient's will was changed.
Thanks again for reading, and for SIX beautiful, bright, shiny stars, which I greatly appreciate.
Blessings, LJButterfly
Comment from LisaMay
Apart from appreciating your skill as a writer demonstrated here, this cleverly constructed tale brought me real heartache... which shows how effective (and affective) your story is. Acts of fraud and elder-abuse make me furious - taking advantage of vulnerability. This feeling is deepened because my own father had Alzheimers. I looked after him at home for 5 years but then he had to spend 3 more in a care facility. He got to a stage where he didn't know me or remember my name. If anyone had dealt with him unfairly... God help them!
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2023
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Apart from appreciating your skill as a writer demonstrated here, this cleverly constructed tale brought me real heartache... which shows how effective (and affective) your story is. Acts of fraud and elder-abuse make me furious - taking advantage of vulnerability. This feeling is deepened because my own father had Alzheimers. I looked after him at home for 5 years but then he had to spend 3 more in a care facility. He got to a stage where he didn't know me or remember my name. If anyone had dealt with him unfairly... God help them!
Comment Written 02-Apr-2023
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2023
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Thank you so much Lisa, for your review and very encouraging comments. Thank you also for sharing a bit of your story. I know it was difficult when your father did not remember your name.
I live in the U.S. state of Florida, where lots of retirees, like me, come to live. There are always, always, people out to scam seniors. I've been scammed. It's painful.
Thank you again for reading, and for SIX beautiful, bright, shiny stars, which I greatly appreciate.
Blessings, LJButterfly
Comment from shelley kaye
omg i so did not see that ending coming! this story makes me mad and sad and i still wonder how many times it really happens...
very well-crafted!
thank you for sharing
shelley :)
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2023
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omg i so did not see that ending coming! this story makes me mad and sad and i still wonder how many times it really happens...
very well-crafted!
thank you for sharing
shelley :)
Comment Written 02-Apr-2023
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2023
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Thank you so much Shelley, for your review, encouraging comments, and generous stars. I truly appreciate all.
Blessings, LJButterfly
Comment from Ric Myworld
It's hard for me to even imagine such a sweetheart of a woman like you coming up with such a devious story. LOL. I only wish I had a six to reward it properly. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2023
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It's hard for me to even imagine such a sweetheart of a woman like you coming up with such a devious story. LOL. I only wish I had a six to reward it properly. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2023
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2023
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Thank you Ric for your review and lovely comments. I appreciate your constant support and virtual six. Thanks again for reading.
Blessings, LJButterfly
Comment from nomi338
Some grifters are expert at their craft. You wrote thos so convincingly that I now have to wonder about your calling. I begin to wonder, what do you do for a living? LOL. Please do not get offended. I am only jesting. I have been told that I sometimes go too far in searching for a laugh. I usually just laugh that off. This is really a very well written story. It probably is taking place someplace as we speak.
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2023
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Some grifters are expert at their craft. You wrote thos so convincingly that I now have to wonder about your calling. I begin to wonder, what do you do for a living? LOL. Please do not get offended. I am only jesting. I have been told that I sometimes go too far in searching for a laugh. I usually just laugh that off. This is really a very well written story. It probably is taking place someplace as we speak.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2023
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2023
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Wow! I am surely not offended, but honored. I am a retired social worker after 30 years, retired early childhood teacher after 13 years, and a retired church musician. (I'm an older spring chicken) Lol.
In 2019 a poet friend invited me to her writing group at the library. I never, ever, thought of writing. I wrote a few short stories for the group and Covid came and shut it down. In 2020 I joined FanStory, and people actually said they liked my stories. Who knew? Not me.
Helen (lyenochka) interviewed me shortly after you.
Thank you so much for your review and encouraging comments. And many thanks to you for SIX beautiful, bright, shiny stars. I truly appreciate them.
Blessings, LJButterfly
Comment from Sanku
Oh My God .what a twist .Such devious couple .! The story was very well written and was able to read smoothly in one go.. You have a clever way of story telling ...
thanks for sharing
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2023
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Oh My God .what a twist .Such devious couple .! The story was very well written and was able to read smoothly in one go.. You have a clever way of story telling ...
thanks for sharing
Comment Written 01-Apr-2023
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2023
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Thank you Sanku, for your review and inspiring comments. Most of my fiction ends in an odd way or with an unexpected twist. Thanks for reading, and for your generous stars.
Blessings, LJButterfly
