Comment from AP Apgar

Excellent

I Like your tanka poem- excellent picture presentation- very good flow - story line is clear- good use of metaphors- deep black hole in my chest- nice- good job AP

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2023

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reply by the author on 20-Mar-2023

Thank you very much for your time, kind review, and helpfull feedback.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from Mark Schardine

Excellent

Nothing fills our hearts with as much sorrow as seeing another person's despair. When it seems that person will jump off the cliff to end it, we feel helpless. Did it have to come to this?

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2023

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reply by the author on 19-Mar-2023

Thank you very much for your time, kind review, and helpfull feedback.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from barbara.wilkey

Excellent

Strong verbs, assaults and cursed. Vivid descriptions, cliff's edge, cruel cold wind, deep black hole. Wow! This poem gets right to the point. LOL Thank you for sharing. This is wonderful.

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2023

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reply by the author on 19-Mar-2023

Hello, Barbara,

thank you for the exceptional five stars review and kind words. Have a wonderful day (or night).

Gypsy hugs

Comment from Mike Stevens

Excellent

Another fine poem, Gypsy, and one that shines a light on a very dark subject, one that is hard for me to relate to because I can't imagine getting to such a dark state of mind, but is very real to those who are in such a dark mental state

 Comment Written 19-Mar-2023

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reply by the author on 19-Mar-2023

Hello, Mike,

thank you for the exceptional five stars review and kind words. Have a wonderful day (or night).

Gypsy hugs

Comment from lyenochka

Excellent

Powerfully written. That "cliff's edge" says a lot and we switch from just noticing the strong, assaulting wind to the despair felt by the narrator driven to the cliff's edge. Thanks for the reminder of the hotline.

 Comment Written 18-Mar-2023

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reply by the author on 18-Mar-2023

Thank you, big sister, I appreciate your insightful review and feedback. I know how it feels. This tanka could be taken in a couple of ways.

Love you,

MariVal

reply by lyenochka on 18-Mar-2023

You're welcome! I'm about to post the interview now. Your answers were great! The ending has a surprise for you. 😊💖

Comment from Ginda Simpson

Excellent

Your very first line introduces us to some dark threat lurking. You build tension in the lines that follow and lead us to the unspeakable grief following suicide. This is a powerful piece. Well crafted.

 Comment Written 18-Mar-2023

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reply by the author on 18-Mar-2023

Thank you, Ginda, I appreciate your insightful and kind review. Have a lovely night (or day).

Gypsy hugs

Comment from Eternal Muse

Excellent

Wow - Gypsy, you cut deep with this one. The girl in the poem is on the edge. She is ready to end her life deeply hurt by the man she loves. Thank you for your valuable author notes - I learned a lot.

This is a great social commentary, and it needs to be heard.

Loved your tanka and your artistic presentation.

 Comment Written 18-Mar-2023

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reply by the author on 18-Mar-2023

Thank you, my friend, I appreciate your insightful and kind review. Have a lovely night (or day).

Gypsy hugs