A Poetic Mystery
Viewing comments for Prologue "Sorceress Origins"A journey through pages
6 total reviews
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Of all of them, yours is the most memorable for me. I loved your use of the word, 'wrung' and the build-up in the verse to the middle section which is so rich in imagery: darkness, fear, 'silk fingers felt tragic' The internal rhyme is exquisite in places and helps carry this poignant story so well to its conclusion when we 're told that, with the end of your childhood, comes a sort of reckoning. This is the beginning of going it alone from your inner sanctuary and that separation (from your sorceress) will be troubled and hard. I hope I've done this fine verse justice. You have my vote. Take care, Debbie
reply by the author on 03-May-2023
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Of all of them, yours is the most memorable for me. I loved your use of the word, 'wrung' and the build-up in the verse to the middle section which is so rich in imagery: darkness, fear, 'silk fingers felt tragic' The internal rhyme is exquisite in places and helps carry this poignant story so well to its conclusion when we 're told that, with the end of your childhood, comes a sort of reckoning. This is the beginning of going it alone from your inner sanctuary and that separation (from your sorceress) will be troubled and hard. I hope I've done this fine verse justice. You have my vote. Take care, Debbie
Comment Written 03-May-2023
reply by the author on 03-May-2023
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Thank you so much what a fine compliment you have paid me. I'm very much appreciating it right absolutely. I'm not a nice smell and glad that you like them as long as somebody. Does I am satisfied and happy. Thank you for your kind words and for your insight and for your reviews always important and special to me. Thank you very much have a great day!
Comment from Liz O'Neill
I love this: "When I was young, was lonely and wrung," A great metaphor too. Your alliteration of s's is perfect. The hushing and secrecy: "held in darkness. Sometimes just whispers of air." & more. This may be a healing book for some.
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2023
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I love this: "When I was young, was lonely and wrung," A great metaphor too. Your alliteration of s's is perfect. The hushing and secrecy: "held in darkness. Sometimes just whispers of air." & more. This may be a healing book for some.
Comment Written 27-Apr-2023
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2023
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Thank you Liz! I'm so glad you liked it! These are my 1st scribblings ever. I started here two months ago and have written some poems and discovered that some words can indeed come together. Who would have thunked it..lol. I appreciate your kind words your comments and the time you took to write inappreciated by me. Thank you have agreed with me!
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***Hugs***
Comment from Chrissy710
Oh Lea, very powerful and yes many poems tell stories, and vice versa, and this poem was well written with internal rhyme etc that made for a good read. Although frightening and I am not sure what you will reveal over this month but it may well be very cathartic for you. A good start
Cheers Chris
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2023
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Oh Lea, very powerful and yes many poems tell stories, and vice versa, and this poem was well written with internal rhyme etc that made for a good read. Although frightening and I am not sure what you will reveal over this month but it may well be very cathartic for you. A good start
Cheers Chris
Comment Written 02-Apr-2023
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2023
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Thank you I'm also very insightful and time whichs valuable to you in to all I thank you for that as well.
You're awesome gay and once again thank you free time!
Comment from LJbutterfly
Your words are gentle and flow smoothly into a horrific story in poetic rhyme. Your heartbreaking description of a child who had to disappear from reality in order to survive, is gripping and sad. Your rage will come out in your poetry. Well done so far.
Oh my! I just noticed the artwork is by you. Beautiful. I look forward to experiencing your talent.
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2023
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Your words are gentle and flow smoothly into a horrific story in poetic rhyme. Your heartbreaking description of a child who had to disappear from reality in order to survive, is gripping and sad. Your rage will come out in your poetry. Well done so far.
Oh my! I just noticed the artwork is by you. Beautiful. I look forward to experiencing your talent.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2023
reply by the author on 01-Apr-2023
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Yes thank you I made it. I hope you like it and thank you so much for your review. I'm extremely appreciative and for your kind words and thoughtful message I really appreciate it!
Comment from Wayne Fowler
As a poem, I'm not qualified to really rate it.
In the day she was hidden, can't come when bidden, his power she couldn't yet handle. - Two she's and one his. I'm confused. Okay. the next sentence cleared it up.
this burden mom married, - (Mom) capitalize
It was then that I noticed, weird things held in darkness, - No commas needed. Period after 'darkness'
where, her rage is attracting her dues. - No comma needed
Best wishes.
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2023
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As a poem, I'm not qualified to really rate it.
In the day she was hidden, can't come when bidden, his power she couldn't yet handle. - Two she's and one his. I'm confused. Okay. the next sentence cleared it up.
this burden mom married, - (Mom) capitalize
It was then that I noticed, weird things held in darkness, - No commas needed. Period after 'darkness'
where, her rage is attracting her dues. - No comma needed
Best wishes.
Comment Written 31-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2023
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Thank you Wayne for your awesome review. Thank you for your comments for correction. I really appreciate those especially! Also for your time I am most grateful and for your kind rating!
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
This is a story of how the mind can make a place of safety where we can go that no one else can know and we can rest a while. Children who suffer trauma have a special friend who holds their hand when facing adversity. It is a pity you have such memories that make you angry today and it is understandable as domestic abuse can destroy our self-esteem and scar us forever, a poignant write Lea, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2023
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This is a story of how the mind can make a place of safety where we can go that no one else can know and we can rest a while. Children who suffer trauma have a special friend who holds their hand when facing adversity. It is a pity you have such memories that make you angry today and it is understandable as domestic abuse can destroy our self-esteem and scar us forever, a poignant write Lea, love Dolly x
Comment Written 31-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2023
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Thank you Dolly for your understanding and for your insight. I believe I'm doing the best and healthy thing I can do for myself. Which is to talk about it in one way or another so long as it's non destructive to others.
Thank you for your review and for your time. That's always and I hope you're have a great day and all that you wish for are come true!
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Glad to hear that Lea x x x
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Ty!
