Pay Day
Viewing comments for Chapter 12 "Pay Day, pt 12"One fine spring day at school
9 total reviews
Comment from Jay Squires
I don't think I've met any of these characters in any of your other novels -- not that I should be expected to. This can be potentially very dark, troubling in its subject matter. There is so much mass murder going on, and after each new incident is covered by the news, one of the first things out of the mouth of the newscaster is, "We don't yet know the motive." We are a people of motive-needers. We want to know what makes people tick. And we seem to have the need to find something humanizing about the murderer. Here, we find T.J. has been bullied, but Anthony appears to be a true sociopath. We see he enjoys the rumors about him and he smirks when asked about them.
This is good, Wayne. Scary good!
Jay
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023
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I don't think I've met any of these characters in any of your other novels -- not that I should be expected to. This can be potentially very dark, troubling in its subject matter. There is so much mass murder going on, and after each new incident is covered by the news, one of the first things out of the mouth of the newscaster is, "We don't yet know the motive." We are a people of motive-needers. We want to know what makes people tick. And we seem to have the need to find something humanizing about the murderer. Here, we find T.J. has been bullied, but Anthony appears to be a true sociopath. We see he enjoys the rumors about him and he smirks when asked about them.
This is good, Wayne. Scary good!
Jay
Comment Written 28-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023
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Thank you for your excellent review. And for the six stars! Thank you.
Comment from lyenochka
What a difference between the two stories of pairing up here! The two bombers/terrorists are attracted by their chilling plans to do evil and harm. But B and James seem to have some hidden connection that would lead, hopefully, to the redemption of James.
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023
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What a difference between the two stories of pairing up here! The two bombers/terrorists are attracted by their chilling plans to do evil and harm. But B and James seem to have some hidden connection that would lead, hopefully, to the redemption of James.
Comment Written 28-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023
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Thank you for your very nice review.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
Well-written story with a build-up of tension again. TJ and Anthony find each other and begin looking for a way to be noticed again, although TJ seems more intent on injuring or killing his father. B seems intent on showing James a new way of life, Christian life.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023
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Well-written story with a build-up of tension again. TJ and Anthony find each other and begin looking for a way to be noticed again, although TJ seems more intent on injuring or killing his father. B seems intent on showing James a new way of life, Christian life.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023
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Thank you for your very kind review.
Comment from Wendy G
The tension is increasing again, and you do this so well with all the interactions and relationships. One never knows if they will succeed nexttime or if God will work through the Bible Club students again. Good chapter.
Wendy
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023
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The tension is increasing again, and you do this so well with all the interactions and relationships. One never knows if they will succeed nexttime or if God will work through the Bible Club students again. Good chapter.
Wendy
Comment Written 27-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023
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Thank you for your very kind words.
My aim was to try to capture the variety of bad, AND good in people. And to try to show that without God's intervention, we could be in for a lot of grief.
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You have succeeded very well. You are showing the balance, and God's intervention as well.
W
Comment from eliz100
This is an excellent chapter. Youare creating a build up tension for the event that is being planned.I do not see any room for improvement. Have a blessed day.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023
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This is an excellent chapter. Youare creating a build up tension for the event that is being planned.I do not see any room for improvement. Have a blessed day.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023
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Thank you.
Comment from royowen
I think there's been one or two successful attempts to blow up religious places where they worship, I, quite frankly think there's no more dastardly method of creating mayhem and murder than this way. I love the paroxysms of expression of the characters too, working out in a gym, and fancy bringing shorts! Beautifully written Wayne, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023
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I think there's been one or two successful attempts to blow up religious places where they worship, I, quite frankly think there's no more dastardly method of creating mayhem and murder than this way. I love the paroxysms of expression of the characters too, working out in a gym, and fancy bringing shorts! Beautifully written Wayne, blessings Roy
Comment Written 27-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023
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Thank you for your very kind review.
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Welcome
Comment from Julie G1
Well done. This chapter is intriguing in its content, and word pictures of the characters. The choice of subject matter is timely, the language written is apt and effective. I hope to read more of this tale. Keep on writing.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023
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Well done. This chapter is intriguing in its content, and word pictures of the characters. The choice of subject matter is timely, the language written is apt and effective. I hope to read more of this tale. Keep on writing.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023
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Thank you for your very kind review.
Comment from papa55mike
What an interesting take on a misguided group out for revenge. It's a shame you can find all of this out on the internet. Please check; Delcheta" I don't think that quotation mark belongs. What a wonderfully written chapter. Best of luck with your book!
Have a great day, and God bless.
mike
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023
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What an interesting take on a misguided group out for revenge. It's a shame you can find all of this out on the internet. Please check; Delcheta" I don't think that quotation mark belongs. What a wonderfully written chapter. Best of luck with your book!
Have a great day, and God bless.
mike
Comment Written 27-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023
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Thank you for your very kind review.
Comment from Sarah Das Gupta
Successfully builds up the tension and opens a window on an aspect of American youth which is specially interesting to a UK reader. You are left wanting to read on!
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023
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Successfully builds up the tension and opens a window on an aspect of American youth which is specially interesting to a UK reader. You are left wanting to read on!
Comment Written 27-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023
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Thank you for your very nice review.
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All best wishes!
