Comment from Ric Myworld

Excellent

He swung open the French doors and stepped onto the balcony as he slipped and flipped over the wrought-iron railing and missed the pool. Not the morning he had expected. Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 28-Feb-2023

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reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023

Challenges.

Comment from kahpot

Excellent

What a wonderful read on someone wishing to improve themselves and their outlook, it is good to be optimistic, love the flow of this work as it reads very well, very well written****kahpot

 Comment Written 28-Feb-2023

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reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023

Thanks, kahpot

Comment from Mary Vigasin

Excellent

Great Job, Bill! Here a deathly ill man swears if he lives, He will lead a better life. Very well written and presented with great rhyming.
Best wishes,
Mary

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2023

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023

Thank you, Mary

Comment from Pam (respa)

Excellent

-Good artwork and story to go with it, Bill.
-You set the scene very well and give
good, descriptive detail about his situation.
-The paragraph about "every motion..."
is very good and shows his determination to be better.
-The conclusion follows that well as he
"swore to do more than before."
-Well done.

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2023

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023

Thanks, Pam

reply by Pam (respa) on 27-Feb-2023

You are welcome, Bill.

Comment from Ulla

Excellent

Hi Bill, yes how often has this not happened. The poor man survived and he swore to lead a better life and do more with it. I hope he achieved that. I really liked this poetry/prose story. Ulla:)))

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2023

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023

Thanks, Ulla, for giving this a look.

Comment from BethShelby

Excellent

I enjoyed your random rhyme/story. I assume whatever illness he had was a wake up call and having survivedm he appreciates life more and sees his recovery as chance to start over and live to the fullest.

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2023

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023

It is not uncommon for those who survive that which kills others, to dedicate their remaining lives to be all that they would have done.

Comment from w.j.debi

Excellent

I love the rhythm. In fact, I think it would make a good ditty to sing to children. The end rhymes are fun and add a dash of play to the rhythm and well-chosen words.

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2023

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023

Thanks, Debi

Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell

Excellent

I loved this one, Bill! I imagine the man thought he was going to die, but he didn't. Once his fever had broken, he swore he'd do more with his life than he did before. I love the poetry prose, it really worked so well, and really enjoyed reading it. Well done, my friend. :)) Sandra xx

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2023

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023

Thank you, Sandra, for giving this a look.

Comment from Dolly'sPoems

Excellent

We hope for improvements in life, especially with technology that has come on with leaps and bounds, but still some are left behind and cannot keep up. A poignant write Bill, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2023

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023

Thank you, Dolly, for giving this a look.

Comment from Teri7

Exceptional

Bill, This is a very interesting and well written short story you have penned for your book of Random Rhyme and Petty Pose. You used great descriptive words and good imagery. Thanks for sharing. Blessings, Teri

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2023

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reply by the author on 27-Feb-2023

Thank you, Teri, for giving this a look.